Болезнь

I am very sorry that you are so sick and so weak that you can barely walk. I’m quite surprised how your good health and established for many years 8 suddenly changed so much. Therefore, I would advise you to look for the main causes of the disease, because in these years, without special reasons, bodily strength does not change so quickly. Having found any reason, follow the words of the apostle, who says: Everything that appears is light (Eph. 5:13) - and not only light, but also healing medicine. On the contrary, according to Saint Climacus, silent plagues often create death (2, part 2, pp. 73–74). Physical illnesses are necessary 9 for the cleansing of the flesh, and mental illnesses through insults and reproaches are necessary for the cleansing of the soul. But the Lord, without dividing one from the other, says in the Holy Gospel: Through your patience save your souls (Luke 21:19) and He who endures to the end will be saved (Mark 13:13) (2, part 1, p. 64). I regret that your health is currently very weak and makes you, apparently, incapable of performing monastic feats. But Saint Climacus even calls illness as asceticism, and, moreover, the most joyful asceticism, albeit involuntary. It is most gratifying because there are few hunters for voluntary asceticism, and moreover, exaltation and condemnation of others can be mixed in, and involuntary painful asceticism there is nothing for a person to be proud of... Voluntary and involuntary asceticism equally pacify the flesh, and the latter is sometimes sent also to destroy the exaltation. Therefore, try to be complacent in illness and thank God’s mercy for involuntary admonition. And again, most of all, in a painful situation, beware of a grumbling mood. The Monk Isaac the Syrian writes: “God bears all human infirmities, but He does not tolerate those who murmur unless He punishes them.” Also beware of grumbling at people for not fulfilling any of your demands or for other reasons. Whatever is sent to our patience, all of this is allowed by God’s Providence for our spiritual benefit, unless we ourselves damage it through our imprudence (2, part 2, p. 118). In the disease of the plague, no one else acts like an Angel of punishment sent from the Lord, and for cruel suffering in every possible way there will be mercy from the Lord to those who die such a death (2, part 3, p. 111). And if your health has become rotten, there is nothing to do, you must be patient; This is sent to our humility and, in general, to the benefit of our soul. Whoever accepts bodily illness and endures it as it should, it is said that as much as our outer man decays, so much the inner man is renewed (see 2 Cor. 4:16). The Apostle says about himself: When I am weak, then I am strong (2 Cor. 12:10), but with us it happens more like this: when the body is weak, the soul is also weak. But even in our weakness the Lord will remember us, if we are forced, as much as possible, to humble ourselves (2, part 3, p. 68). You write that your health has weakened significantly and is weakening, so that Mother Superior sends you to the doctor to consult about your ill health. Do not resist her in this; You can try and get treatment if treatment helps, just stick to your main thought - surrender to the will of God and pray to the Merciful Lord to arrange something useful for you, including the news of fate and as His goodness pleases (2, part 3, p. 108). ...Know that there are 10 sides with Shuya and those thoughts that frighten you with the duration of your illness and make you worry, that the monastery is generally communal and that you can burden both the monastery and the sisters with your illness by caring for you. Indiscriminately reject this enemy nonsense and false perversions. Know that by your illness you will give the serving sisters a reason to fulfill the commandment of the Lord: I was sick, and they served Me (see Matt. 25:36). And this blessed voice will be honored to be heard at the Last Judgment of Christ by those who serve the sick with zeal, and the sick will also receive their benefit, being tempted like gold in a painful crucible (2, part 3, pp. 113-114). It’s a pity that your sister N., apparently, fell ill with consumption so untimely. But God knows better than we do what is most useful to whom and when. We love each other as human beings, and God has mercy on us as the All-Good God and provides in every possible way for the benefit of our soul. In this disease, in general, people receive a peaceful and Christian death, so don’t worry too much about your sister (2, part 3, p. 104). Read together with Mother Abbess N. what was written in the book of Barsanuphius the Great to the sick elder Andrei, starting from the 163rd question. There you will see clearly that only patience and gratitude are required from the sick person and that bodily illness replaces physical asceticism, since this asceticism is undertaken to humble and tame the body, and this is replaced by bodily illness (2, part 3, p. 128). What is impossible for men is possible for God (Luke 18:27), who gives life and death, brings poverty and makes rich. Over such difficult and hopelessly ill people, the word of the Godfather Prophet David is fulfilled, who says: While teaching, the Lord punished me, but did not give me over to death (Ps. 117:18). Perhaps, because of his unquestioning obedience, he remained alive, and if he had not obeyed, then, very possibly, he would have died helpless. Death awaited him somewhere along the way. Apparently, the hour of God’s will for this to happen has not yet come. Obedience, brother, is a great thing (1, part 1, p. 164). ...The fate of the Lord is not tested. He lovingly leads others along a similar path of sorrows and illness for great spiritual good, and this is truly God’s mercy (2, part 1, p. 172). ...I hear that you grieve beyond measure, seeing the suffering of your sick daughter. Indeed, it is humanly impossible for a mother not to grieve when she sees her little daughter in such suffering, suffering day and night. Despite this, you must remember that you are a Christian who believes in a future life and a future blessed reward not only for work, but also for voluntary and involuntary suffering; and therefore should not be foolishly cowardly and grieve beyond measure, like pagans or unbelieving people who do not recognize either future eternal bliss or future eternal torment. No matter how great the involuntary sufferings of your daughter, little S., they still cannot be compared with the voluntary sufferings of the martyrs, but if they are equal, then she will receive a blissful state equal to them in the heavenly villages. However, we should not forget the tricky present times, in which even small children receive mental damage from what they see and what they hear; and therefore purification is required, which does not happen without suffering, but spiritual purification, for the most part, happens through bodily suffering. Let's assume that there was no mental damage. But you should still know that heavenly bliss is not given to anyone without suffering. Look: do the very infants also pass into the future life without illness or suffering? However, I am writing this not because I would wish the death of the suffering little S., but I am writing all this actually to console you and for correct admonition and real conviction, so that you do not grieve unreasonably and beyond measure. No matter how much you love your daughter, know that our All-Good Lord loves her more than you, who provides for our salvation in every way. He Himself testifies about His love for each of the believers in Scripture, saying: even if the wife forgets her offspring, I will not forget you (see Isa. 49:15). Therefore, try to moderate your grief for your sick daughter, casting this sorrow on the Lord: as He wills and deigns, so He will do to us according to His goodness. I advise you to communicate with your sick daughter with a preliminary confession. Ask your confessor to question her more prudently during confession (2, part 1, pp. 173–174). M. can be treated with medical means. But this is unlikely to help. Because there are spiritual reasons here. The first is that he took the wrong side of his mother, and therefore was embarrassed in the wrong way. And I think he was punished for this. Or maybe there are one or two more spiritual reasons that you can think about, but it’s inconvenient to write. And therefore, for him, the best thing is sincere confession and spiritual admonition. Sorrowful temptations are in any case useful. It is said in the psalms: When He killed them, they sought Him, and soon turned to God (Ps. 77:34) (2, part 1, p. 190). ...For patiently enduring illness, both mercy and forgiveness of sins are granted (1, part 2, p. 55). God does not require physical feats from the sick person, but only patience with humility and gratitude (1, part 1, p. 48). You are worried about K.’s poor health, and you are afraid that she will die soon. God be merciful! In the monastery, the sick do not die soon, but drag on and drag on until the illness brings them real benefit. In a monastery it is useful to be a little sick, so that the flesh rebels less, especially among young people, and less trifles come to mind (2, part 1, p. 32). In sorrows, you pray to God, and they will go away, but you cannot drive away the disease with a stick (1, part 2, p. 49). M. any illness is serious, especially cancer, but there is nothing to be done, one must submit to it. God knows better than we do which disease is suitable for the purification of passions and sins. It is not in vain that Saint Ephraim writes: “Pain is more painful than illness, but vain illnesses are fleeting diseases.” You yourself know that this disease mostly comes from an anxious state of mind... (2, part 1, p. 57). Strengthen yourself in the Lord and in the power of His strength. Devotion to the will of God is always necessary and useful for us, but in illness it is even more necessary. Then only we can be calm and can maintain faith and trust in the mercy of God, which saves sinners who repent and humble themselves together, like the tax collector who was not angry with the Pharisee who humiliated him. Man’s anger does not create God’s righteousness (James 1:20), much more than an angry disposition is harmful to a sick person. It is always useful to remember and say the psalm word to the Lord: It is good for me that you humbled me (Ps. 119:71). And at other times - “All this is worthy and righteous, I suffer for my sins” (2, part 3, p. 70). You write that you are afraid of getting healthy, and then again you will have to fall into the rumor of various concerns, albeit for obedience. I think it is unlikely that your former health will return to you; Therefore, I advise you not to rely on going to church recklessly, which is why you fell ill again, but rather manage to save yourself in a cell, under the pretext of illness, than you can get rid of many worries. At times, for obedience, settling monastic scores will not be a vain or very difficult task, and yet you will not live in the monastery completely idle, but the thing is this: they will bring scores, you will settle them and pay them, and then be at peace (2, part 3, p. 114). About your brother who is mentally and physically sick, I will say that his physical illness is of great benefit to him. If he dies of consumption, do not be sorry. If consumptive illness does not enlighten him and convert him to faith and God, then nothing else can bring him any benefit. And you yourself know how painful it is to continue living with suspicion towards everyone - and it’s inconvenient to express. Consumption, or rather the consumptive state, turned many to God (2, part 3, p. 119). I am very sorry about your upset health. We should not be embarrassed about the cause of illness: the Holy Fathers command us not to look for who and why we find sorrows, but to endure complacently. Thanking God and humbly bearing will not only atone for our weaknesses and carelessness, but will also impute our own guilt into our justification. The permission of God, which comes to our benefit through the wise Providence, flows from us. He who avoids voluntary sorrows, says Mark the Ascetic, falls into involuntary ones. – And yet to our benefit and to our admonition, but not at all to embarrassment (2, part 3, p. 134). You write about your complex illnesses and that you lived with your parents as girls. So what? After all, you weren’t the only girl who lived with your father and mother, but you, perhaps, made a vow to remain a virgin - that’s a different matter. If you promised to remain a virgin and then get married, this is not allowed, and for such actions there are often punishments from God, similar to yours. You don’t write clearly about this, but as your illness progresses, it is clear that there is something abnormal in the affairs of your life. There is no need to travel a lot. The Lord can heal you with every miraculous icon, and every saint of God can also help you with his prayers to the Lord. But everything is in God and by God. There is a punishing disease for which there is only one cure: to rely on the will of God and endure until He desires to have mercy. Keep this in mind. And go to St. Tikhon and Fr. John of Kronstadt is allowed. And when you are in the Tikhonova Hermitage, you must, from the age of seven and throughout your entire life, repent and confess before your confessor, partake of the Holy Mysteries and receive special holy oil. The Sacrament of Unction has raised many hopelessly sick people from their beds, in addition, it cleanses forgotten and bewildered sins, and then rely on the will of God (2, part 1, pp. 171–172). It is clear from everything that the illness was caused by the fact that he leaves the church and rarely joins in communion. Now, if he wants to improve matters and be healthy, then for his previous negligence let him participate in all fasts, i.e. four times a year, and let him diligently attend the church of God on Sundays and holidays, then, undoubtedly, he will be worthy of God’s mercy... (9, p. 429). Chronic illnesses, both physical and mental, are difficult to treat, but with God everything is possible, only patience and humility are required. Moreover, you must explain your weaknesses and actions definitely, explain it that way, if you feel something else, pass it on, then the healing will be better done with God’s help, but you should not be cowardly, but patiently wait for betrayal from the right hand of the Most High (2, part 3, p. 73). A monk should not undergo serious treatment, but only receive medical treatment (1, part 1, p. 48). ...According to the word of the patrists, those who benefit from treatment should be treated more humbly. But not receiving treatment at all does not constitute any virtue; it only shows the measure of faith. However, from many experiences it is noticeable to which of the monastics the disease will become attached, no matter how you treat yourself, you will not be cured at all: painful attacks remain, humbling and burdening the monk. And from all this it turns out that a sick monk can be treated, but all worldly concerns should be put aside for a complete recovery. Remarkable words of Ephraim the Syrian in the Slavic dialect: “Pain is more painful, but vain diseases pass by” (2, part 2, pp. 165–166). You write that N. and E. are being treated with kumis. I sincerely wish that this treatment will help them. But I will say that when things go down, kumiss doesn’t help either. However, only unsuccessful treatment does not help physically, but for the soul it brings great benefits: firstly, it humbles a person, and secondly, it reminds one of the future life and the transition to it. No matter how much you live, it is inevitable to die, and you also have to give an account for your life, according to the apostolic word: We will all appear at the judgment seat of Christ (Rom. 14:10) and Each will receive his reward according to his labor (1 Cor. 3:8). And enduring the disease is a lot of work. It is not without reason that those who sin are given over to the destruction of the flesh, so that the spirit may be saved on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ (1 Cor. 5:5), when they bring sincere repentance for their sins (2, part 1, p. 52). You might be interested in: