About spiritual contrition

Two words “On spiritual contrition” were written by St. John Chrysostom at the request of the monks Demetrius and Stelechios, probably in Antioch after 372. They are devoted to the theme of true heartfelt contrition, necessary for spiritual growth. In the word “To Demetrius the Monk” (10 chapters), the saint laments that Christians have ceased to care about the soul, which is daily struck by carnal passions: “If someone from the outside came to us and knew well both the commandments of Christ and the disorder of our life, then I don’t know what other enemies of Christ he could imagine worse than us; because we are walking such a road as if we had decided to go against His commandments!” St. John examines in some detail how the commandments of Christ are violated, giving numerous examples. He calls to despise earthly goods and strive for heavenly ones, to love Christ with all your heart and fear being separated from Him, and speaks of the impossibility of combining bodily pleasures and spiritual contrition. In the word “To Stelechius” (7 chapters) St. John continues to develop the idea of ​​renouncing earthly pleasures (being, as it were, dead to the world) and the need to strive for the Kingdom of Heaven, fearing to lose it. The saint cites the example of the Apostle Paul, King David, calling for constant remembrance of sins and the Last Judgment: “When we think about the multitude of our previous sins, then we will recognize the excessiveness of God’s mercy, then we will bow our heads, then we will humble ourselves; because the more serious the sins of which we are guilty, the more we will repent.” *The title of the work in Greek is Περ κατανύξεως. *The title of the work in Latin is Ad Demetrium de compunctione (lib. 1), Ad Stelechium de compunctione (lib. 2). To Demetrius the monk * To Stelekhios Two words about spiritual contrition were written by St. John Chrysostom, at the request of the pious and those close to him, whose names appear in the title of these words, the monk Demetrius and Stelekhios, when he himself, after being ordained as a church reader of St. Meletius, Bishop of Antioch, settled in the monastery of monks who led an ascetic life on the mountains adjacent to Antioch, as is clearly stated in the first word (section 6) 1. Seeing that you, blessed Demetrius, constantly turn to us and with great zeal ask from us words of contrition, I always pleased (you) and was amazed at the purity of your soul; because it is impossible to desire such instructions without first being completely cleansed and without rising above everything in life. This is easy to see in those who are overwhelmed by such a desire, even for a short time: suddenly such a change occurs in them that they are immediately transported to heaven; Having detached the soul from worldly worries, as if from heavy bonds, they thus give it freedom to fly to its own place, akin to it. But with many people this usually happens rarely throughout their lives; and you, the divine head, are always, as I know, engulfed in this fire of contrition. And my witnesses to this can be (your) sleepless nights, and streams of tears, and the love for the desert, constantly living and thriving in your soul. What benefit will our words have to you? The very fact that you, having reached the very height (of virtue), place yourself along with those who go below, call your inspired soul (yours) stony and, constantly touching my right hand, kiss and say with tears: “Crush my hardened heart” - what kind of fear of God, what kind of fiery jealousy? So, if you want to awaken us who are sleeping by attracting us to this subject, then I approve of your great wisdom and care; but if you really mean yourself and think that you need a stimulus, then I don’t know how else you could convince us that you don’t need anything of ours. However, even at the same time, we will yield to you and obey out of respect and (your) boldness towards God, and zeal in asking, and friendship towards us; and you reward us for this with your prayers, so that we can properly arrange our lives in the future, and now say something good that can restore those who are lying down and strengthen and encourage weakened souls. Where do we start with this word? What foundation will we lay for it, what support? Isn’t it obvious that these are the words of Christ, in which He pronounces woe to those who laugh, and pleases those who weep, saying: “Blessed are those who mourn: for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4), and: “Woe... to those who laugh now: for you will mourn and weep” (Luke 6:25)? And this is very fair, because all real life is truly a time of crying and tears; such a misfortune has befallen the entire universe, such calamities have seized all people, that if anyone wants to recognize them exactly, if such accuracy is possible, he will not stop grieving and crying: everything has become so distorted and upset, and there is no trace of virtue anywhere! And what is even more difficult is that we ourselves do not feel, and we do not allow others to feel the disasters that have befallen us, but have become like a person whose body blossoms on the outside, but is destroyed inside by a strong fire; and by this insensibility we are not at all different from the insane, who without fear say and do many dangerous and obscene things, and not only are not ashamed, but even boast about it and consider themselves healthier than the healthy. Likewise, we, doing everything characteristic of the sick, do not even know that we are sick. Meanwhile, if even a small illness occurs in our body, we invite doctors, and spend money, and show patience, and do not stop doing everything until we stop the illness; but we do not care at all about the soul, which is daily struck by carnal passions, tormented, burned, thrown into the abyss and destroys itself in every possible way. The reason for this is that the disease has taken hold of everyone. Therefore, just as those who are sick in body, if someone healthy does not happen to be with them, can all easily be exposed to extreme danger because there is no one to turn them away from reckless desires, so with us, because there is no one completely healthy in the faith, but everyone is sick, some more, others less, no one is able to help those who are sick. So, if someone from the outside came to us and knew well both the commandments of Christ and the disorder of our life, then I don’t know what other enemies of Christ he could imagine worse than us; because we are walking such a road as if we had decided to go against His commandments! 2. And so that no one thinks that our words are exaggerated, I will try to present evidence, not from anything else, but from the very commandments of Christ. What does Christ say? “It was ordained to the ancients: Thou shalt not kill... But I tell you, that if anyone is angry with his brother in vain, he is guilty of judgment: whoever... says to his brother, cancer, is guilty of the host; This (said) Christ. And we, worse than those who do not believe in Him, trampled this law, every day showering our brothers with many slander. And what is especially funny is that, by avoiding the name “freak”, as if only this word is subject to punishment, we often inflict (our neighbor) other more serious insults. But in reality it is not so, but (the Lord) gave such a prohibition, threatening punishment for those who offend in general, as can be seen from the following words of Paul: “Do not flatter yourselves: neither harlots, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor harlots, nor sodomites, nor the covetous, nor thieves, nor drunkards, nor molesters, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God” ( 1 Corinthians 6:9–10). If he who calls his brother a freak is worthy of extreme punishment, then how much fire of hell will he prepare for himself who calls him a villain, and envious, and mad, and vain, and many other equally offensive words? The words “freak” and “cancer” are much easier to say now. Therefore, Christ, without mentioning them, only pointed out those, so that you would know that if the slightest slander exposes the one who spoke to hell, much more will more serious and intolerable ones do so. If some allow an exaggeration in what has been said (I know that some are inclined to think that this threat was spoken only in order to intimidate), then even the most fornicators, sodomists, malachis, and idolaters should be freed from the mentioned punishment. If (the apostle) made a threat to the slanderers only out of fear, then it is clear that the same is true for the rest; because he first put everyone together, and then added that they would be deprived of the Kingdom. Well, they will say, will the reviler really stand alongside the fornicator, and the wicked, and the covetous, and the idolater? Whether he will receive the same punishment will be discussed at another time; and that he, like them, will lose the Kingdom, in this I believe the words of Paul, or better to say, Christ who acted through him, i.e., that neither one nor the other will inherit the Kingdom of God. And not only regarding this, but also many other subjects, many are also disposed to think that what (in Scripture is spoken of as) having to be fulfilled is said in exaggeration. This is the devil's network. In order to destroy the fear of future punishment in people imbued with contrition for the love of God and make them less careful in obeying the commandment, (the devil) offered reassurance in the thought of exaggeration, which in this life is capable of deceiving careless souls, but will be exposed on the day of Judgment, when there will be no benefit from it. What benefit, tell me, is it now for those deceived to know this deception when repentance will not be of any use, namely at the resurrection? Let us not deceive ourselves in vain, let us not think falsely to harm ourselves and incur another punishment on ourselves - for unbelief. We are subjected to the most severe punishment not only by failure to fulfill the commandments of Christ, but also by disbelief in them; and unbelief comes from negligence about fulfilling the commandments. Precisely, when we do not want to acquire peace of mind by obedience (to the will of God) and to fulfill what is commanded to us, then, trying to distract the mind from fear for the future and drive away the great fear of threatening punishments, we, suppressed and tormented by our conscience, plunge ourselves into another abyss - we do not believe these punishments. Just as those possessed by a strong fever, even if they throw themselves into cold water, do not weaken the heat that suffocates them, but add even more fire to themselves; Likewise, we, wounded by the consciousness of our sins, force ourselves to plunge into the abyss (thoughts of) exaggeration, so that we can then fearlessly indulge in all our sins. We are not only angry with the brothers who are present, but we often also have a hostile attitude towards those who are absent: and this is the height of bitterness. From those who are higher and stronger than us, we very modestly endure both insults and insults, because we are afraid of them; and we harbor enmity towards equals and inferiors, even those who have not caused us any grief. So the fear of people acts (in us) more powerfully than the fear of Christ? 3. How can we hope for salvation, showing such carelessness and inattention? And why is this, tell me? What is difficult, what difficult does Christ require of us? “Do not be angry,” He says, “with your brother in vain.” And this is much easier than suffering unnecessary anger from another; there the substance for the fire is already ready, but here you yourself light the flame when there is no substance for it; Meanwhile, it makes no difference whether to endure and not get inflamed when another brings a candle, or to remain calm and unperturbed when no one is indignant. Whoever endures in the first case will provide evidence of the greatest wisdom; but whoever does the latter will not deserve surprise. So, when we, out of fear of people, doing more difficult things, do not want to do less difficult things out of fear of God, then think about the punishment and torment to which we expose ourselves. Moreover, consider as a brother not only someone of equal honor to you, not only a free man, but also a servant: “In Christ Jesus,” according to the Apostle, “there is neither slave nor free” (Gal. 3:28). Thus, we will be subject to the same punishment if we are angry in vain with slaves; because the slave is also a brother and has been awarded true freedom, having one (with us) spirit. Who can say about his life that it is free from reckless and vain slander and anger? Do not point out to me someone who indulges in this (vice) occasionally, but show me a person who would never indulge in it; and until you present this to us, until then you cannot reject the threat (contained in Scripture) under the pretext that this vice is not often indulged in. Likewise, a thief and a fornicator, even if they committed a sin only once, are not exempt from punishment because they did not commit this sin often, but are punished for the fact that they dared to do it at all. And what follows after this (in the Gospel) which of the unbelievers will not even consider it a fable, seeing with what persistence we violate this (command)? God said: “If you bring your gift to the altar and remember her, as if your brother has something for you: leave your gift before the altar, and go first to humble yourself with your brother, and then come and bring your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24). And we approach the altars, warring against each other both openly and secretly. God cares so much about our reconciliation that he allows his sacrifice to remain imperfect and his service to be interrupted, if only we would stop hostility towards each other and anger; and we pay so little attention to this that we nurture hostility for many days to our own destruction. Christ punishes not only those who are vindictive, but also those who, having freed themselves from this passion, neglect the brothers they insulted. Since it is common for the offended to remember evil, and the one who offends may not indulge in this passion: therefore (Christ) commands the latter to go to the former, showing that the one who gave the root of sin is subject to greater punishment than the former. And we are not admonished by this, but we insult our brothers even for small things; then, as if there was nothing bad, we ignore and forget those who have been offended by us, and let the hostility continue for a long time, not realizing that we will suffer the greater punishment the more days we allow hostility to continue - both for this very reason and because reconciliation later becomes more difficult for us. Just as when friendship binds us, nothing can easily create a rupture (between us) and even be accepted with confidence; so when enmity takes possession of our souls, those who want to quarrel with us for the most part easily and conveniently succeed in this, because then we do not believe the good, but believe only the bad. Therefore (the Lord) commands us, having left the gift before the altar, to reconcile with our brother in advance, so that we know that if at this time we should not postpone reconciliation, much less at other times. But we hold back external signs, but have retreated from the truth itself - before bringing a gift we greet each other, but for the most part we do this only with our tongues and lips. But the Lord does not want this, but rather that we give our neighbor a kiss from the soul and a greeting from the heart. This is a true greeting, otherwise it is a lie and pretense; and whoever kisses (his neighbor) in this way will rather anger than appease God. He demands from us sincere and strong friendship, and not the kind that often has the appearance and ghost (friendship) among us, but has completely lost its strength, which itself serves as proof of the lawlessness that prevails among us. “Because iniquity will increase,” says the Lord, “the love of many will fail” (Matthew 24:12). And we do this, people who are commanded not to be angry and not to have enemies, and if it happens to have someone, then only for a day: “Let not the sun,” says (the apostle), “let not go down on your anger” (Eph. 4:26). And we don’t stop there either; but we plot each other against each other, both in words and in deeds, gnawing and devouring our members, which is characteristic of obvious insanity; for by this we especially recognize those who suffer incurably from demons and madness. What can we say about the law regarding a rival, impure lust, shameless glances, crazy and disastrous love? Here the right eye and the right hand (Matthew 5:25–30) point us to nothing else but those who love us with harm (to us). And who hasn’t often violated and trampled on the law regarding divorce from wives (Matthew 5:32)? 4. I’m ashamed to even talk about laws against oaths, because they not only swear, but also break oaths all the time. If an oath, and in a just cause, is guilty and criminal, then where do we include the violation of an oath? If that which is beyond “yes” and “no” is from the evil one (Matthew 5:37), then to whom should we attribute that which exceeds this latter? Further, the Lord says: “If someone hits you on the right side of the cheek, give him the other one too: and whoever wants to sue you and take your robe, let him have the swearing too. And if anyone understands you by strength in one field, go with him two. Give to the one who asks you, and do not turn away the one who wants to borrow from you” (Matthew 5:39-42). What can you say to this? Regarding everything that has been said here, all that remains is to cry and close up (in shame): so we have deviated in the completely opposite direction, spending all our time on judgments and hostility, on feuds and quarrels, not enduring the slightest insult, either in deed or in words, but getting irritated over trifles. If you could point out those people who, having spent a lot on the poor, are then themselves, due to poverty, subjected to contempt and suffer many disasters, then you would count few of them, and even very few; but even among them you would not have shown us such a wise man as is depicted here: this last life (prescribed by Christ) is much more spiritual than the first; because it doesn’t matter whether you give voluntarily or endure when everything is taken away from you. What am I saying: reschedule? What Christ said contains much more than this. His Word so forbids the offended to be angry with those who have offended us, that we must not only not grieve over what has already been taken, but also give voluntarily what is left, and show a readiness to endure evil more than the passion of our enemies to do evil to us. So, when someone who wants to offend finds that the offended is ready to endure more than he wanted, and, having satisfied his passion, sees that the offended shows his generosity in abundance, he will walk away, defeated and disgraced by the superiority of patience; and, even if he were a beast, and even more ferocious than him, he will later become more modest, clearly seeing from the comparison both his anger and his virtue. This is the kind of life I am looking for now, the kind of life that is proposed in Scripture, but the kind of life that I cannot find anywhere in other places and in experience. Do not point out to me someone who is offended and suffers, for it happens that one endures out of powerlessness; but for one who, in relation to those of equal strength and to those on whom he could take revenge, would show patience, although not to such an extent as to surpass the passion of the enemy and give him more than he wanted, and by this voluntary concession of more would prove his generosity even regarding what was taken by force. But, what is even higher than this and what constitutes the very top (of virtue) - Christ commanded us to consider as friends, and close friends, those who do this to us and cause us harm in money, and in bodily health, and in everything else. Not only, He says, add to the predator and the covetous, but also love him with the strongest and most sincere love. This is precisely what He wanted to express when He said: “Pray for those who bring harm upon you” (Matthew 5:44; cf. Luke 6:28). We usually do this only for those whom we love very much. And so that you do not again consider these words to be an exaggeration and do not fall under the devil’s seduction, He gives proof and a solid reason for this: “If you love those who love you, what reward do you take? Don’t publicans do the same thing? And if you kiss... those who kiss you, what extra things are you doing? Don’t pagan women do the same?” (Matthew 5:46–47). If in this we are no different from publicans and pagans, then how can we not cry and lament? And if only this were evil! But now we are so far from loving our enemies that we turn away and hate even those who love (us); because to quarrel, to envy and to destroy their honor and good fame both in deeds and words is characteristic only of those who strongly hate and disgust. Thus, in this we are not only no different from the pagans, but we also turn out to be much worse than them. Christ commanded to pray for those who offend, and we are building forges; we are commanded to bless those who curse (Matthew 5:44), and we shower a thousand curses. What could be stronger than this contradiction and confrontation that we wage against the Lawgiver, acting contrary to all His commands? Not to mention the power of vanity, which He overthrew with subsequent words (Matthew 6:1-8), and we strengthened it by extending this power not only to prayers, fasting and almsgiving, but also to everything else, and subordinating ourselves to this insane passion worse than any slave - I don’t say, because it is clear to everyone; I will only say that some people, having given themselves over to extreme negligence, do not keep any commandments, while others, even if they want to partially obey them and try to fulfill some commandments, then they again fall into the same deficiency, not wanting to throw off the bonds of vanity. One does not give alms at all, and the other, although he gives some of his property to the needy, does it with vanity, and therefore turns out to be no better than the one who does not give. So the devil has completely entangled everyone in his nets! If anyone can avoid this shortcoming, then through foolishness he will again fall into the same or even greater sin; and will remain not only without benefit for himself from what he did, but also with causing himself some harm. I know many who help those in need not only for these reasons, but also out of friendship and out of pleasure, and for many other similar motives, and not out of the fear of God and not according to the commandment. So, when there are so many circumstances harmful to good deeds, which of those subject to these shortcomings will be easily saved? 5. And who can boldly pronounce the words: “Forgive us our debts, just as we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12)? If we do not take revenge on our enemies, then we do not heal the wound (inflicted on us). And Christ wants us not only to forgive, but also to accept our enemies as our first friends. Therefore, as I said above, He commanded to pray for them. If, although you do no harm (to the enemy), you nevertheless turn away from him, look at him with displeasure and keep the wound in your soul unhealed, then you have not yet fulfilled the commandment that Christ gave you. How can you ask God to be merciful (to you) when you yourself are not merciful to those who offend you? Laughing at this, one sage says: “A man retains anger against another, but seeks healing from the Lord? To have no mercy over a person like himself, but to pray for his sins? He himself is flesh and holds wrath: who will cleanse his sins?” (Sir.28:3-5). I would like to shut up and stop the speech at what has been said: it is so shameful and ashamed to continue further, because further speech will show even more clearly this struggle and irreconcilable hostility that we show against the commandments of Christ. But what is the use of our silence, when deeds cry out about this enmity, and even before the deeds, the One who will judge us clearly knows everything? The commandment is not to lay up for yourself “treasures on earth, but in heaven” (Matthew 6:19–20), although few are found to do it correctly; the rest, as if having heard the opposite commandment, as if having a command to gather up treasures on earth, left heaven and clung to everything earthly, collect wealth with mad passion and, having hated God, love mammon. As for the commandment: “Do not worry... in the morning” (Matthew 6:34), I do not know anyone who would listen and obey it, due to our lack of faith. Therefore, out of shame, I will pass this commandment in silence. Although one should believe Christ even then, as He simply declares; but now we do not believe Him, when He presented irrefutable evidence and gave examples, namely birds and grass; on the contrary, like the pagans, and even with greater cowardice than they, we are tormented by care (about earthly things), and for which we have not even received the command to pray, we exhaust all our care. Therefore, with shame, as I said, I will pass this commandment in silence and move on to the next one, see if I find there at least a little relief from my shame. What does (Christ) say after this? “Judge not, lest ye be judged” (Matthew 7:1). Here I thought I would find relief from my shame, but I see it increasing no less than from the previous one. Even if we had not committed any other sin, then this alone could lead us to the underworld of Gehenna: so we strictly condemn the sins of others, but we do not see beams in our own eyes (Matthew 7:3); So we spend our whole lives investigating and judging the affairs of others! And it will not be long before you find, both among the laity and among the monks and clergy, someone who would be free from this sin, despite the following threat relating to it: “By whom you judge, you will be judged; and if you measure accordingly, it will be measured back to you” (Matthew 7:2). And yet, despite the fact that this sin subjects us to such punishment and does not give us any pleasure, we all run towards evil, as if trying and competing to enter the cave of Gehenna not by one, but by many roads. We sin equally not only in relation to the more difficult ones, but also in relation to the easiest (commandments); violating both these and those equally, and by committing the easiest crimes we prove that we do not fulfill even the most difficult ones due to our negligence, and not due to the difficulty of the commandments themselves. So, tell me, what kind of work is it not to inquire into other people’s affairs and not to judge the sins of one’s neighbor? On the contrary, work is needed to scout and judge others. Who, having heard this, will ever believe us that we came to the point of violating (the commandments) through carelessness, and not with intention or desire? When what (the Lord) commands to do is easy and convenient for those who want to do it, on the contrary, what He forbids is more difficult and difficult, and we, omitting what is commanded, do what is forbidden, can’t our enemies say that we are sinning by wanting to resist Him? And that the commandments of Christ have nothing difficult in themselves, He Himself explained this in the words: “Take My yoke upon you...: for My yoke is easy, and My burden is light” (Matthew 11:29-30). But we, through inexplicable carelessness, do what seems easy to many and difficult. Whoever wants to do nothing and always sleep, of course, finds it difficult to eat and drink; on the contrary, vigilant and cheerful people do not shy away from very wondrous and difficult tasks, but approach them with greater courage than careless and drowsy people do very easy ones. No, there is definitely nothing easy that great laziness does not present to us as very difficult and difficult; just as there is nothing difficult or difficult that zeal and zeal do not make very easy. What, tell me, could be more difficult than enduring dangers threatening death every day? However, Blessed Paul called this easy, saying this: “For even though sorrow now is light, yet, as we increase in success, it brings to us the burden of eternal glory” (2 Cor. 4:17). And what is difficult in itself becomes easy because of hope for the future; Paul himself gave this (reason), saying: “We do not see those who are visible, but those who are invisible” (2 Cor. 4:18). 6. Let's see further. “You shall not,” says Christ, “let the holy dog ​​cast your pearls before swine” (Matthew 7:6). Christ gave this commandment as a command, and we, out of vanity and unreasonable friendliness, violated this command too, allowing depraved people, unbelievers and filled with many vices into the communion of the Sacraments, simply and without investigation; Before an exact inquiry into their character, we reveal to them the entire teaching of dogmas and immediately introduce into the sanctuary those who cannot yet see even the vestibule. Therefore, some of those initiated in this way, soon becoming apostates, did a lot of evil. And we violate this very terrible commandment not only in relation to others, but even in relation to ourselves, when, having the need to partake of the immortal Mysteries, we often do this with our inherent impurity and shamelessness. And not only are these commandments completely violated by everyone, but, as it turns out, the subsequent ones are also violated. Thus, Christ said: “Whatever... whatever you want, let men do to you, so do you to them” (Matthew 7:12). And we do (to others) everything that we ourselves do not want to tolerate; and, having the command to enter (into the Kingdom of Heaven) “by the strait gate” (Matthew 7:13), we seek everywhere the wide one. And that some of the laity desire and covet such a gate is not very surprising; but that men, who, apparently, were crucified (to the world), seek them more than the laity, this is amazing, even like a mystery. From almost all monks, if you invite them to any business, you will immediately hear, first of all, questions in the following words: can they find peace, can the inviter calm them down; The word is constantly repeated: “peace”. What are you saying, man? You have been commanded to walk a narrow path, but you ask for peace? You are commanded to enter through the narrow gate, but you seek the wide one? What could be worse than such a perversion of the matter? And so that you don’t think that I’m now saying this to condemn others, I’ll tell you about myself. When I recently decided, leaving the city, to go to the monks’ cells, I thought a lot and worried about where I would get the necessities from and whether it would be possible to eat bread freshly baked that same day; Will they not force me to use the same oil both in the lamp and in my food, will I not be forced to eat miserable vegetables, will I be sent to hard work, ordered, for example, to chop or carry wood, carry water and perform all other such services? And in general, I had a lot of concern for (my) peace. Meanwhile, people who take over the positions of leaders and management of public affairs do not care at all about this (peace), but only about whether the matter will have benefits, temporary benefits; and if they can hope for this, then they no longer think about labor, nor about dangers, nor about disgrace, nor about humiliating work, nor about long journeys, nor about life in a foreign land, nor about grief, nor about torment, nor about changes in circumstances, nor about the possibility of complete failure of hopes, nor about untimely death, nor about separation from relatives, nor about the loneliness of wife and children, nor about any other trouble; but intoxicated by the passion for money, they endure everything through which they hope to satisfy it. And we, who are destined not for money or earth, but for heaven and heavenly blessings, “which no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man has dreamed of” (1 Cor. 2:9), we ask about peace? So we are more pitiful and weak than them! What are you saying, man? You intend to go to Heaven and receive the Kingdom there, and - you ask if there is any difficulty on this path and in this journey, are you not ashamed, do not blush and do not run to hide underground? Even if there were all human disasters, slander, insults, dishonor, slander, sword, fire, iron, animals, drownings, hunger, illness, and in general all the troubles that happen in life from the beginning until now, won’t you laugh, tell me, and won’t you despise all this? Would you even think about it? What would be more stupid, lower and more pitiful than such a soul? One who is overwhelmed by the desire for heavenly things should not, I do not say, seek (bodily) peace, but also enjoy it when it is available. Isn’t it strange that, while those who love with impure love are so completely devoted to their beloved that apart from them and being with them, they find nothing pleasant in the other pleasures of this life, no matter how many there are, we, embraced not by any impure, but by the most sublime love, not only do not neglect peace when we have it, but also seek it when it is not there? 7. No one else, beloved, has been possessed by the desire for heavenly blessings, as it should be; otherwise he would consider everything that (now) seems difficult to be a shadow and a mockery. Thus, whoever is carried away by the present will never be worthy of seeing future benefits; and whoever despises what is here and considers everything no better than a shadow and a dream, will soon receive those great and spiritual benefits. And if someone really has this good (mood), then it will have the same power as fire in a thorn bush; and even though (such a person) was oppressed by many evils, even though many ropes of sins entangled him, even though the flame of lust burned strongly in him and the great confusion of everyday affairs surrounded him, this (desire for heavenly blessings), as if with a strong whip, will completely dispel all this and remove it from the soul. Just as light dust cannot withstand the pressure of a strong wind, so many unclean desires cannot withstand the force of destruction rushing against them, but disappears and dissipates faster than any dust and smoke. If carnal love so enslaves the soul that it distracts it from everything and subordinates it to the influence of one beloved, then what will not love for Christ and the fear of being separated from Him do? Just as it is difficult and even impossible to mix fire with water, so, I think, it is impossible to combine pleasure (of earthly goods) with contrition; because they are opposite and mutually exclusive. One is the mother of tears and sobriety, and the other of laughter and excess; one makes the soul light and inspired, and the other brings it into a state heavier than any lead. And I will try to prove this not with my words, but with the one who himself was embraced by this beautiful love. Who is this? An ardent lover of Christ, Paul, who was so wounded by this love that he even groaned about the slowness and duration of his wandering here: “For we who are in this body,” he says, “we groan” (2 Cor. 5:4); however, he was ready and willing to remain here for Christ: “and it is most necessary for me to remain in the flesh,” he says, “for your sake” (Phil. 1:24), that is, in order for faith in Christ to spread. Therefore, he endured hunger, and thirst, and nakedness, and bonds, and (the dangers of) death, and sea voyages, and shipwrecks, and all other troubles that he himself had counted; and not only was he not burdened by them, but he also rejoiced, and the reason for this was the love of Christ. That’s why he said: “In all these we overcome because we love them” (Rom. 8:37). And don’t be surprised by this: if human love has often prompted one to decide to die, then what won’t the love of Christ do? Which one will not ease the difficulties? So everything was easy for him, because he looked only at his beloved (Christ), and for Him he considered enduring everything above any pleasure and enjoyment, which is indeed so. He didn’t even think that he was on earth, in real life, and dealing with people; but as if he already had a heavenly lot, dwelt with the Angels, received the Kingdom and enjoyed (the contemplation of God) face to face, therefore he despised both the joys and sorrows of this life, and did not care at all about the peace that we constantly seek, but exclaimed like this: “Until this present hour, we hunger, and thirst, and are naked, and suffer, and wander, and toil, working with our own hands. We rebuke, we bless; persecute, endure; blaspheme, let us be consoled." And again: “Like the rabble of the world, everything has been trampled underfoot until now” (1 Cor. 4:11, 13). Having turned the eyes of his soul to Heaven and clinging to the beauty there, he did not want to return to earth again; but like a poor man and a beggar, who was always hiding in a dark and low hut, seeing the king shining with gold and rays of stones, he will no longer want to even think about his poor home, but will try in every possible way to move to another home, if possible; So the blessed one (Paul), having seen the heavenly blessings, looked with disdain at the local poverty and, out of necessity, physically dealing with people, did not cleave to anything here, but completely moved to that (Heavenly) City. And what am I saying about the sorrows of real life? The love of Christ inspired him so much that if he had to endure eternal punishment for Christ, he would never have refused this either, because he served Christ differently than we (serve) mercenaries, fearing Gehenna and desiring the Kingdom. Having been embraced by some other, incomparably better and more blissful love, he endured and did everything for nothing other than to satisfy the love that he had for Christ and which so took possession of his mind that he would willingly part with what was most dear to him - i.e. being with Christ - for which he neglected both Gehenna and the Kingdom of Heaven, deciding for Christ to meet and with great readiness to accept, as one of the most desirable blessings, even this inexpressible excommunication (from Christ for the Israelites. - Rom. 9:3). 8. What I have said now may seem unclear to many; and when I say the same thing more clearly, then it will again seem incredible to those to whom it was not clear before. And this is not at all surprising; the blessed one (Paul), expecting that they would not believe him in this, first said: “I speak the truth about Christ, I do not lie, my conscience obeying me through the Holy Spirit” (Rom. 9:1). However, despite the fact that he added such words to his saying and called such witnesses to his conscience, they still do not believe him. What exactly is he saying? Listen. After speaking about the disasters in this world, saying: “Who will separate us from the love of Christ, be it tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or trouble, or sword” (Rom. 8:35), and having listed everything that is on earth, he ascends to Heaven and, wanting to show that it is not a great thing for Christ to neglect the punishments here, he added: “For... neither angels nor The beginnings below the Power, neither the present nor the future, nor the height, nor the depth, nor any other creature, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Rom. 8:38-39). The meaning of his words is this: not only people will not be able to distract me from this love, but also Angels, and even if all the Heavenly Forces gather together, they will not be able to do this. What am I saying? Even if it were necessary for Christ to lose the Kingdom or fall into Gehenna, I am not afraid of that. This, and nothing else, is what the words mean: height and depth, and life and death. And he said this not because the Angels would begin to strive to separate him from Christ; but he verbally assumes something that can never be, in order to depict and explain to everyone his great love. This is the property of those who love: they cannot remain silent about their love, but they reveal their flame in front of all their neighbors, with a continuous conversation about the superiority of love, calming their soul. This is what the blessed one (Paul) did: having embraced in words everything that is and what will be, what happens and what will never happen, visible and invisible, every punishment and every joy, he, as if this was not enough for him to express his feelings, presupposed and expressed in words the same number of other non-existent objects (the expression “other creation” refers to these non-existent objects), thus showing that from all that was said nothing could separate him from the love of God, “even in Christ Jesus our Lord.” He raised his love to such a height (Paul); and we, who have received the command to imitate him (1 Cor. 9:1), do not complacently endure the sorrows here, but we complain and murmur no less than those overcome by fever. This prolonged illness, which has gripped our souls, has become, so to speak, incurable due to its duration, and we cannot even think about perfect health, the restoration of which seems impossible to us. And if we hear that someone points to the apostles and talks about their exploits, instead of immediately crying for ourselves that we are so behind them, we do not consider this (backwardness) a sin, but we behave as if it is impossible to rise to such a height. And if anyone asks about the reason, we immediately present such an unreasonable excuse: it was Paul, then it was Peter, then John. What does it mean: it was Paul, it was Peter? Tell me, didn’t they also have the same nature? Didn't they come into life the same way as we do? Didn't they eat the same food? Wasn't that the same air they breathed? Weren't they using the same things? Didn’t some of them have wives and children, others even have worldly crafts, and others didn’t even fall into the very abyss of evil? But they, someone will say, enjoyed the great grace of God! Thus, if we were commanded to raise the dead, or open the eyes of the blind, or cleanse lepers, or correct the lame, or cast out demons and heal other similar diseases: then such our justification would be appropriate. But if strictness of life and expression of obedience (to the law of Christ) are now required, then how does such justification come about? And at baptism you received the grace of God and became a partaker of the Spirit, if not so much as to work miracles, then as much as you need to have for a correct and well-ordered life; Thus, our corruption comes solely from our carelessness. And Christ on that day (of Judgment) will give rewards not to those who only performed miracles, but to those who fulfilled His commandments. “Come,” He will say, “with the blessing of My Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world,” not because you performed miracles, but because “you were hungry... and you gave Me food: you were thirsty, and you drank Me: I was strange, and you knew Me: naked, and you clothed Me: I was sick, and you visited Me: in escape the prison, and come to Me” (Matthew 25:34–36). And in the teaching about the beatitudes, He nowhere mentions those who do miracles, but only those who lead a righteous life (Matthew 5:3-12). 9 . So, although grace has now diminished, this cannot harm us in the least, but will not serve to justify us when we give an account of our deeds. And we marvel at those blessed (apostles) not for their miracles, because miracles depended entirely on the power of God, but because they showed angelic life; and this life, with the highest help, is a matter of their own zeal. It’s not me who is saying this now, but the imitator of Christ himself (Paul). When in his letter to his disciples he refuted the false apostles and wanted to show the difference between pure and unclean service, he pointed not to miracles, but to his exploits, with the following words: “Are they servants of Christ? I speak not in wisdom, but rather. In labors you are multiplied, in wounds you are sore, in prisons you are overflowing, in deaths you are many. From the Jews five times fourty or one received. I hit them with clubs, I lashed them with a single stone, I thrashed the ship three times, I created night and day in the depths. In the traveling processions there are many: troubles in the rivers, troubles from robbers, troubles from relatives, troubles from the tongue, troubles in the city, troubles in the desert, troubles in the sea, troubles in false brethren. In labor, in labor, in vigils in abundance, in hunger and thirst, in fasting in abundance, in winter and nakedness. In addition to external ones, an attack on the hedgehog all the days, and care for all churches. Who faints, and I do not faint? Who is tempted, and I am not relieved?” ( 2 Cor. 11:23–29 )? For this I am surprised at the apostles; and without this, those who received the power of miracles through God’s economy would not only not deserve surprise, but would even become rejected, as Christ shows when he says: “Many people will say to Me in that day: Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, and in Your name we have cast out demons, and in Your name we have created many mighty powers? And he said to them, “Get thee away from Me, all you that do iniquity: I have never known you” (Matthew 7:22–23). Therefore, He inspired the disciples: “Do not rejoice, for the demons obey you: rejoice, for your names are written in heaven” (Luke 10:20). A righteous life will receive crowns without miracles and then will not lose anything; and a lawless life with miracles cannot escape punishment. So, the justification we have said is inappropriate, and not only inappropriate, but even dangerous, and for many heretics it serves as a pretext. If the apostles became so wondrous not by their own will, but only by the grace of Christ, then what prevents everyone from becoming the same? Grace, if it did not demand in advance what depends on us, would suddenly pour out into the souls of everyone, because with God there is no partiality; and since it also requires what is dependent on us, it follows some and remains in them, moves away from others, and does not come to others at all. And that even before the blessed (Paul) did something wondrous, God, having first learned his disposition, had already given him grace, learn from what He says about him: “This vessel is chosen by Me, to bear My name before the nations and kings and all the generation of Israel” (Acts 9:15). Thus He who searches our hearts testified when (Paul) did not yet have grace. Let us not, beloved, deceive ourselves and say that it is impossible for anyone to be like Paul. There will, of course, never be another Paul, by grace and miracles, but by strict life, anyone who wants can be like that; and if there are no such people, it is only because they don’t want to. However, I don’t know how I came to such foolishness that I look for people like Paul among today’s people, when I cannot see those who would be like the third or fourth after him. One must grieve about this, and cry, and sob, not just one or two days, but for the rest of one’s life; because whoever brings himself into such a state will not soon sin later. If you don’t believe these words, then look at those who are crying, precisely with worldly crying, and not from among the simple ones leading a working life, but from among those pampered people who know nothing but pleasures. And these people, who are devoted to drunkenness and gluttony, continue lunches until the evening and dinners until midnight, take away what belongs to others, do not spare the widow, the poor, or the weak, and show great cruelty when they are overwhelmed by intense grief, which can outrage and agitate the soul to the depths, reject all voluptuous and criminal wishes and turn to a wise life, distinguished by strict behavior, cheerfulness, prostrations, patience, fasting, silence, modesty, humility and great love for mankind. Those who took away someone else’s property are now ready to willingly give up their own; and even if someone puts fire under their house with all its property, they will not be angry. I know many of whom, after the loss of their loved ones, leaving the city and its amenities, settled in villages, while others built themselves houses near the graves of the deceased and ended their lives there. But more on that later. While their sadness is in force, they do not care at all about the present, but that insane passion with which they strove to save and accumulate money and acquire power and glory among the people, burned by the fire of sorrow, like grass or the flower of grass, is expelled from the soul; and their mind is then filled with such philosophy that it is unpleasant for them to even talk about the pleasures of real life; but everything that previously seemed to them to bring pleasure now seems disgusting and very bitter, and none of the servants and friends will then dare to say a word about worldly affairs, even very necessary ones; everything is left without attention and gives way to conversations about wisdom, because then through grief, as if in some sacred place, the soul learns the insignificance of human nature, the short duration of real life, the corruption and impermanence of everyday things, the deceitfulness of what is done in disgrace (the world). Then (appears) great contempt for money, then anger is destroyed, then ambition is abandoned, and neither envy can dwell nor pride rage in one crushed by sorrow, and lust does not kindle the voluptuous; but, after all this is removed from the heart, one thought settles in it, constantly representing the image of the deceased. This image (for him) is food, and drink, and sleep, and pleasure, and peace, and great joy; this (for him) is fame, and wealth, and power, and pleasure. 10. So we too, to say nothing more, should mourn the negligence of our salvation; with such love and readiness everyone should direct the eyes of their souls there and constantly remember and imagine it. While those who have lost their children and wives do not occupy their minds with anything other than the idea of ​​those who have departed from them, we, who have lost the Kingdom of Heaven, think about everything more than about it. None of those, even if they were of royal family, are ashamed of ordinary sadness; but he will sit on the ground, and cry bitterly, and change his clothes, and with great readiness submit to all the other demands of such grief; will not think about his upbringing, nor about the condition of his body, nor about possible illnesses from exhaustion, but he will endure everything very easily; This, and even greater, patience is shown not only by husbands, but also by wives, no matter how weak they are. And we, mourning not children, not wives, but the death of the soul, not someone else’s soul, but our own, feigningly refer to the weakness of the body and the tenderness of upbringing. And if only evil were limited to this! But now we don’t do anything for which we don’t need any bodily strength. So, tell me, what is the need for bodily strength when you need to crush your heart, pray soberly and cheerfully, think about your sins, put down pride and arrogance, and humble your mind? This is what appeases God to us without requiring much work; and we don’t do that either. To cry (for the soul) means not only to put on sackcloth, lock yourself in a cell and sit in the dark, but to constantly remember your sins and torment your conscience with these thoughts, to constantly measure the space of the path by which we are separated from the Kingdom of Heaven. How, they will say, can this be? How? If we always have before our eyes Gehenna and the Angels, who during the (Judgment) will disperse everywhere and gather from the entire universe those who will be taken to Gehenna; if we begin to think about how great the punishment is, even without Gehenna, to be deprived of the Kingdom. Truly, even if that fire had not threatened us and eternal punishment had not awaited us, then one separation from the Meek and Humane Christ, who gave Himself up to death for us and endured everything in order to deliver from that torment and reconcile us with His Father, who were His enemies through sins - this alone, even if we were not deprived of the ineffable and eternal blessings set before us, is greater than any punishment in the state and to awaken souls and dispose them to constant vigilance. If we, just reading the example of the five virgins who were separated from the bridal chamber due to lack of oil (Matt. 25:8-12), grieve over their misfortune along with themselves and are embarrassed, then at the mere thought that we ourselves will suffer the same for carelessness, who (of us) will be so stony as to, constantly having this example in our soul, indulge in negligence? It would be possible to spread the word more, but since it was spoken by us only out of obedience, and not because of any other need, then what was written was more than was required. I know well that you yourself strictly maintain the entire virtue of contrition and could, even silently, teach it to others if they wished to live with your piety even for a short time and see your life on the cross. So, if our contemporaries need to learn contrition, they should go to your home, and descendants should listen about your deeds; I think a great guide to this will be provided by one story about your life. Therefore, I ask and beg you, finally, to reward us and repay us with your prayers, so that I can not only talk about contrition, but also show it with deeds; because teaching without work not only does not bring any benefit, but even brings great harm and condemnation to those who spend their lives in such carelessness. “Not everyone,” says (the Lord), “says to Me: Lord, Lord, but whoever does and teaches, this one will be called great in the Kingdom of Heaven” (Matthew 5:19; cf. Matthew 7:21). 1. How is it possible for what you, holy man of God, Stelechius, ordered? How can words of contrition come from a soul so weak and cold? Whoever intends to say something good about this subject needs, I think, to be more inflamed himself, before anyone else, and to burn with such jealousy that the words he utters about this, stronger than hot iron, cut into the soul of the listeners. But we don’t have this fire, but everything inside is dust and ashes. How, tell me, how can we light this flame when we have neither a spark, nor a substance added, nor a wind that would flow in and fan this flame, due to the great darkness that has been spread over our soul by a multitude of sins? I don't know. Let you, who gave the order, also say how this order can go into action and receive proper execution. We will offer our tongue as a service, and you pray to the One who heals the broken-hearted, who gives long-suffering to the faint-hearted, who raises up the poor from the earth, so that He kindles in us that fire that usually destroys all human weakness, destroys all drowsiness, carelessness and coarseness of the flesh, directs the flight of the soul to heaven, and from that vault (heavenly), as if from what sublime peak, shows all the vanity and deceitfulness of real life. And whoever cannot fly there and sit at this height, it is impossible for him to see properly either the earth or what is happening on the earth. Since (here) there is a lot that darkens the sight, a lot that disturbs the ear and restrains the tongue; then it is necessary, having avoided all noise and smoke, to retire to that desert, where there is great silence and pure clarity, and no noise, where the eyes are intently and unswervingly directed towards the contemplation of the love of God, and the ear is calmly devoted to one occupation - listening to the Word of God and attention to that harmonious and spiritual harmony, the power of which, once captivating the soul, so takes possession of it that (a person) carried away by this melody, reluctantly accepts food, drink, and sleep. Therefore, this power cannot be weakened by either the confusion of everyday affairs or the pressure of many carnal desires. The rising noise of the storm occurring below does not reach this spiritual height; but, as those who have ascended to the tops of the mountains can no longer hear or see anything that is done or said in the city, but hear some kind of vague and unpleasant noise, which is no better than the buzzing of wasps; so those who have withdrawn from everyday things and have flown to the heights of spiritual wisdom do not feel anything of ours; because while the soul revolves on earth, the body and bodily senses surround it with countless chains, collecting a terrible storm of transient pleasures from all sides: hearing, sight, touch, smell, and language, bringing into it from the outside a multitude of evils. But when it soars and indulges in the pursuit of spiritual objects, it blocks the entrance to sinful dreams, not closing off the senses, but directing their activity to the same height. Like a formidable and strict mistress, having begun to prepare a heterogeneous, heavy and precious ointment, and needing many working hands for this, she wakes up her maids and, bringing them to her, orders one to select the not yet prepared aromas into a sieve, the other to take the steelyard and scales and watch carefully so that less or more of them are not included than is required and through this the proportionality of the prepared composition is not violated; He orders one to cook what is needed, another to rub what is not good (rubbed), and a third to combine and mix some substances with others, one to stand with a jug, another with another vessel, and a third to hold something else, and thus tying both their mind and their hands to the task, does not allow anything to spoil, carefully watching over everything and not allowing the eyes to wander and be entertained by external objects: so is the soul, preparing this precious color, that is, contrition, turns the feelings towards itself and stops their distraction. And if it happens to her, having gathered to herself, to reflect on something righteous and pleasing to God, she immediately forces her feelings to stop their activity, so that they do not introduce something unnecessary into her at the wrong time, and thereby disturb her inner silence. Therefore, although sounds are transmitted to the ear, and visible objects to the sight, not one of them penetrates inside, since the activity of each of these members is directed to the soul. And what do I say about sounds and visible objects, when many of those who were in such a state did not feel not only that others passed before their eyes, but even that they were struck? Such is spiritual virtue that it is easy for someone who wishes, being on earth, but as if sitting in heaven, not to feel anything happening on earth. 2. Such was Blessed Paul; rotating among the cities, he was as far from everything present as we are from dead bodies. So, when he says: “The world is crucified to me” (Gal. 6:14), he means this insensitivity (to earthly things), and not even this one, but also another similar one, so that it was twofold in him. He didn’t just say: “The world will be crucified to me,” but he fell silent; but with subsequent words he pointed to another (insensitivity), saying: “and to the world.” There is great wisdom in considering the world to be dead; but even greater and much more important is to be as if dead for him. So, Paul's saying means the following: he, according to him, was far from the present not as much as the living are from the dead, but as much as the dead are from the dead. The living, of course, has no passion for the deceased, but he has some other feeling - either he is surprised at the beauty of the deceased, or he regrets and cries for him; and a dead person does not have such a feeling or disposition towards a dead person. Wanting to express this, he added to the words: “the world will be crucified to me”: “and to the world.” Do you see how far he was from the universe, how, walking on earth, he reached the very heights of heaven? Don’t tell me about mountain peaks, about forests, about valleys and impenetrable desert: they alone are not enough to free the soul from the noise (worldly), but what is needed is the flame that Christ kindled in the soul of Paul and was supported by the blessed one with a spiritual thought, and raised to such a height that this flame, starting from below - from the earth, reached to the very sky, and to the highest heaven, to the very highest - for he himself was caught up “to the third heaven” ( 2 Cor.12:2); but his affection and love for Christ extended beyond not only three, but all heavens. He was small in body and not at all taller than us; but by his disposition he rose excessively above all the people existing on earth. And he would not have sinned who would have imagined the state of this saint in this way: as if some flame, having embraced the surface of the entire earth and rising upward, passed through the vault of heaven on all sides and, running through the air lying above it - whether it was air or something else - filled with fire the middle between the two heavens, and here it did not stop its flow, but, suddenly rushing, rose to the third heaven and made everything with one fire, the breadth of which equal to the space of the entire earth, and the height to the distance of the third heaven from us. However, even in this way, it seems, I did not portray the slightest part of his love. And that these words are not exaggerated, anyone can find out for sure by reading what we wrote about this subject to Demetrius. This is how one should love Christ, and this is how one should renounce the present. Such were the souls of the holy prophets; that is why they received other eyes. To detach themselves from the present was a matter of their own diligence; and that later other eyes were opened for them to contemplate the future, this was already a matter of God’s grace. Such was Elisha: since he distanced himself from everything worldly, loved the Kingdom of Heaven and despised everything real, that is, kingdom and power, and glory and universal respect; then I saw something that no one had ever seen - a whole mountain, covered with a formation of fiery horses and the same chariots and warriors (2 Kings 6:17). He who is seduced by the present will never be worthy to contemplate the future; and whoever neglects what is here and considers it no better than a shadow and a dream will soon receive great and spiritual benefits. Likewise, we reveal the wealth that belongs to husbands to our children when we see that they have become husbands and neglect everything childish; but while they are seduced by the latter, we consider them unworthy of the former. A soul that has not learned to neglect the unimportant and worldly will not be able to contemplate the heavenly, just as the one contemplating the latter cannot help but laugh at the former. Blessed Paul also said this; although his words refer to dogmas, however, they can be applied to morals and talents, namely: “A spiritual man does not receive even the Spirit of God” (1 Cor. 2:14). 3. So, we, as I said, must look for desert dwelling not only in some places, but also in the will itself, and above all else - to lead our souls into the most uninhabited (desert). With this arrangement, blessed David, who lived in the city, ruled the kingdom and was burdened with countless worries, was embraced by the love of Christ stronger than those who lived in the deserts. Such tears, sighs and sobs, day and night, are unlikely to be seen in any of those now crucified (for the world), if only such a person really exists. At the same time, we must not only pay attention to the tears, but also delve into who shed them; because it doesn’t matter whether someone invested with (royal) dignity, revered by everyone and not subject to anyone’s reproaches, humbles himself, humiliates himself and exhausts himself, or does the same thing if he has nothing of the kind. There are many things that cause the king to relax and prevent him from gathering his courage. He relaxes and becomes pampered from daily luxury, and is puffed up with power and carried away to pride; he is inflamed by the love of glory, and no less by carnal love, born of power and nourished by luxury. In addition, the whirlwinds of worries rushing at him from all sides disturb his soul no less than those passions, and therefore contrition, encountering so many obstacles, cannot find access (to him); for even a soul free from all this can hardly implant this good in itself. But a private person, unless he is extremely depraved, is alien to all this confusion; therefore he can surrender (to contrition) with less inconvenience than one who enjoys such power, authority and honor. Just as it is difficult and even impossible to mix fire with water, I think it is impossible to combine pleasure (earthly goods) with contrition, because they are opposite and incompatible with each other. One is the mother of tears and sobriety, and the other of laughter and excess; one makes the soul light and inspired, and the other brings it into a state that is heavier than any lead. But I have not yet said the most important thing, that (David) lived in those times when special strictness in lifestyle was not required; and we began the feat when great punishment is imposed not only for other sins, but also for laughter, and, on the contrary, crying and sorrow are constantly approved. However, this blessed one, having destroyed all obstacles, indulged in contrition as much as if he were one of the simple people and had never seen, even in a dream, either a kingdom or royal splendor; and in purple, and in a diadem, and on the royal throne, he showed the same contrition as he who sat in sackcloth, on ashes and in the desert. Whoever really has this good mood, it has the same power as fire in a thorn bush, and even though (such a person) is oppressed by many evils, even if many ropes of sins entangle him, even if the flame of lust burns strongly in him and the great confusion of everyday affairs surrounds him, this (contrition), as if with a strong scourge, will completely dispel all this and remove it from the soul. Just as light dust cannot withstand the pressure of a strong wind, so a multitude of lusts cannot withstand the force of destruction rushing at them, but disappears and dissipates faster than all dust and smoke. If carnal love so enslaves the soul that it distracts it from everything and subordinates it to the influence of one beloved, then what will not love for Christ and the fear of being separated from Him do? Both of these worried the soul of the prophet so much that he sometimes said: “In the same way that the trees desire the springs of water, so my soul desires thee for You, O God” (Ps. 41:2); and again: “My soul is like a waterless land to You” (Ps. 142:6); and: “my soul cleaves to You” (Ps. 62:9); and sometimes: “Lord, do not reprove me with Your wrath; do not rebuke me with Your wrath” (Ps. 6:2). 4. Let no one tell me that David wrote this (sixth) psalm to lament his sin. This is not true; and the inscription made at the top (of the psalm) does not allow such an assumption. If the content (of the psalm) could not be indicated in the inscription, then one could, if desired, apply this psalm to the circumstances of that sin; but when (another) psalm is known, spoken on these circumstances, and the real psalm has a different content, then, I ask, let us not bring the Divine into disorder and attach more importance to our own judgments than to the dogmas spoken by the Spirit. What is the inscription (6th Psalm)? “About osmosis,” says (David). What kind of eighth (day) is this, if not that day of the Lord, great and glorious, like a burning furnace, which will make the powers on high tremble (“and the powers of heaven,” it is said, “will move.” - [Matthew 24:29]), and will bring out the fire that precedes the King (Christ)? He called this day the eighth, indicating a change in the (present) state and a renewal of the future life. Real life is nothing more than one week: it begins on the first day, and ends on the seventh: and then again revolves within the same limits, ascending to the same beginning and descending to the (same) end. Therefore, no one would call the Lord's Day (Sunday) the eighth, but the first; because the circle of the week does not extend to the number eight. When everything present ceases and is destroyed, then the course of the eighth day will begin; it will not return to the beginning, but will rush into further spaces. So, the prophet, out of strong contrition, always had in his mind the (last) Judgment, among such honor and pleasures, he constantly saw before him that day, which we barely remember in sorrows, and, constantly reflecting on the destinies of God, he wrote this psalm. What is he saying? “Lord, do not reprove me with Your wrath, but punish me with Your wrath,” calling the great power of punishment rage and anger (he knew that God is free from all passion), although he recognized himself as worthy not of torment and punishment, but of honor and crowns. His faith, with which he overthrew the tower of the foreigners (Goliath) and plucked out the entire Jewish people from the very gates of death, and the good deed he showed not once, not twice, but many times over to his persecutor (Saul), and before that, the sentence about him pronounced by God himself, sufficiently demonstrate the valor of this man more than his very merits. Deeds (of man), no matter how great and wondrous, may nevertheless be suspected of depravity, although the merits of this righteous man (David) are for the most part free from any suspicion. But when God testifies, then the verdict is not subject to any suspicion; and if David had not presented the surest proof of his valor, he would not have received heavenly testimony. What does God say about him? “I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after My own heart” (Acts 13:22; cf. 1 Samuel 13:14). And yet, after such a judgment (of God) and after such deeds (of his own), he uttered words characteristic of those condemned and without any boldness before God, fulfilling the Gospel (command): “When you have done all things ..., say, as we are unbreakable servants” (Luke 17:10). What more did that tax collector, truly filled with many sins, say, who did not dare to look at heaven, or utter many words, or stand near the Pharisee? This one reviled him, saying: “I am not, like other men, predators, unrighteous, adulterers, or like this publican” (Luke 18:11); and he accepted his words as if he had not heard anything offensive, and not only was not indignant, but also honored the insulter and proud man with such honor that he recognized himself as unworthy of the land that he trampled; did not say anything except confession of his sins and, striking himself hard on the chest, fervently prayed to God to be merciful to him. However, it is not at all surprising that he acted this way, because a multitude of sins forced him, willingly or unwillingly, to bow his head; and that a righteous man who was not aware of anything like this approached (God) with the same self-condemnation as a tax collector, this is amazing and shows a truly contrite soul. For how do they differ from the words: “Be merciful to me a sinner” (Luke 18:13) from the words: “Lord, do not rebuke me with Your wrath, nor punish me with Your wrath”? The latter are even more expressive than the former. The publican did not dare to look at heaven, but the righteous one (David) did much more than him. He said: “be merciful to me,” but this one did not dare to say even that; He did not say: “Let not rebuke me,” but: “Let not Thy wrath”; He did not say: “Do not punish me,” but: “Lower by Thy wrath”; He prayed not not to be punished, but not to be severely punished. Thus, from everything one can see the humility of his soul - both from the fact that he considered himself worthy of such punishment, and from the fact that he did not dare to beg God for complete forgiveness, and this is characteristic of those who are extremely condemned and recognize themselves as more sinful than all people. And what is even more important is that he asks for deliverance from the grave punishment from the mercy and love of God, as if he were weak. “Have mercy on me,” he says, “for I am weak” (Ps. 6:3). What is this? He who is worthy of such testimony and who does not forget the destinies of God (“Your destinies,” he said, “I have not forgotten” [Ps. 119:30], shining brighter than the sun, speaks such words? Yes; It is worthy of surprise that he who accomplished such great deeds did not say anything great or think about himself, but considered himself the last of all and asked for salvation from God’s love for mankind alone. He seemed to be saying this: I am worthy of unrelenting punishment and eternal torment; but, since I can no longer bear it, I pray to be delivered from real disasters, like slaves who have done a lot of bad things, who cannot say that they have not sinned, but since the pain from the lashes is unbearable, they finally beg for the blows to stop. But here, I think, David also understood another weakness. Which one? The weakness that came from grief and sighing. When excessive sorrow befalls us with great force, it consumes all the strength of the soul. This, I think, was also experienced by the righteous man from strong self-condemnation and from the fact that he was not carried away by pleasant hopes, but always the opposite. He clearly expresses this in further words. Having said: “Lord, do not reprove me with Your wrath, ... have mercy on me,” he added: “For I am weak: heal me, O Lord, for my bones are crumpled, and my soul is greatly troubled” (Ps. 6:3–4). If the one whose conscience was so clear prays that his deeds will not be subjected to strict examination: what will we do, who are burdened with so many vices, so far from his boldness and have not shown even the slightest share of his confession? Why did this blessed one utter such a confession? He was convinced that no one would be justified before God, that even the righteous were barely saved; That’s why he begs (God) - sometimes like this: “Do not enter into judgment with Your servant” (Ps. 142:2); and sometimes like this: “Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak” (Ps. 6:3). 5. It is remarkable that David nowhere mentions his good deeds, but leaves his salvation to God’s love for mankind. This is characteristic of a contrite soul and a humble spirit; and from here it happened that he who had accomplished great virtues feared and trembled more than sinners. And why David was so trembling and afraid, listen to how he himself says: “If you see iniquity, Lord, Lord, who will stand?” (Ps. 129:3). He knew, clearly knew, that we owe God a lot and that the most unimportant sins are worthy of great punishment; foresaw long ago what commandments Christ would give upon his coming; believed that not only murders would be strictly condemned, but also insults and slander, and vicious thoughts, and laughter, and idle talk, and buffoonery, and other, even less important, vices. Therefore, Paul, although he did not know anything about himself, said: “I have nothing... in myself: but I am justified in no way” (1 Cor. 4:4). Why? Because, even if he did not do anything bad, as he really did not do, he did not consider himself to have fully rendered the honor due to God. Even if we died a thousand times, even if we performed every virtue, we would not pay tribute to God for the blessings given to us by Him. Look: not having any need for us, but being self-satisfied, He brought us from non-existence into existence, breathed (into us) a soul, which (he did not give) to any of the animals on earth; he planted Paradise, spread out the sky, laid the earth under it, lit the brilliant lights; he decorated the earth with lakes, springs, rivers, flowers and plants, and placed a choir of various stars in the sky; made the night no less useful for us than the day, from the peace and strengthening that sleep brings. Sleep nourishes our bodies no less than food, as can be seen from the following: we often see that hunger endures for many days, and it is impossible to go without sleep for even a few days. The night also cools us down and destroys the heat in us that accumulates during the day, partly from the sun’s rays, partly from daytime labors, and thus restores our vigor for work again, and in winter, with its duration, it gives us even more peace and joy, forcing us to be under the roof of our homes. And darkness is made a part of this time not in vain and not without purpose, but for greater peace. Just as compassionate mothers, wanting to put restless children to sleep, take them into their arms and, throwing a veil over their eyes, put them to sleep: so God, spreading darkness throughout the universe, like some kind of cover, calms people from their labors. If this were not the case, then we would all overstrain ourselves from fussiness or excessive love of money and from work; and now, involuntarily, (the night) takes us away from our studies. And such a law (of nature) not only restores our bodies, but also our soul no less than our bodies. Should we talk about peace and quiet at this time? How then everything is full of silence, free from noise, no one’s cry is heard, as happens during the day, when some mourn from poverty, others complain of insult, others mourn illness and injuries to the body, others the death of relatives, others the loss of money, others some other human misfortune, of which there are so many! From all these misfortunes, as if from worries, the night delivers the human race and calms it in its haven. These are the benefits of the night for us; and the benefits delivered by day are known to all of us. What can we say about the convenience of the messages we use? So that the length of the journey would not turn us away from communicating with each other, God laid out the shortest route for us throughout the entire earth - the sea, so that we, living in the universe, as if in one house, often came to each other and each, easily communicating his own to his neighbor, received back what he had, and thus, occupying a small part of the earth, enjoyed the benefits of all countries, as if he were the owner of the whole earth; just as at a rich table, each guest can himself give what was offered to him to someone sitting far away, and receive from him what lies in front of him, only by extending his hand. If someone begins to count all other blessings, he will find an indescribable multitude of them, and will not count even a small part; because how can a person measure the infinite Wisdom of God? Just imagine different genera of fruitful and barren plants, growing in deserts, in inhabited places, on mountains, on plains; look at the variety in seeds, herbs, flowers, land animals, amphibians, sea creatures; remember that everything visible was created for us - heaven, earth, sea and everything in them. Just as if someone built for himself a brilliant palace, decorated with a lot of gold and shining with the bright shine of stones, so God, having created the world, brought man into it so that he reigned over everything. And even more amazing is that (God) did not build the roof of this building from stones, but composed it from another most precious substance, and lit the fire not on a golden lamp, but, lowering the lights from above, commanded them to flow along the roof of this building, so that we would receive not only benefit, but also great pleasure; and spread out the earth in the form of a rich meal. God gave all this to a man who had not yet done anything good. Although man, after such a gift, turned out to be ungrateful to his Benefactor, God did not deprive him of honor, but only expelled him from Paradise and thereby punished him in order to prevent the further increase of ingratitude and keep him from striving for worse. Thinking about all this, and, as moved by the Spirit of God, contemplating much more than that - both what was from the beginning (of the world), and what happens every day, and what happens to everyone separately, and what happens to everyone together, and what happens openly, and what is secretly even more obvious, as well as the works of the economy of the Only Begotten Son of God and future blessings, surveying everything in general and Finding and contemplating the ineffable love of God in everything, the apostle, as if cast into an immeasurable abyss, realized how much and great he owed (to God), and did not repay Him even the smallest part. That’s why he said the words mentioned above, examined his small sins with great care, and consigned his good deeds to oblivion (1 Cor. 4:4). But we are not like that; but we neither speak nor remember about sins, no matter how numerous and great they are; and if we do some small good deed, then we show it everywhere and do not cease to boast and be arrogant until we abolish even the smallest good by vanity. With this in mind, David also said: “What is man, that you remember him” (Ps. 8:5)? In addition, accusing a person of ingratitude, he said: “A man who is in honor has no understanding: he has been likened to foolish cattle and become like them” (Ps. 49:13). 6. It is common for a grateful slave to look at the benefits shown to everyone together as if they were his own, and to care and take care as if he himself were a debtor for everything. This is what Paul did (it’s good to remember him again) when he said that the Lord died for him: “Even now,” he said, “I live in the flesh, I live by faith the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me” (Gal. 2:20). He spoke this way not because he wanted to curtail the gift of Christ, but because he wanted to present himself as guilty of everything and arouse in everyone the same state of mind. If Christ had come for one person, His gift would not only not have diminished, but would have been even greater. Why is this so? Because He would show such care for one person as one looking for one (lost) sheep; That’s why (Paul) was embarrassed, that’s why he cried. If those who borrow money and cannot pay, drowning in a great abyss of debts, do not eat or sleep from painful care, then what will not the righteous endure when he sees his debt (to God) consisting not in money, but in deeds? But we are not like that; but having paid even a little, we behave as if we had paid everything, and even act even worse: we don’t do this little with the zeal that is appropriate for free people, but we find out in advance whether there is a reward for it, whether the reward is great, whether it will be imputed to us ourselves, uttering the words of unfree and hired people. What are you saying, cowardly and pathetic person? You must do something pleasing to God, but you stand there worrying about the reward? If you were to fall into Gehenna for such a deed, would you even then have to shy away, and not with great readiness take up the task of doing good? You do something pleasing to God, and you seek yet another reward. Truly you do not know what a great good it is to please God; because if you knew this, you would not be able to compare any other reward (with this benefit). Don't you know that your reward will be greater when you do what is right without hoping for reward? Don’t you see that even among people everyone especially respects those who, before receiving awards, have in mind to please (them) and strive for this more than for honor from them? This is how people act so nobly even with their own kind, but you, having been so favored by the Lord and expecting the good of so many, when it is necessary to do something useful for your salvation, before the deed, you inquire about the reward. That is why we are always cold and pitiful and not ready for any noble deed; Therefore, we cannot be in contrition and even a little gather our courage. We do not think carefully about our sins, and do not examine the blessings of God, and do not look at those who have accomplished the greatest feats. We forget about good deeds because we do not use well-being in moderation, and when we often call ourselves sinners, we do not say this sincerely. This is evident from the fact that when we hear such a name from others, we become angry and irritated and call it insult. So in everything we have hypocrisy, and we do not imitate the publican, who, when another reproached him for many sins, endured these reproaches and received fruit from his deeds - “hereafter... justified more than” the Pharisee (Luke 18:14); and we do not even know what confession is, although we are filled with countless sins. We should not only be convinced that we have many sins, but also write all our sins, small and great, on our hearts, as in a book, and mourn them as if they were recently committed. Then we would humble the pride of our soul, constantly reminding it of our vices. The remembrance of one's sins is such a blessing that Blessed Paul often displayed even his smoothed-out guilts. Since he washed away all his previous guilts with baptism, and after that he lived so purely that he did not recognize anything about himself and had no sins to sigh about, he remembered the sins that had already been washed away by baptism, and said: “For Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, from whom I am the first” (1 Tim. 1:15); and again: “Christ was faithful to me, putting me... in service, having been... sometimes a blasphemer and a persecutor and a troublemaker” (1 Tim. 1:12–13), “for in many ways they persecuted the Church of God and destroyed it” (Gal. 1:13); and again: “I am not worthy to be called an apostle” (1 Cor. 15:9). Such sins, although they free us from guilt, can nevertheless sufficiently excite the soul and dispose it to strongly love God. So Simon, in response to the question of the Lord, “which” of the two debtors “will love” the creditor more, saying: “I think that you have left him his debt,” he heard: “Thou hast judged righteously” (Luke 7:42–43). 7. When we think about the multitude of our previous sins, then we will recognize the excessiveness of God’s mercy, then we will bow our heads, then we will humble ourselves; because the more serious the sins of which we are guilty, the more we will repent. Thus, Paul remembered his previous sins, but we do not want to remember those we committed after baptism, which threaten us with danger and expose us to responsibility for them; but if the thought of any such sin comes to us, we immediately eliminate it and do not want to sadden the soul by remembering (about it) even for a short time. And from this useless tenderness many evils come to us, because, being in such a state of complacency and effeminacy, we cannot confess our previous sins (how is this possible when we train ourselves not to allow even the memory of them?), and easily fall into subsequent ones. If this remembrance is always alive in us and fear troubles our soul, then we can easily eradicate its effeminacy and carelessness. But if you remove (from her) this bridle, then who will finally hold her and prevent her from rushing fearlessly along the rapids and plunging into the abyss of destruction? Therefore, the righteous (David) imagined future punishment; therefore he wept, therefore he sighed, and very much at that! For you, great people, for contrition it is enough to remember the blessings of God, not to remember your own virtues, to delve with great care into whether you happened to commit some small sin, to look at great men who were very pleasing to God; after all this, reflect on the unknown of the future, on the tendency (of people) to fall and sin, which Paul was afraid of, and therefore said: I am afraid, “lest, if I preach to others, I myself will be turned away” (1 Cor. 9:27); and: “Be sure to stand and be careful, lest you fall” (1 Cor. 10:12). So David thought about all this within himself and, reflecting on the good deeds of God, said: “What is man, that you remember him? Or son of man, because you visit him? If an angel made him a little, you crowned him with glory and honor” (Ps. 8:5-6). And he forgot about his good deeds so much that in his immeasurable wisdom he said: “Who am I, my Lord, Lord? and what is my father's house, because you loved me even to this day? and this is small before You, O my Lord, ... and You spoke about the house of Your servant afar off: This is the law of man with You, O my Lord, Lord. And what else will David add to You” (2 Samuel 7:18–20)? Often thinking about the virtues of his ancestors, he considered himself as nothing in comparison with them. So, having said: “Our fathers trusted in You,” he added about himself: “I am a worm, and not a man” (Ps. 22:5, 7). And he had the uncertainty of the future before his eyes, so that he said: “Enlighten my eyes, lest I sleep into death” (Ps. 12:4). And he considered himself guilty of so many sins that he said: “Cleanse away my sin: there is much” (Ps. 24:11). So, this is enough for you great people; and even with these treatments, we still have a strong and sufficient basis for the destruction of pride and all arrogance. What is it? Many sins, an evil conscience: when it takes possession of us, it does not allow us, even if we desire, to rise to heights. Therefore, I ask and beseech you, with the boldness that you have acquired before God through your virtues, to give a hand (of help) to us who are constantly praying, so that we can worthily mourn the burden of so many sins, and, having mourned, enter on the favorable path that leads us to Heaven, so that we do not suffer along with the outcasts, descending into hell, where no one can confess (Ps. 6:6), and from where no one will free us. While we are here, we can receive great benefit from you, and you can greatly benefit us; and when we go to a place where neither a friend, nor a brother, nor a father can help or be with us during punishment, then it will be necessary in oppression and deep darkness and in the complete absence of comforters to endure endless punishment and be unburnt food for the all-consuming flame. You might be interested in: