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When choosing an abbess, one should rely on the will of the archpastor As for the choice of the abbess, when it happens beyond your expectations, then look, most revered mother, do not choose anyone, do not use your will, although you have foreseen worthyness and talents - but rely on the will of the archpastor. And if you use even the slightest amount, you will not escape temptation. We and others have seen this quite experientially: whoever chooses whom, she will be the first to drink the cup of temptation from oppression. And if, beyond your aspirations, they elect you, then try in every possible way to renounce this great yoke - when they convince you under duress, then the Almighty Lord is omnipotent in helping you bear the unbearable burden. And when someone accepts even the slightest desire and delights in this lust, God’s help is not enough for him - look at the 4th part of the Philokalia of St. Nicetas Stephatus, 2nd centurion, chapter 58, which worthily shows about this - and it will be enough for you as a precaution. Temptations sent from God are useful You write about the reasoning that comes to you that people become wise through adversity - it is true: the temptations sent to us from God are definitely useful; from these we recognize our weakness, and can judge sensibly about our neighbors, and we see how small our faith is when we are only complacent, when we receive good things, and when they are taken away, we lose heart. Temptation came from a malicious enemy because she did not reveal all her thoughts We wish you to rejoice in the Lord and ask you not to be discouraged and not to be surprised that this temptation was allowed through the action of a malicious enemy to try and recognize our weaknesses, so that we would not philosophize and think something about ourselves, but would humble ourselves and give ourselves under the strong hand of God, and strive to confess our thoughts. Temptation requires patience, recognition of one's sins and self-reproach. Tell Evdokia Petrovna Domogatskaya that her temptation requires patience and awareness of her weaknesses, recognition of her sins and self-reproach, so that God will despise and pacify those who are hostile to her. And if he treats himself with contradiction, nonsense and resentment, he will bring more persecution and sorrow upon himself. Every temptation is overcome by humility, self-reproach and patience And as you yourself know very well, every temptation encountered is overcome by humility, self-reproach and patience. You know that in response to every temptation, humility, self-reproach and patience are victory. We will not be afraid even if we are fought by confession We will not be afraid, even if we fight through confession; it is better to deal with bodily uncleanness than to fight with pride, and although we fall in battle, do not leave the place of battle: then we have much greater need for a doctor. The fear of God compels us to confess sins What worries you most of all and you reproach yourself is that you care more about pleasing your mentors than God, that the thought that you must confess every sin to me holds you back more than the fear of angering the Lord. These thoughts lead you to arrogance. Is it not for the fear of God that you repent of your sins before God, having as a witness His servant, to whom you entrusted the keys to solve and knit. St. John Climacus writes in the 4th degree: “The soul, reflecting on the confession of its sins, is restrained by it, like a bridle, from lawlessness; for we, without confessing our crimes, continue, as if in darkness, to shamelessly repeat the revealed plagues...” This opinion is contrary to yours. Therefore, you cleanse yourself of passions and sins, you do not lose anything, but you gain piety and peace of conscience, not thinking that you received this by itself, but through the prayers of another; But many who walked the high path fell in a great fall. Judge, is it because of my fear that you refrain from sins? I'm not a heart expert. If you hide something from me, I will not exact it from you or denounce you, and you have nothing to fear from me. From this you see that the fear of God forces you to confess your sins, and, consequently, to refrain from them, and not mine. You see yourself as prone to arrogance - as much as possible, try to reject arrogance, and having completely rejected this thought that bothers you, be peaceful and calm. The Holy Fathers commanded the novices to generally confess all their sins from their youth But in order for you to provide for guilt and protect yourself and those who follow your wise instruction, you deign to question our badness with true revelation about previous attempts, although they were confessed to confessors, but the burden of burdens from conscience is not lightened; но обременяетесь и смущаетесь, т.е. are not satisfied as they should be, and it is clear that not so to the skilled confessors to whom you confessed. And therefore St. The spirit-bearing fathers set the new beginning for those who came and wished to perceive the monastic angelic image, so that from their youth they would generally confess all their sins and thereby cleanse their conscience and soul, and again lay a new foundation, i.e. having been cleansed and relieved of such a burden, one can easily accept the funeral feast of obedience. “So I, a great sinner, advise your love to ask and pray to the Most Merciful Lord and God, so that by his providence he would send you such a spirit-bearing father, to whom you could confess all your sins from youth to this age and who could instill in you the importance of them. Although we are now unable to satisfy them with penance, we can at least satisfy them with due repentance and tears, for which we will appease the Most Merciful Lord, so that he may relieve us of the burden and give us courage and strength to be able to fight against the universal enemy of the devil. When the Lord, through your faith and zeal, deigns you to be such a spirit-bearer and you do the above, then you will see inside your soul peace, and joy of heart, and tenderness, watering and comforting you with invaluable consolation. Желание исправления без благого начала мертво есть I read your letter - you still write that you complain about yourself about your lack of correction and ask for the prayers of the saints for consolation. I praise your desire and wish that the worthy fruit of correction and repentance will grow in your heart, but know that desire without deeds will not be of any use, just as “faith without works is dead” (James 2:26), just like desire without a good beginning is dead. Not only we sinners, but also the saints themselves are unable to help those who themselves do not try to correct themselves. Try in your anger to rely on God’s help and you will be saved, and the Lord will help you in everything, to whom I entrust you and your entire family. Guard your conscience and reveal evil thoughts I received your Scripture, from which it is clear that there was no compulsion in you and me to correct our lives for spiritual edification, and therefore you become extremely depressed because you do not follow the advice that is beneficial to your soul. However, although they will make a good start with the help of the Almighty about their sobriety, the most important thing is not to soil your conscience, and to reveal all bad thoughts to your brother, and thereby protect yourself. Instructions for improving your life Do you wish to receive, through my badness, instructions for correcting your life. I do not refuse to write to you for the healing of your soul. From the writings of St. Father, you yourself see that through your behavior you are depriving yourself of the heavenly kingdom, and the pleasures and benefits here. But how can we restore the holiness and innocence of the first state? I ask you, do not despair about your salvation, but trust in God’s boundless mercy. Humble yourself before God and people, ask your brother for advice. The Lord looks upon the one who asks and the humble, but resists the proud (cf. James 4:6). I entrust you to the goodness of God and advise you to pray to God to send you help, and I will remain thirsty for your salvation. Trials happen by God's permission for the knowledge of human weaknesses Your attempts, about which you write, usually happen with God’s permission for the knowledge of our human weaknesses. We do not want to do any good deed without God’s help, and when we think that we have done something pleasing to God, then from this very opinion our deed is no longer pleasing to God. We must expect trials and humble ourselves We received your letter, from which we saw that your embarrassment, with the help of God, had passed. And henceforth there is no need to be embarrassed and exhausted, but we must expect trials and humble ourselves. Read from St. Isaac the Syrian "The Word about Wars and the Covering of Weakness." It can be very useful for your organization; and in other books there is much that is necessary and useful for you to strengthen yourself - in the “Philokalia” - Callistus and Ignatius. Tests are sent according to strength, not higher We see that the Lord always visits you with sorrowful incidents, but to you they seem grave according to your dispensation; However, know the great love of God for you. Although He will save you, He teaches you through these adventures, sending you according to your strength, and not above it. If there were nothing, then other kinds of passions would rebel more strongly and confuse you. Thank God for everything that He, through His wisdom, arranges for you. You might be interested in: