Слово 44. Какие слова прилично было произносить Петру, когда он отвергся Христа и «плакася горько»

Woe is me, woe is me! Alas for me, alas, alas! With what streams of tears will I cleanse my wickedness, wretched one? With what heavy lamentations will I wash away my iniquity? Truly, woe is me, for Christ, Who is the life of all and the light, my Creator, the giver of life and the Lord, Who came from above to seek me and for my sake gave up His soul to death - I have denied myself three times - woe is me! - afraid of the worthless slave, and forgetting all His gifts that I received from Him. Alas for me! What did I suffer and what, beyond expectation, happened to me? Oh, how much unbelief and ingratitude I showed towards You, Savior, turning out to be much worse than Your traitor! Having been honored by You with greater honor than all Your other followers, so that the very keys of the heavenly kingdom were entrusted to me, and I was recognized by You, my Savior, as supreme and superior over them - how will I now pay for myself according to my dignity? Alas for me, wretched one! With what touching sobs will I beg and make myself merciful to the impartial Judge? However, I know the abyss of Your bounty, Master, and the fact that You immediately forgive all sins of those who diligently show warm repentance; I know that You have shown mercy to both the filthy harlot and the prodigal son, the one who wet Your most pure feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair, and this one, as he cried out: I have sinned, Father, and I am no longer worthy to be called Your son; I know that the unrighteous publican was immediately justified as soon as he cried out: God, be merciful to me a sinner. And me, Lord, crying out along with them: “Those who have sinned, be merciful to me, O God!” - accept and be generous, and forgive me the wickedness of my heart, I ask You. Not streams of water, but a stream of tears and bitter sighs I tenderly offer to You in prayer, and I ask: do not despise, O Lord, the source of my tears and the bitter illness of my heart, which consumes my soul, bones, and brains like fire. For for the sake of sinners and the wicked, You came down from heaven and suffered a painful death. You might be interested in: