Слово 5. О покаянии

Let us not spend the time of real life in laziness and carelessness, soul, nor senselessly, like inexperienced infants, considering it sufficient for our salvation to remain in this place, inaccessible to women and worldly people, so as not to be deceived. For even in ancient times, for those who, with the help of the Most High and under the guidance of Moses, fled from Egypt and from Pharaoh, it was not enough for piety that they spent forty years in an uninhabited place, that is, in the desert, since they did not maintain reasonable faith in God, who delivered them from countless sorrows. It is not by changing places, soul, that one can please the Lord of all, and not by dressing in thin rags. One of this, that is, staying in the desert, is undertaken for the sake of extreme silence, and the other for the sake of complete humility. If someone, with both of them, is again entangled in rumors and worldly cares, he is no different from a dog who returns to his vomit, according to the word of the Supreme Apostle. Crying and mortification serves as an image, the soul, this external black rags, which convinces us, who have chosen it, to always recognize ourselves as having voluntarily died for real life, and this mortification consists in always hating with all our souls all carnal sensuality and worldly rumors, and living uncovetously and reverently, acquiring what we need from our labors and considering poverty as great wealth. If we again madly entangle ourselves with acquisitions, fame, drunkenness, and ridicule, to which, as a rule, all lawless lust is added, then there is no doubt that we will be given over to extreme torment, as having voluntarily and consciously lied to Christ in the vows we made. What could be worse than this? It is better, says the wisdom of God, not to promise and keep it, than to promise and deceive. And the Divine hymnist cries: Destroy all who speak lies (Ps. 5:7). Not by changing place and clothing, the soul, as stated above, pleases Christ God, but by purity of life and the acquisition of all virtues, firmly based on immaculate faith. And just as you, with the help of God’s grace, escaped the snares of mental Egypt, that is, this world: so try with all your might, protected by faith and the fear of God, to avoid the devil who owns it, who always attacks you strongly and furiously. And do not stop running from him until you see him drowned by the strong right hand of the Most High in a fiery abyss, together with all his chariots and strong armor-bearers, and you recognize yourself as covered by the cloud of the Paraclete, cooling the burning produced in you by ethereal enemies, active fiery thoughts of foul lusts. And not by a pillar of fire, but by the illumination of an ever-present light, you will see yourself being guided to the promised land - not to the one that Joshua divided for the Israelites, but which was promised by “the Firstborn of all creation, Red in kindness more than the sons of men,” born of the Maiden and the Blessed Virgin, the unfalse Christ our God - Jesus, Who Himself was the first to enter there, killing death. Always be sober, soul, for the mental Pharaoh who is always chasing you will not stop inventing evil against you. Do not wait, O dear soul, for the cessation of the barking he invents against you; for he, being envious and impudent by nature, does not tame his anger, always striving to plunge you into the flames of torment. Don't believe it when he retreats either; for then he tries most cunningly to catch you. In this way, he, the bad one, tries to subjugate you, encouraging you to weaken his constant strong sobriety, so that in this way, finding you lazy, he suddenly stings you with one of his many soul-destroying arrows, or with destructive arrogance, stops you on the path to success in greater virtues. As a mind very experienced in inventing evil, he knows what benefit we receive when we remain in sobriety, due to the misfortunes it inflicts, being strengthened from above by Divine grace. For if we are sober, then the misfortunes inflicted by him become the cause of great rewards for us, just as the fight against a strong opponent serves as an opportunity for an experienced fighter to receive great praise. For if, with the help of your Savior, you escape the hands of the all-destructive Pharaoh, and you go through the dark depths of fiery passions dry, and not wet, as the divinely inspired word secretly teaches us, that is, you make the transition in thinness and poverty, also on foot, and not sitting on horseback, that is, always recognizing in thoughts, and not in words, your thinness and extreme unworthiness, then you will dwell at the hill of Mount Sinai in the desert, that is, you will reach the sacred haven of praiseworthy and wonderful dispassion, with which the Holy Spirit especially delights. Take care, accursed one, so that you do not become possessed like those ungrateful people, and do not indulge in overeating and drunkenness and dancing, so that you do not consider your womb the most expensive and sacred object, and do not give it godlike worship, as they then worshiped the calf, and so that you do not lose future benefits, as they lost the promised land, and you will be given over to endless torment, in which you will suffer worse. all those who were infidels before the law. If you really love Christ, your King, who tasted death on the cross for you, then try with all your might to instill His divine love into your soul. There is no other way to achieve this except if you completely hate all your wishes. And again, there is no way to hate these latter unless you instill the fear of God in your heart; You cannot acquire the fear of God unless you drive away from yourself all doubt and the desire to appear wise, and you do not follow your Lord, like a gentle baby, obeying His commands. Just as love is the fulfillment of the entire law, so faith is the foundation of all virtues in general: fear is born from faith, and from this the fulfillment of the commandments, through which the mind is filled with divine love. Having been worthy of this, think humbly, considering yourself to be dust, so that you can always remain in the pleasure of divine desires. You might be interested in: