Беседа в понедельник 1-ой недели Великого поста. Приготовление к Таинству Исповеди

Beloved brothers! We are in the haven of holy fasting. We now set aside a special time for a special, attentive, detailed examination of ourselves: the gates of repentance are opening wider for us. Residents of the holy monastery! Closest disciples of Christ! Ever-present children of the Church, who are constantly at her spiritual breasts! We should not need special time to pay attention to ourselves, to cleanse our sinful stains through confession and repentance: our whole life should consist of unceasing attention, of unceasing repentance, if our life corresponded to our name. The example of purity to which we must achieve is perfect. He is our Lord Jesus Christ. “According to him who called you holy,” says the Apostle, “you yourself will be holy in all your life. It is written beforehand: Be holy, for I am holy” (1 Peter I: 15, 16). According to the infinite perfection of the example of purity, the field of repentance and purification is endless. Even if someone were to pursue this course with all possible zeal and diligence, he would not be able to achieve perfection in purification. Even if his life in constant repentance continued for thousands of years, he would not have achieved complete purification. The greatest among the holy monks realized at their death that they not only did not commit, but also did not begin repentance 21 . And we, due to our infirmities, constantly growing and multiplying, on the day of our departure from earthly life we ​​will be very far from that shrine in which our reverend Fathers, the chosen vessels of God, the inhabitants of the deserts, - now the inhabitants of heaven, for their thorough stay in repentance during their wanderings through the desert of earthly life, came forth from their bodies. So! Those who spend their lives in constant attention, constantly watching their soul, noticing the various effects of sin in it, constantly healing from this poison by repentance, do not achieve the fullness of spiritual perfection. What can we say about those who live carelessly, are in constant amusement, never thinking, or thinking very rarely, as if in passing, about what they most need to think about, about their salvation? I will say about them what has already been said about them; I will pronounce the sentence already pronounced on them. I will say it with sorrow of heart, but I will say it unmistakably: because I will only repeat the words of the Apostle, the words of God. The widow, who feeds extensively, is alive and dead (1 Tim. V, 5, 6). Do not think that these words apply only to widows according to the flesh! They relate much more to me and to you, who have renounced the world to serve Christ; the monk is a true widow, for whom the world must be dead. Monk, mysterious widow! Listen to my wretched words. Have you called yourself dead to the world and the vain age in order to come to life for God and blissful eternity? Delve into Scripture, delve into yourself, compare the state of your soul with the state destined for it in Scripture, and say - are you really dead to the world? Has your killing at least begun? Did you feel revived by God? Have your thoughts and desires moved into the next century? It is rare, very rare, that can answer these questions in the affirmative; rather, each of us recognizes the justice of the terrible sentence pronounced. This sentence is burdensome for the ear and heart of the carnal and peace-loving, but it is better to hear it here, while the earthly wandering still continues, until the field of repentance and correction has ceased. If my words cause fear and grief in you, then blessed is this fear, this sadness is desirable! “For sorrow, even according to God,” says the Apostle, “repentance without repentance leads to salvation” (2 Cor. VII, 10). Having an effect over time, it will direct you to escape from sadness and languor, as if terrible both in their eternity and in the terrible torment they produce, inexpressible in words, incomprehensible to our mind and sensation. Let everyone delve into themselves, let everyone believe in themselves my words, which I will pronounce for the salvation of your souls and my soul! We are assigned paradise, heaven, eternal bliss, if we live here piously, fulfilling the vows we made at baptism, repeated when taking monastic vows, supplemented by vows of non-covetousness and virginity. But we do not pay attention to the prepared bliss, just as a sleeper is insensitive to the pleasures and pleasures of this life around him and awaiting his awakening, we never think about the ineffable future blessings: our thought is always on earth, all in earthly pleasures, in earthly cares. Are we not dead in soul, although we seem alive to ourselves and to those who have carnal wisdom, they look with only carnal eyes 22. We are assigned hell, eternal fire, a never-ending worm to constantly reproach and torment us if we spend our earthly life in sins and in sinful pleasures. And we are looking for these pleasures, we are chasing after them; in them are our desires and thoughts. We live as if there were no hell, as if we were immortal, eternal on earth, as if we had achieved infinite bliss. In vain does the Word of God thunder with threats, in vain does it proclaim terrible endless torments! We see the death of our brothers, we participate in their burial: this does not make any impression on us, as if death is the lot of other people, not ours at all. We, like the dead, have neither remembrance, nor premonition of death, nor remembrance, nor premonition of the future. We're definitely dead. “The name of Imashi is alive, but you are dead” (Rev. III, 1), the true Word of God testifies to every carnal man. For us, the Son of God descended to earth, trampled our death with His death, and became life for us and together the path to this life. He demands from us that we crucify our “flesh with passions and lusts” (Gal. V, 24), demands not because He Himself needs it, but because we need it: only in a body killed for sin can the manifestation of grace-filled life be revealed 23 . But we hear only the sounds of words, the words themselves the soul does not understand and does not accept: they are pronounced for us as if in a foreign, unknown language. And this is not surprising, this is a direct consequence of our state of mind. A dead person in body is incapable of bodily sensations: whether they will glorify him, whether they will give him countless wealth, whether they will expose him, whether they will shower him with humiliation, he is insensitive to everything. Likewise, someone who is dead in soul cannot understand spiritual words, cannot experience spiritual blessings, cannot have the proper remembrance of death and eternal torment, the proper knowledge of the vanity of this world and age. Knowledge, however, is so clear and tangible: he is poisoned, killed by sin, henceforth alien to God and blessedness, hence sealed as a sacrifice to hell. The life of the body comes from the presence of the Holy Spirit in it. Will I be able to worthily glorify the incomprehensible goodness of the all-good God, His inexpressible long-suffering, His ineffable love for mankind! Shall I call with the Prophet for praise the regiments of Angels, all the tribes of men, - moreover, all the animals and livestock, birds of the air, creeping things and reptiles, fish wandering in vast expanses of water, with them all inanimate creatures! And then all creation, united in one mouth, one voice of praise, will not be able to worthily sing of the worshiped goodness of God, which exceeds words, exceeds comprehension. Come, brethren, let us bow down and fall at her feet: she is still patient with our iniquities, she is still waiting for our conversion, she is still stretching out her arms to us, calling those wandering in the deserts and impenetrable wilds of sin, accepting repentant sinners, making them sons and daughters of God. Now, having heard her voice, the voice calling you to repentance, “do not harden your hearts” (Heb. III, 15); “Having ears to hear” (Matthew 13:9), do not remain deaf. “Rise up from sleep” in the deep sleep of negligence and complete disregard for salvation! “Rise from the dead” (Eph. V, 14), dead through insensibility and bitterness, through a life that is completely sacrificed to the flesh, sin and corruption! May I see in you the movement of life, awakened by the word proclaiming repentance! May I hear your voice, the voice of sighing, the voice of your crying, the voice of your repentance, so that I may be convinced that there is still a sign in you, the rest of your life! The Lord, seeing that you have spent all the days of your life fruitlessly, will again grant you a day for effortless salvation, a day on which, through sincere confession before your spiritual father, you can throw off the entire burden of your sins. Repentance is omnipotent, as an institution of omnipotent God. There is no sin that can withstand the face of repentance. It is a gift given to fallen human nature; it is a remnant of our primitive innocence, like the consciousness of this innocence and lamentation about the loss of it, it is the proclamation of baptism; it is the connection between earth and heaven, a ladder to heaven. Through it all sin is cleansed and blotted out. Even if you were burdened with the gravest sins, do not stop at all from beginning to repent. The immeasurable ocean equally absorbs the waters of a wide river that has flowed majestically through many countries, and the modest streams of a barely noticeable stream; Thus, in the abyss of God’s goodness, grave sins disappear along with the slightest, most insignificant errors. Let five hundred and fifty denarii, equally forgiven, assure you of this: the lender is infinitely rich, and the debtors are all bankrupt (Luke VII, 41, 42). And a small sin remains unerased if the sinner neglected to repent of it, as insignificant in his opinion; and great sin is completely blotted out through repentance by the unlimited goodness and omnipotence of God. Remember Saint David, who fell into fornication and murder. Negligence crept into the soul of the righteous in an inconspicuous way, from negligence was born non-storage of bodily feelings, the gaze freed from storage unexpectedly met the object of temptation; the object of temptation aroused a criminal desire in the sanctified soul; the wish was followed by criminal execution; the commission of adultery was followed by vainglorious shame. The shame with which human pride was ashamed of sin gave birth to a new criminal desire, the desire to hide sin, the desire to maintain the guise of righteousness before people. This is why murder was committed. David remained for a long time in bitterness, insensibility, as if innocent of any sin. What was needed was reproof from God himself. The prophet Nathan, at the command of God, exposed the sinner, and as soon as David said: “those who have sinned against the Lord,” an answer came from the Lord: The Lord has taken away your sin” (2 Sam. XII, 13). Almighty repentance saved entire cities and kingdoms, and canceled the sentences already pronounced by God. So the populous city of Nineveh, doomed by the prophet of God to destruction, turned it away with sincere repentance - and in vain the prophet not far from Nineveh awaited its destruction, the fulfillment of his prophecy! Thus, the wicked Israeli king Ahab, a worshiper of idols, a persecutor and murderer of worshipers of the true God, had already been sentenced to execution, already announced by the great Elijah, but Ahab was touched and shed tears, remaining, however, in wickedness. This short-term tenderness, these small tears did not remain without their effect: “Ahab was touched at my presence,” the Lord said to the prophet Elijah, “for this reason I will not bring evil in his days, but in the days of his son I will bring evil to his house” (1 Kings XXI, 29). All Holy Scripture, all Church History are filled with countless examples that prove the powerful power of repentance. A certain robber, Palladius relates in Lavsaik, was caught in the act of committing the crime and brought to Arsenait, a city of Thebaid. After many tortures, they sentenced him to cut off his head. When he went with the soldiers outside the city to the place of the atrocity he had committed, which was six miles away from the city, an unknown monk followed him, wanting to watch his execution. The robber, seeing the monk following him, said to him: “Abba, don’t you really have a cell and needlework?” The monk answered: “I have.” The robber said to this: “Why don’t you sit in your cell and cry for your sins?” The monk answered: “brother! I am very lazy, my soul has no tenderness, why did I come to see you die. Maybe with the help of this spectacle I will come to tenderness.” Then the robber said to him: “Abba! sit in your cell for God’s sake, bless and praise the Savior Christ, from the time He became man and died for us sinners, man no longer dies.” Here is another, equally touching and instructive story. "Near a certain city there lived a recluse who had the gift of clairvoyance from God. In that city there was a harlot known to all the inhabitants. One day the hermit sees a bright path stretching from the convent located in the city to heaven, along which the soul walks in great joy, guided by the Angels, and approaches the gates of heaven. He sent a disciple to the convent to find out who had reposed there. The disciple, returning, brought the news that no one was in the monastery did not die, but died suddenly before the gates of the monastery, a well-known harlot, having come there from the city, perplexed, the recluse began to pray to God, so that God would explain the vision to him: “Exactly, was God’s answer to the holy elder, you saw the soul of a wife, a former harlot, ascending to heaven. She made a firm intention to repent and improve, and went to the monastery with the determination to join it. That she died before the gates of the monastery, without having time to fulfill her intentions, was by God’s decree. But God accepted her intention as the deed itself.” In these two stories we experience the fulfillment of the promises of the Gospel. And the Gospel itself presents so many such experiences! The publican, burdened with sins, came to the church of God, and for his humility and repentance he left the church justified. Another publican, Zacchaeus, had barely set out to reform when he was called the son of Abraham: a sentence came out about him from God: “Today salvation has come to this house” (Luke XIX, 9). The harlot, who fell at the feet of the Savior and changed her love for sin to love for God, heard: “Her many sins are forgiven, because she loved much” (Luke VII, 47). The robber, crucified at the right hand of the God-man, received salvation in the last minutes of his stormy life. As soon as he humbled himself, as soon as he recognized himself as worthy of condemnation, his spiritual eyes were opened and he recognized the God-Man crucified near him; having known, he confessed; He just confessed how he received the promise of eternal bliss. An event that fully corresponds to the teachings of the Gospel! “Believe in Me,” said the Lord, “even if he dies, he will live” (John XI, 25). He openly and clearly announced about himself: “I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance” (Matthew IX, 13). Do not think that those sinners who lived during the Savior’s stay on earth were especially happy: happy were those who resorted to confession of sins and repentance, on the contrary, those who rejected the almighty medicine of repentance, remained in sins, died from their unrepentance, from their bitterness. Nothing and no one prevents us from now taking advantage of the happiness of repentant sinners before the Lord Jesus Christ himself. He said about Himself to those who believe in Him: “Behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age” (Matthew XXVIII, 20). When you appear before your spiritual father, he will confirm to you the truth we proclaimed: “Behold, child,” he will say, Christ stands invisibly, accepting your confession” 24 . Standing before Christ himself, ask Him, and receive from Him great and rich mercy - forgiveness of sins. Why should we hesitate? Why stop, come into doubt and double-mindedness, with which the devil amuses himself and strengthens himself against us? You will say that numerous, serious, long-term sins lead to doubt and double-mindedness; from constant falls into sin the strength of the soul has become exhausted, I feel a weakening of the will itself. So! Your sins are grave. For all doctors your condition is incurable, but not for the doctor-Lord, almighty and infinitely merciful. Your incredulous timidity would then still be somewhat excusable, when you could expect that the doctor would turn his eyes away from you, reject you with contempt and anger. But He does not reject you; on the contrary, He calls you to Himself, begs you to come to Him. He will not rebuke you, no cruel word will come out of His mouth. He calls you to Himself solely to grant you forgiveness and healing. “Come, and let us be finished, says the Lord, and though your sins be as scarlet, they will be as white as snow; Even if they are like scarlet, I will make them white as wool” (Isa. I, 18). The purpose of Christ's coming to earth was to free human souls from the sin that possessed them and to restore the fallen Divine image in us. “Behold, the Lamb of God,” John the Baptist testifies of Jesus, takes away the sins of the world” (John I, 29). The healing of bodily diseases was only proof of the healing of the soul from sin. When the paralyzed man was brought before the Lord, He said to the sick man: “Be of good cheer, child, your sins will be forgiven you” (Matthew IX, 2). Some of the scribes present here thought that blasphemy had been uttered. Jesus, having seen their thoughts, said: “What evil thoughts do you think in your hearts? Whatever is more convenient, say: those sins are forgiven; or say: rise up and walk. But if you know that the Son of Man has power on earth to forgive sins, then say to the paralytic: Arise, take up your bed and go to your house” (Matthew IX, 4-6). If you are so weakened by sin that you have lost the very will to do good, if you are a leper, deaf and blind in soul, if you have obeyed the devil so much that you have entered completely into his power, and, acted by the violence of the enemy, you resemble a demoniac - then even then do not hesitate to begin repentance, and you will hear: “Your sins are forgiven.” Your Creator is the Creator of your heart, your mind, and your will. Have you upset them, corrupted them with sin? The Creator can recreate a pure heart from a defiled heart, and renew a darkened, damaged mind with His omnipotent Truth. He can confirm your suffering and exhausted will under the violence of sin in goodness, and thus return joy to your soul through the hope of salvation, which is in the victories of the will over sin. Let no evil thoughts arise in anyone: "it is easy to obtain forgiveness through repentance; the convenience of receiving forgiveness allows one to be less strict with oneself and allows one to indulge in sinful pleasures. Moreover, it looks with condescension at the resumption of serious falls." No! This is not the condition on which forgiveness of sins is granted upon repentance. It is given so that those who have fallen into mortal sins will leave them. This is clear from the very words of the Savior: having forgiven the harlot brought to judgment before Him by the Pharisees, He said to her: “Go, and from now on do not sin to anyone” (John VIII, 11). The Lord commanded the same thing to the one He healed in the vestibule of Bethesda, commanded with the threat of greater punishment for violating what was commanded: “Behold, you are healthy,” He said, “let no one sin, lest it be worse for you” (John V, 14). This is how the venerable desert Fathers understood and fulfilled the words of the God-Man, and this is how they taught the brethren. Avva Pimen to the question “what does repentance from sin mean?” answered: “It consists in repenting of sin and not repeating it. Those who did this are called blameless and righteous, because they forsook their sins and became righteous." 25. The great mentor of monastics, Saint Isaac of Syria, speaks of those who repeat their sins: "Whoever, in the hope of repentance, falls into sin a second time, walks before God with wickedness, such an unexpected death is sent to him, and he does not receive the time he expected to correct his virtue." 26. This is of course about mortal sins, and not about those impulses from weakness that are healed by daily repentance, to which the Saints were not completely alien. But if, due to unfortunate habit and relaxation, being drawn as if by force by flesh and blood, you cannot resist mortal sins, mainly called “falls”: then even then do not give in to the despair to which a person is so violently drawn. an uninterrupted series of falls. We have the wise instruction of Siso the Great for this case. One day his brother said to him with sorrow of heart: “Father! what should I do? I have fallen” - the Elder answered him: “Rise up” - The brother said: “I rose up, and fell again.” The elder answered: “Arise again.” The brother objected: “How long shall I rise and fall?” The elder said: “until your death.” A true servant of God is kept not only from sinful deeds and words, but is kept from the very thoughts and feelings of sin. For his loyalty to the Lord, he is awarded special spiritual gifts. The Monk Silouan, a skete and then a Sinai ascetic, abounded with them; when they asked him how he acquired grace, Silouan answered: “I never allowed a thought into my heart that would anger God” 27 . He who has saved himself from mortal sins should not think that he needs a little repentance. Your sins are light before your eyes, but you do not know what their weight is on the scales of God’s justice. “Into the judgment of man and another from the judgment of God,” said a certain venerable desert dweller, discussing before his death about his monastic and ascetic activity 28 . The legislator of the people of Israel, the Seer of God, the holy Moses, shining with the rays of prophecy, miracles, and rays of visible glory, uttered a rash word before the people, being upset by their obstinacy. He only “dissembled with his mouth” (Ps. CV, 33), according to the expression of the holy Psalmist; he uttered a word of disbelief with his lips, being filled with faith in his heart; he uttered this word with his lips, recognizing the wickedness and unbelief of the people as unworthy of a miracle and good deed, as if believing that the grace of God, weakened by the people's wickedness, is not strong enough and is sufficient in itself to work a miracle. Sin, apparently unimportant and excusable, sin in a holy man, rich in good deeds and gifts of grace, is otherwise judged by God, not only deserves reproof, not only included in the books of Holy Scripture for the knowledge of the entire Israeli people and for the knowledge of the whole world who have faith in the true God - is punished with temporary execution. Moses, who knew the power of prayer and the infinite mercy of God, resorts in vain to prayer and propitiation of God; Moses, who more than once turned away the wrath of God from the entire people of Israel, prays for himself that the decree pronounced against him will be canceled; he prays, but is not heard. “The Lord despises me for your sake,” said Moses, telling the people about the consequences of his prayer, “and did not listen to me” (Deut. III, 26). Nothing is said in Scripture without a holy purpose. Guessing the purpose of Scripture in the present circumstance, we will not sin at all if we admit that it serves us as an instruction and warning, so that we do not consider our small sins small, but take care to avoid them with all care and be cleansed from them by repentance. How much we sin from ignorance! We sin so much from weakness! How much we sin, carried away by entertainment, by the example of others, by condescension towards others! How many stumbling blocks we are allowed for judging our neighbor, for being hard-hearted towards him! We remain careless, and the manuscripts of our sins multiply. The righteous Job knew this, and daily he offered prayers and sacrifices to God for his children, saying: “When my sons sinned ... against God. This is what Job did all his days” (Job I, 5). The sign of a righteous person is a decisive distrust of his own righteousness and continual repentance. When we put aside the entertainment that blinds us, when we go deeper into ourselves and begin to examine ourselves, comparing the state of our souls with what it should be according to the teaching of Holy Scripture, then we ourselves recognize small sins are no longer small, but grave and terrible, worthy of incessant tears and repentance. Let's open the Holy Scriptures and see what we should be. The holy Apostle Paul says: “The first man is from the earth with a ring; the second man is the Lord from heaven. As we have put on the image of earth, let us also be clothed in the image of heaven” (1 Cor. XV: 47, 49). Receiving being, beginning to exist, we at the same time put on the image of our forefather Adam, his fallen image; we are conceived and born with a body subject to disease and destruction, with a soul infected with sin; we are conceived and born, having the seed of sin planted in our entire nature, having the poison of sin spilled in all members of the soul and body. “I was conceived in iniquity and my mother gave birth to me in sins” (Ps. L, 7). Thus, the entire human race has become and is becoming obscene, being killed by sin, which has infected us at our very root, in our forefather. When we were recreated through redemption, it was necessary to eliminate the root, which continually communicated the deadly infection to all branches; it was necessary to replace it with a root that would impart to us life, incorruptibility, holiness; a new forefather was needed for the human race, and he became “the Lord from heaven.” He deigned to be a descendant of Adam in the flesh, having been conceived from the Virgin seedlessly and dispassionately. Adam and many people preceded Jesus by earthly birth; but by birth from death and the grave, which is the resurrection, Jesus preceded Adam and all men (Matthew XXVII, 53). He became the Firstborn of the human race, He is the first man to ascend to heaven. There He sat down at the right hand of God. Adam and the other holy forefathers of Jesus according to the flesh became His descendants by birth by the Spirit into regeneration. He is the Father of the future century, the Founder of the holy tribe of the chosen. In order for us, who began to exist in the image of the old Adam, to pass from his rejected offspring into the blessed offspring of the New Adam, we must be born again. “Unless someone is born of water and the Spirit,” the New Adam, our Lord Jesus Christ tells us, “he cannot enter into the kingdom of God” (John 3:5). We are born into a new grace-filled life through “holy baptism,” by which we pass into the offspring of the Lord Jesus Christ, we receive adoption as sons of the Father of the new age, just as the Apostle said: “For as many as were baptized into Christ, they put on Christ. We have received the Spirit of sonhood, for whom we cry: Abba, Father” (Gal. 3:27; Rom. VIII:15). But in order to remain in this adoption, we must live not according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit: “For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, these are the sons of God” (Rom. VIII, 14). On the contrary, “if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not his” (Rom. VIII, 9). Does this sign of adoption remain in us? Will the Spirit obey “our Spirit, for we are the children of God” (Rom. VIII, 16)? By this sign the venerable desert fathers tested and considered themselves; such consideration plunged them into the abyss of repentance and crying. Let us listen to how the Monk Macarius of Egypt, rightly called the Great, discusses this: “Like a body, he says, does not have its life from itself, but from the outside, that is, from the earth, and cannot live without external means: in the same way, the soul, if it is not reborn from here to the land of the living, if it does not feed spiritually there, and, having success in the Lord, grows spiritually, if it does not dress in the clothes of heavenly beauty taken from the Divinity itself, then God’s nature cannot live by itself in joy and peace, according to these words: “I am the bread of life” (John VI, 35) and the wine that gladdens the heart of man, and the oil of gladness (Ps. 103:15, Ps. 44:8), and the manifold food of the Spirit, and the heavenly robe of light coming from God Himself. the eternal life of the soul. Woe to the body when it is left in its one nature! It is destroyed and dies. Woe to the soul, when it is left to its own nature, it trusts only in its own works, having no communion with God’s Spirit! She dies without being worthy of eternal, Divine life... If you have become the throne of God, and the heavenly Horseman has sat on you; if your whole soul has become a spiritual eye and has become all light; if you have been brought up with the heavenly food of the Spirit, and have been given the water of your belly to drink, and have put on the clothing of the mysterious light; If your inner man has finally acquired all this, and is firmly informed of this, then truly you are already living eternal life, from now on your soul resting with the Lord, truly you have acquired and received from the Lord that which allows you to live a true life. If you don’t see any of this in yourself, then cry, be sick and sob bitterly, as if you have not yet become a participant in eternal and spiritual wealth, as if you have not yet acquired true life. Take care of your poverty, and ask the Lord day and night, as if you are in the grave, cruel poverty of sin. Oh, if only we would take care and concern for our misery! Oh, if only we would not live in carelessness, as if they were abounding in wealth and spiritual blessings!” 29. The desire to acquire true repentance was the motivating reason why the holy monks, feeling the poverty of spirit, withdrew into deep solitude, locked themselves in seclusion, and hid in dens and abysses on earth. But such a vision of one’s poverty, such a vision of the mortification of the soul by sin, is bestowed upon those who have already significantly succeeded in the monastic feat. It inspires a person with the determination to finally renounce the world, to die for the world, in order to completely devote himself to seeking eternal life within himself. Let us turn to another sign by which consideration of ourselves is more accessible to our new beginning. The Lord said in the Holy Gospel: “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word... He who does not love Me will not keep My words” (John XIV, 23–24). “If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love” (John 15:10). He who keeps Christ's commandments is Christ's; he who does not observe them does not belong to Christ. Consideration of our conscience, our spiritual state according to the Gospel commandments is very convenient, extremely soul-saving, and completely correct. For example, let's look at whether we have fulfilled some of the commandments of Christ set out in chapter 5 of the Gospel of Matthew. Have we not been angry with our neighbor in vain? Haven't we had, or still have, quarrels with anyone? Isn't memory malice at work in us? Have we not uttered words of reproach and abuse? Have you refrained from voluptuous glances, sensations, and thoughts? Didn't they repay evil for evil? Were you so meek as not to resist evil? Did we love our enemies? Did those who curse us bless us? Have you done good to those who hate us? Have you prayed for those who harm us? Of course, these few questions will complicate and expose our conscience. What can happen upon further and more detailed examination? Our eyes will be opened to our sins, a feeling of unceasing sadness about our unworthiness will be implanted in our hearts, we will learn to lament those sins that in our darkness seemed small to us, but by the very thing deprive us of adoption to God and a blessed eternity. The Lord Himself testified to both. Having commanded love for our enemies, He also announced the reason why this love is necessary for us: “that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven” (Matthew V, 45). Violation of the slightest gospel commandment is associated with a sad consequence: “Whoever destroys the unity of these little commandments,” said the Lord, “and teaches men this way, he will be called in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew V, 19), i.e., will not be a partaker of it 30. Complete inattention to the Gospel commandments, as if to a moral teaching that can be ignored, entails decisive destruction. Fulfillment of the commandments cannot be replaced by any deeds! The miracles below will not replace them! “Many people,” says the Savior, say to me on that day: “Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, and in Your name we have cast out demons, and in Your name we have created many mighty powers. And then we will confess to them, because I have known you no more: Depart from Me, you who practice iniquity” (Matthew VII: 22–23). The creation of the soul, based not on the fulfillment of the commandments, but on deeds alone, is fragile and vain; it cannot withstand either sorrows from people or temptations from demons; it is alien to light, full of darkness and self-delusion. “Everyone hear these words of mine,” proclaims the incarnate Word of God, “and without creating them, he will become like the ugly man who built his church on the sand: and the rain came down, and the rivers came, and the wind blew, and the church was polluted, and fell: and great was its destruction” (Matthew VII, 26-27). Repentance is necessary for everyone! Let everyone take advantage of the precious time given by the mercy of the Lord! Let everyone plunge into blissful repentance! Let us deal with it in particular during the current week, which we have set aside and designated for preparing ourselves for the sacrament of confession and the subsequent sacrament of communion. We will prepare with all possible attention. Let's not sacrifice this week to reckless entertainment: we've already sacrificed enough to it! Enough of self-destruction! Now let's take care of our salvation! Let us often open the book of conscience, let us peer into our sinful stains, let us prepare them for the washing of confession. Have no mercy on your sins! Do not consider any offense unimportant or excusable; do not recognize as innocent any skills or exercises condemned by Scripture. Blame yourself in order to receive abundant justification from God. Decide to openly expose your wounds before your spiritual father! Do not leave secret friendship, a secret connection with sin in your heart, hiding it, postponing its discovery until the future! Otherwise, your repentance will be untrue, hypocritical, a deposit will remain in your soul, a reason for continuing a sinful life. Unconfessed sins are conveniently repeated, as if committed in impenetrable darkness 31 . Hate sin with determination! Treason him by discovering him, and he will run away from you; expose him as an enemy, and you will receive from Above the power to resist him, to defeat him. Set within yourself the firm intention to lead a life pleasing to God and immediately repent of those attempts that happen to you either through weakness, or through the cunning of the enemy, or by coincidence. “Not falling is characteristic only of Angels; it is characteristic of people to fall and rise, having fallen; remaining in the fall is characteristic of only devils” 32. Decide to be a faithful servant of Christ all the days of your life! A faithful servant faithfully fulfills the will of his master; when he sins in any way, he immediately repents, becomes sad, asks for forgiveness, and makes amends for the offense by correction. Abhor the deeds, life and properties of a traitor! Do not make friends with the enemies of your God, your Creator, your Redeemer! Do not betray Him, neither for silver, nor for ambition, nor for gluttony, nor for lust!.. Use this week to review your past behavior. Prescribe for yourself images of correction: think about what vices you should leave behind, what virtues you should implant in your body and soul. Do this more than once during the week, think about it several times every day; What you forgot today, you will remember tomorrow. The Lord Himself, seeing your diligence, will send you good thoughts and open your eyes to your shortcomings. The more you immerse yourself in examining yourself, the more satisfactory your confession and repentance will be, the more palpable and abundant the renewal bestowed by the confession of sins will flow into your soul. “In a full belly there is no understanding of the mysteries of God” 33. Wanting to devote this week to spiritual studies and reflections, let us refrain from satiety, from any excess, and if possible, then from contentment in food and drink. Let us show in our bodies that we are followers of the Lord crucified for us! Let us tire our flesh by standing at church services. When she, feeling tired and exhausted, asks for rest, tell her as an admonition: “I remember the Lord who suffered for me, and I wish that you, my flesh, would partake, even in the slightest form, of the suffering that the most holy flesh of Christ felt, being crucified on the tree of the cross. Your pleasures are harmful to both you and the soul: they arouse carnal wisdom, love for the vain world and to temporary earthly life, they suppress spiritual movements, the memory of death and eternity is strengthened; through them, faith in Christ itself is weakened. Severity towards you brings innumerable benefits: it cleanses the mind, revitalizes the soul - makes you, mortal flesh, light, capable of spiritual achievements and spiritual sensations. The martyrs brought their blood to the foot of the cross of Christ; The holy desert dwellers performed laborious feats, if not equal, then similar to martyrdom. I, too, will bring him - even if it’s a little distress to my body! Through the dejection of my flesh, I will at least become somewhat like the Lord who was crucified for me! By depressing the flesh, I will at least punish myself somewhat for satisfying the sinful desires of the flesh! By depressing the flesh, I will actually show that I am angry with myself for the misdeeds I have committed, I condemn myself, I sincerely desire and seek correction! You yourself, my flesh, oppressed by fasting, vigil and church standing, intercede for yourself and your soul for abundant forgiveness.” If during this week we become satiated, if we are carried away to please the whimsical desires of the body, then can we expect that we consider ourselves as we should, so that we bring unfeigned repentance? Is it possible to believe that we will abandon vices and establish ourselves in virtue, when we carry out the work of turning from sin to God with double-mindedness, coldness, and negligence? No! Coldness and negligence are the exposers of shaky, crafty will. Let us fear the words of the Lord: “Thou art stupefied, and neither warm nor cold; Imam will puke you out of my mouth” (Rev. III, 16). Let's be zealous! In all good undertakings we need God's help: all the more do we need it to overthrow the yoke of sin and enter upon right and holy paths. God's help is sought through fervent, attentive prayer. The Holy Fathers instruct us to pray that we may be granted to see our sins, so that the good and saving thought of confessing our sins will be sent to us from Above 34 . Both are a gift from God! It would be more correct to say that all the actions that make up blessed repentance certainly require the cooperation of God. Pray to the Lord God to grant you to spend this week reverently and carefully, to grant you to examine yourself and see your sins. Pray to the Lord that He will put enmity between you and the seed of the serpent, which is sin; pray to Him that He will inspire you with courage in the struggle with yourself, with your damaged nature, with the death living in you. Pray to the Lord that He Himself will fight for you, and thus always give you victory: the Lord cannot but be the winner. If we are defeated, it means that we are fighting alone, that the Lord does not descend with us to battle against foreigners. He does not descend either because of our divided will, or because we deserve abandonment for our negligence, for our coldness towards Him, for our attachment to the world and its sweets. Pray to the Lord that He will help you tell all your sins to your spiritual father with all sincerity, rejecting harmful shame, and hear permission from his lips with living faith, as from the lips of God. Finally, pray to the Lord that, after being cleansed by repentance, you will no longer return to the sinful wilderness, to the sinful stench, to prison and hell, but to begin a life pleasing to God, attentive, - the path along which every stranger and wanderer on earth can achieve eternal, blissful peace. Ask for everything described above by prayer: “Without Me,” said the Lord, “you cannot do anything” (John XV: 5). Most of all, pray that you be given “a contrite spirit, a contrite and humble heart” (Ps. L, 19), streams of tears to wash away sinful filth. When the heart is pierced with saving sadness over sins, then life-giving tearful waters flow from the eyes. They renew the action of the waters of baptism on the soul and body, and are themselves called baptism. The waters of baptism wash away the sin of our parents, and in those who are baptized at an older age - also their own sins committed before baptism; Sins committed after baptism are washed away with tearful waters 35. Pray to receive these waters, prove your desire to acquire them by forcing yourself to them. Prepare yourself for confession and holy communion with tears! Wash, soften, revive the heart field with them; clarify with them the Divine image, renew the likeness, darkened and disfigured by irregular features and dirty paints. He who accepted the tears of a harlot and loosed her sinful bonds will also loose your chains. He who shed His sacred tears for Jerusalem, which stubbornly rejected the salvation that came to it from God, and blindly strove for destruction, will rejoice in your tears, which you shed, desiring to gain salvation. He who shed His holy tears at the news of the death of His friend Lazarus, who resurrected Lazarus, a dead man four days old and already stinking, will mercifully look at your tears, will resurrect your soul from sinful death, even if it were tied with funeral linings in all its members, even if it was already stinking from inveterate long-term sinful habits, even if a heavy stone was rolled at the entrance to your heart. bitterness and insensibility. He will command you to roll away the stone, to resolve your thoughts and feelings that are bound by death, so that you may move into spiritual success and dispassion 36 . You are preparing for an important sacrament - for one of the seven main sacraments of the Church - for holy confession! With the second baptism you intend to be baptized according to the secret teachings of Christianity! When you come to a spiritual clinic, do not leave unhealed. You are facing a wonderful and extraordinary trial: at it your sins will be weighed and assessed, and instead of the executions you deserve, you will be given justification, purity, and holiness. “Come, and let us be finished, says the Lord,” calling for this judgment, “and though your sins be as scarlet, I will make them as white as snow; and if they are like scarlet, I will make them as white as wool” (Isa. God, who became man, bore your executions on Himself, and He gives you, in His infinite goodness, His shrine, demanding from you only consciousness of your sins: it is impossible to forgive someone who is unconscious, who expresses through ignorance that he does not recognize himself as guilty, does not need forgiveness, and rejects him. Immerse yourself in reverent and pious contemplation of the sacrament, a truly great and amazing sacrament! Immerse yourself in the contemplation of God’s endless love for the fallen human race! “God creates his love in us, because while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Much more than having now been justified by His blood, we will be saved from wrath by Him” (Rom. V, 8, 9). And we will be saved from anger by repentance, which corrects all our misdeeds, supports us throughout our earthly wanderings, and removes us from every sinful abyss, no matter how deep it may be. The power and effect of repentance remain inexhaustible until the end of our lives. Even if someone falls every day, even if he has committed all the untruths and all the iniquities, repentance accepts him into its arms in order to cleanse, heal, make him righteous and holy. Only then does it remain invalid when its almighty help is rejected with reckless persistence and desperate blindness. And be surprised at this in this sacrament, that its minister was not an immaculate Angel, terrible in his very holiness, but a man subservient to us, burdened with the common infirmities of our race, no less in need of repentance than you, serving as a visible instrument of grace in the washing away of your sins and having the necessary need for the service of another in the washing away of his own sins. While you fall on your face before the sacred image of Christ in order to confess your sins to your confessor, he will humbly tell you, according to the will of the Holy Church: “I am indeed a witness, that I may testify before the Lord all that you have spoken to me” 37 . The goodness of God snatches you from everywhere for salvation, furnishes you from everywhere, surrounds you with conveniences to approach and draw closer to God. Such reflections are necessary to properly prepare oneself for the sacrament of confession. Smooth out the obstinate paths of your mind and heart, cleanse them from all guile and hypocrisy. Otherwise, you will only aggravate your sins: you will add to your previous sins a sin that is incomparably graver than them. I’m afraid to say with certainty what this sin is! But for your salvation I will say; I will say so that each of you, having heard how serious and terrible this sin is, will be afraid and avoid its hellish jaws. Have you fallen into condemnation, into gluttony, into anger? Have you fallen into fornication? You have sinned as a man. If you approach the sacrament of repentance with negligence, with guile, secrecy, then you will commit a satanic undertaking, you will reproach the Almighty and All-Seeing God, Who created you and recreated you, gave you the grace of repentance, so that with its help you would remain in refuge and a state of regeneration, Who will finally judge you and consider how you used His ineffable gifts. Following the confession, the Holy Church puts into the mouth of the confessor, for the precaution of the repentant, the following significant words: “Behold, child, Christ stands invisibly, receiving your confession: do not be ashamed, fear not, and do not hide anything from Me; but without hesitation, you have done everything, so that you may receive forgiveness from our Lord Jesus Christ. , purely the sin of Imashi” 38. Do not agree with the thought of the evil one, who will instill in you: “How can you tell your spiritual father a sin, both vile and base? Now hide it, and tell it at the next confession, when enough time has passed, and you will be less ashamed to talk about your sin, as if it were long past and barely remembered.” Recognize the voice of the ancient serpent, coming in the form of a thief, may he steal your good thoughts, may he kill you with evil advice, and may he destroy you (John X, 10) by taking away the salvation offered to you by the Lord (Rom. III, 24) in repentance. The sound of this voice is similar to the one that once penetrated paradise and brought our forefathers out of there. Son of Adam! Now he is trying to penetrate your soul so as not to let you into heaven. Turn away from him, do not listen to him, do not taste the poison that is deadly to your soul. Filled with meek faith, courageous self-sacrifice, humble simplicity and sincerity, proceed to the holy sacrament of confession. Believe that for the almighty Physician-Lord, all ulcers, both small and great, are equally insignificant and equally healable. The Almighty Word heals, resurrects, leads into heaven with a single word. The creator's work is unnecessary. He speaks His will, and every creature, visible and invisible, rushes to slavishly fulfill the Creative command! This will is spoken - and our sins, inscribed by us and our enemies on the eternal manuscripts, are erased. With faith, self-sacrifice is not difficult! Reject false, harmful shame, reject this keeper of sins, reject his mother - pride, blame yourself, condemn yourself! Bow your head in contrition of spirit, in tears and weeping, tell your sins to God in detail before your spiritual father - and the grace of the Holy Spirit will overshadow you, through the ministers of the mystery of God, bringing into the house of your soul the remission of sins and, in their place, the truth from God with eternal salvation, may you be blessed and may you glorify the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, now and ever and forever centuries. Amen. Sergius Hermitage, 1845. Venerable Sisoes the Great. Alphabetical Patericon and Chetya Menaion, July 6 days. Ladder, Word 18: about insensibility or mortification of the soul. Saint Isaac of Syria, Homily 2. Breviary. Following Confession. Venerable Agathon. Alphabetical Patericon. According to the explanation of Blessed Theophylact of Bulgaria. Ladder. Word 4, ch. 53. Ladder. Word 4, ch. 31. Saint Isaac of Syria. Word 56th. Evening Prayer of St. John Chrysostom Fr. Canon. You might be interested in: