Первые дни пастырской деятельности в Кронштадте

Fr. JOHN was the great chosen one of God, and therefore everything in his life, even small and insignificant, from our limited point of view, was sealed with the seal of God’s especially close providential assistance. Dear priest was intended by the Lord God in order to become a spiritual fortress, a defense of Orthodoxy from various misconceptions and sects of other faiths, to be a quiet haven for those overwhelmed by the waves of the worldly sea, to be a luminous beacon showing the way to the Kingdom of Heaven; and therefore he had to undergo pastoral service from the beginning to the end of his life in the seaside city of Kronstadt, where there is a fortress, a pier and a lighthouse. Kronstadt is a city enclosing the capital, and with it all of Russia, on the North-Western sea side. And this place, reminiscent of constant guard against the enemies of Russia, became a stronghold, a stronghold, a quiet haven for souls overwhelmed and agitated by diverse passions in the sea of ​​life. This All-Russian fortress, this city of enclosure has become doubly glorious and venerable since the ascetic of faith and piety matured in it, who began his service with love for his neighbors, everyone, not only for ordinary parishioners, but also for the dregs of society, for the homeless, alienated, destitute, for despised people; and he always thought and prayed about them: after all, they are our brothers, and for them Christ shed His blood, and they have a soul, and repentance is inherent in them, and they needed and always need the warmth of a Christian heart and in the light of a sympathetic word. It was such people that the great righteous man, Fr., loved from his youth. John; for such love for such outcasts of society, during it, he was the subject of mockery. But the surrounding evil and the stench of everyday life did not affect the pure soul of the good shepherd. And it is not surprising: the sun, with its light and warmth, penetrates into dirty and stinking places, but it itself is not darkened or cooled by them - in a word, it does not lose its light and brightness. This was the case with Fr. John. The heart of man sees the Lord (1 Samuel 16:7) and the Lord knows His own beings (2 Tim. 2:19). And so, He, the Most Merciful and Just, magnified His mercy over Fr. John, a strict guardian of his soul, a gracious spiritual father and physician to the ailing, weak, and falling, but who repented and did not reject his call and timely help. Fr. began with deep reverence. John his pastoral service. When performing his first priestly service, dear priest addressed the people with the following edification: “I am aware of the height of the priestly rank and the responsibilities associated with it; I feel my weakness and unworthiness to undergo the highest priestly service on earth, but I trust in the grace and mercy of God, which heals the weak and replenishes the impoverished. I know what can make me more or less worthy of this rank and capable of passing this title. This is love for Christ and for you, my beloved brothers. That is why the Lord, restoring the renounced disciple to the rank of apostle, asked him three times: “Do you love me,” and after each answer: “I love You,” he repeated to him: “Feed my sheep, feed my lambs.” “Love is a great power: it makes the weak strong, the small great, the insignificant venerable, and the previously unknown and stranger quickly becomes close, and known, and amiable. This is the property of pure, evangelical love. May the Lord, who loves everyone, give me a spark of this love; May He kindle it in me with His Holy Spirit!..” From the very first days of his priestly service, the young Kronstadt priest showed a special love for pastoral church preaching, for frequent services, and for broad and loving help to the poor. With the greatest willingness he performed church services for other priests, at all times, without excuses, he went with spiritual needs to the Kronstadt poor, brought light, joy and spiritual consolation into their poor homes, often remained for a long time among them, talked with them, consoled them and warmed them with his love. There were often families so stricken by poverty and illness that there was no one to go buy bread, no money to invite a doctor or buy the necessary medicine, and the great ascetic Fr. John himself brought them bread, and the spiritual doctor, at his own expense, invited physical doctors to the sick, and he himself bought for them and gave them medicine. Kronstadt at that time was a poor city. About 40–50 years ago, all the poor people who had no shelter were sent here from the capital. Among them, however, there were often unworthy people, but there were much more truly unhappy people, wretched people in the full sense of the word, who truly needed the most sincere regret and participation. Every time he left the church after mass, he gathered long rows of people waiting for alms, and no one returned from here empty-handed. These poor people and sufferers to whom he was so close, all these sufferers, burdened with all kinds of misfortunes and grief, who received both spiritual and material help from him, and of whom there are so many in our lives at every step - they carried him on their shoulders from the darkness of condemnation and slander of ill-wishers and raised him to the height of his well-deserved and hard-won glory, which now surrounds his name. And Fr. had these sufferings. John, oh, so many! His whole life was so unusual, so amazing that those who in his worthy shepherding could see an eloquent condemnation of their own negligence took up arms against him and began to condemn him, they began to call him a holy fool, they laughed at him, they reviled him, they slandered him, and reproaches and reproaches met him even at home... There were many of these bitter moments, an internal difficult struggle, but the inspired shepherd did not lose heart. This is the true Christian selflessness of dear Father Fr. John and his concerns for the poor and needy very often put him in a very difficult position: giving everything to the last shoe, he doomed himself and his wife to extreme need, but was unchanged... “I am a priest,” said Fr. John, what's going on here? This means there is nothing to say: I belong not to myself, but to others.” His young wife Elizaveta Konstantinovna, as if by vow, turned - at first, though not without grumbling - into a sister of mercy to her husband in his high service to his neighbor. During all these years they saw each other for almost a few minutes a day, when Fr. John appeared at home late in the evening or early in the morning. “There are enough happy families, Lisa, without us,” he usually said. And you and I will devote ourselves to serving God.” Kronstadt at the time when Fr. John, it was a special city. In the 60s, Kronstadt served as a place for the administrative deportation of vicious citizens, incompetent due to their depravity, mainly philistines and various rabble. These people are called “posadskys,” and in the time we are describing, city residents suffered a lot from them. It was not always safe to walk through the city streets at night, risking being attacked and robbed. For Fr. John's work meant that there was a unique field of activity that required a special person. Of course, one could simply ignore all these townspeople as some kind of “scum,” but the good shepherd, Fr., could not do this. John. It was the waste that he first of all turned his attention to. The townspeople lived, for the most part, in the most remote streets, in dugouts. These were scary corners. There is darkness, dirt, sin here. Here the seven-year-old is depraved and a thief. Even the festive cross was never lifted into the attics. Not a single priest came here with prayers on the Bright Resurrection of Christ. And, behold, a ray of some other, new world, a priest of the living God, bursts into this “dark kingdom”. The great righteous man Fr. John “opened” the attics: he opened them, as if some kind of “new” land. He does not disdain sin, he is not afraid to get dirty with other people's dirt. No, he loves it. It is necessary, he thinks, to love every person both in his sin and in his shame... “Love every person, despite his sins. Sins are sins, but the basis in man is one - the image of God. Others with obvious weaknesses are angry, proud, envious, stingy, money-loving, greedy, and you, too, are not without evil, perhaps even more of it in you than in others. At least with regard to sins, people are equal: everyone, it is said, has sinned and deprived of the glory of God, everyone is guilty before God and we still need God’s mercy towards us. Therefore, loving each other, we must tolerate each other and leave each other, forgive others for their sins against us, so that our heavenly Father will forgive us our sins.” “We must honor and love the image of God in every person, not paying attention to his sins; God alone is holy and sinless; and how He loves us, what He has created and is creating for us, punishing mercifully and having mercy generously and graciously!” “There is no need to confuse man, this image of God, with the evil that is in him, because evil is only his accidental misfortune, illness, demonic dream, but his being - the image of God, still remains in him.” Evil people are sick people, and the sick should be pitied more than the healthy. And here's Fr. John comes to shacks and dugouts not with you for ten minutes, but to the Christian soul - to a perishing brother; he stays here for hours, talking, crying together. The first impression he makes is, perhaps, a feeling of constraint, hindrance, and a desire to get rid of it. His first days and months are greeted with rudeness. But dear priest has a long-tested remedy. These are children. Remember how St. Leonty of Rostov acted. When the adults kicked him out, he turned to the children, influenced their hearts and minds, and then through the children brought fathers and mothers to God; approximately the same way Fr. often acted. John. He did not want to act through children, making them a means. No, the children simply brought together the soul of the parents, who was rude, but loving towards their children, and the soul of the shepherd, full of love for both children and parents. Father John caresses the children, and they trustingly cling to the priest, and the parents also reach out to the children. In essence, these slum savages are often children too, they are happy to respond to affection - just not right away. “I was then only twenty-two, twenty-three years old,” one artisan says in a letter. “Now I’m an old man, but I remember well the first time I saw Father.” I had a family, two children, the eldest was three years old. I got married early. He worked and drank. The family was starving. My wife slowly collected from all over the world. We lived in a crappy kennel at the end of the city. I come one day, not very drunk... I see some young priest sitting and holding his little son in his arms and saying something to him - affectionately. And the child listens seriously. It may be a sin, but it still seems to me that the priest was like Christ in the “blessing of the children” picture. I wanted to swear: they were wandering around... but the priest’s eyes, both affectionate and serious at the same time, stopped me. I felt ashamed... I lowered my eyes, and he looked, looked straight into my soul. He started talking. I don't dare tell you everything he said. He talked about the fact that I have paradise in my closet, because where there are children, it is always warm and good, and that there is no need to exchange this paradise for the children of the tavern. He didn’t blame me, no, he justified everything, but I had no time for justification. He left, I sit and remain silent... I don’t cry... although my soul feels the same as before tears. My wife is watching... And so, from then on I became a man.” Of course, they didn’t give in right away. John's tramps. At first they could see in the priest’s conversations a whim, something like entertainment from having nothing to do. But these suspicions were soon dashed. The selflessness of the great righteous man Fr. John showed who they were dealing with. Kronstadt residents often saw their shepherd returning barefoot. More than once, parishioners of St. Andrew's Cathedral brought boots to mother, saying: take them, here, otherwise yours gave them away, he will come barefoot, we bought them... he shouldn't walk around like that. It was this selflessness of the “man of God” that attracted him to Fr. John to his first disciples. The tramps began to look for him. Every day, early in the morning, after mass, Fr. John, leaving the church, was surrounded by a group of poor people asking for help in various needs, mainly material: one needed a dress, another needed a few kopecks for food, and a third’s boots refused to serve. Father John listened patiently, asking everyone about their family and children. “Involuntarily,” writes one biographer, “it appears to the eyes: his kind, spiritual figure with a clear, piercing gaze fixed on the petitioner. “Are you not deceiving me, brother of Christ?” - Fr. asks with warm love, but in a stern tone. John. “I don’t have much money, but you see how many people need help.” The petitioner begins to assure him of the truthfulness of his words, and ends up with Father John, to the best of his ability, giving him money, or he himself goes to the local market and there buys a dress, boots, and finally food, in a word, depending on what is most necessary for the petitioner at the moment. There were, of course, cases of deception. Distributed by Fr. John until there was not a penny left from his salary and income even for lunch at home. The other one is in place. John, of course, would have been satisfied with both the material and spiritual help that he could provide without harm to himself. O. John could not. He knew that many were hungry and did not want to ask, but he needed to approach those who were spiritually perishing. And while “the poor in spirit and body” began to look for him, he himself continued to search for “the needy and burdened with grief and sins.” His custom of visiting the light is touching. Father John subsequently had the custom in the evening from 11 to 12 o’clock to sometimes walk along the streets of Kronstadt. He asked himself not to be disturbed at this time: he was praying. The same thing happened, of course, in the first years of pastoring. But after this prayer, on the way home, he sees a “light” in some hut. “Ogonyok” - they don’t sleep, maybe what a grief, and oh. John comes in, talks, weeps with those who weep and rejoices with those who rejoice. And many times a light was lit in the souls of many for the first time after this visit “by the light”. “Fr. comes. John to a poor family, says Zybin; he sees that there is no one to go even for food supplies, because from one corner come the painful groans of the ailing mother of the family, from the other the incessant crying of half-starved, frozen, sick children. Father John himself goes to the shop to buy provisions, to the pharmacy for medicine, or brings the doctor, in a word, surrounds the unfortunate family with purely related care, never, of course, forgetting about material assistance, leaving there his last pennies, of which he himself had too little at that time. He left there constantly joyful, touched, with a firm faith in God’s mercy and, hoping that the Lord would send him the means for further good deeds, remembering the word of Holy Scripture: “the hand of the giver does not fail.” Most of all, dear Father Fr. John helped his spiritual children with chores. He used to give the authorities no rest until they hired one of his “unfortunates” and, of course, got his way. A purely biblical scene of the relationship between Fr. One of our Kronstadt interlocutors draws John to his first flock. In summer o. John loved to talk outside the city. He will come there to the lawn with “his children”, sit on the green grass and begin his speech about God, about His Son, about love and mercy. There are children at his feet. He hugs and kisses. One climbed onto his lap. Adults, some standing, some sitting... So the days passed; and so the townspeople immediately decided that he was a saint, and to a saint in Russia all souls and all secret thoughts are always open. And oh. John became his own in the homes of these poor people, already at their call, at their request. The poor began to invite him vied with each other, looking for more than just monetary help. St. John never refused these requests for a visit, satisfied the one in need, came, sat for quite a long time, instructing him in Christian teaching and, in the end, did not hesitate to taste the poor man’s meager meal, remembering the words of the Apostle: “Let them eat what is offered.” Needless to say, going down to the townspeople’s dugouts, Fr. John did not pass by suffering souls from other layers. Here is the story of one Kronstadt merchant. “While still a young man, I lost my wife, who left me with a young son in my arms. I grieved greatly. At times I even reached the point of despondency. Not only did the loss of my beloved friend torment me; I was almost more tormented by the thought of my future fate. I felt and realized that I was unable to raise my six-year-old son, who, as one would expect, without maternal supervision and left to his own devices, began to play pranks and play around. There were losses and omissions in trading. I began to consider her idle. For whom and for what, I thought, should I trade? My son is still so small, and what else will come of him? The complete disappointment of life began to overcome me. To get rid of the oppressive melancholy, I began to seek solace outside the house in wine and, unbeknownst to myself, became a drunkard. Time passed. My little son grew up on his own, I was almost not involved in trade at all, leaving the shop to the clerks, and was only waiting for an opportunity to completely put an end to it. One day I was walking down the street in the morning and I saw Fr. John, must be straight from the cathedral from mass. He met me, blessed me, and said: “I’m coming to you, brother: I need to talk to you a little.” We arrived at my apartment. Father sat down and said: - I feel sorry for you, servant of God! I've been watching you for a long time. I wondered if you would come to your senses, and decided to finally come to your aid. Listen to me, throw off the blues, It is the enemy who is trying to catch you. If you don't improve, look, things will get worse. Stop drinking, don’t leave home unless absolutely necessary. Don’t think about quitting trading, but do it yourself. Remember that you are not alone. You have a son, do not ruin him and yourself. It's time to teach him. Teach you to read and write, take them with you to the shop, teach them little by little how to do business; and you will have more fun, and with God’s help he will learn to do the job, he will be a man, your helper, and in his old age, your breadwinner, your consolation. Do you hear, start from today. It's enough to wander the streets doing nothing. You were a man, and remain a man! With these words, the priest stood up, put on his stole and said: - Well, we need to pray to get things started. Let us pray more fervently to the Lord God, so that He Himself will help us to repent and come to the mind of truth. And he began to pray. With tears he prayed for me, a sinner. Then he blessed my son and me, promised to visit and pray for us, and left. It was as if I had woken up from a long, heavy sleep; and our apartment became dearer to me. With tears of remorse, I hugged my son. Only then did I feel how guilty I was towards him. After all, he almost completely ruined him. With the blessing of the priest, he set to work. Father really visited me, caressed and instructed my son. The trade situation improved within a year, and I became a “man” again through the prayers of my dear priest.” (I. Taisiya. Fr. John as a shepherd). “I, spoke about. John to this merchant, I’ve been watching you for a long time.” But Father John doesn’t need to watch for long. This sensitive soul, full of loving responsiveness, immediately noticed who needed support and help, and he, without embarrassment, went to the sick soul, bringing healing, although this soul was unfamiliar to him. “Fate made me suffer early... and languish with life,” says one girl. – Since childhood, I have not been loved by my family. By nature sickly, undeveloped, incapable of anything, but pampered, nervous, I was a burden both to others and to myself. They sent me to college. But even from there, after three years, he was expelled due to his inability to learn. At the time I was expelled from the institute, my father was no longer alive. My mother, a sickly woman, did not have the means to support me the way we lived under my father. We spent our days with her in hardships and sorrows. But, finally, my mother dies, leaving me alone, completely without any means of subsistence. Where could I lay my head? I stayed with some relatives, then with others, then with friends. Unable to find a secure shelter anywhere, I moved from place to place. At one time I was visiting Kronstadt. And here I was bored. One day it became very difficult for me, and during one walk I began to think about a plan on how I could stop my useless and painful state. Sitting in such a sad mood, I did not notice how the priest came up to me and, bowing warmly, sat down at the other end of the bench. Not knowing him, like anyone else in Kronstadt, and not wanting to share my difficult mood with anyone, I got up and wanted to leave. But a priest I didn’t know stopped me and said: “I’ve bothered you, it seems. Excuse me, but, passing by, I could not help but notice the heavy mood of your soul, testifying to your deep sorrow, and, as a shepherd, although unfamiliar to you, but not alien to the rank of shepherd, I decided to approach you and talk with you with a feeling of sincere participation. Do not hesitate to reveal your sorrow to me. Perhaps through me, a sinner, the Lord will calm you down and comfort you.” Touched by such participation of a person completely unknown to me, I cried bitterly, but could not say anything except one thing: “I’m unhappy, superfluous in the world!” “The great mind of the Creator could not create anything unnecessary,” answered the priest. Pointing to a bug crawling along the sand, he continued: - Look, what is more helpless, more insignificant than this insect? But it is not superfluous, and it brings some benefit, and it is not forgotten or abandoned by the Creator! And you, being a man, this beloved creation of God, despair of His mercy! Tell me your sorrow, tell me what happened to you. Here I poured out my whole soul before the good father. It seemed to me that no one had ever spoken to me with such sympathy, no one had consoled me so much. He seemed to me like an Angel sent by God to save me from death, to which I was already so close. He talked to me with sincere fatherly love. He encouraged, consoled, showed me the path of life, which I follow to this day, without ceasing to thank him. He did not reveal his name to me, calling himself one of the cathedral priests. When, having returned home, I told about my wonderful meeting and conversation with some priest, they told me that it was undoubtedly Fr. John. At the same time they added: this is a wonderful, holy man.” The main source from which Fr. John drew strength that revived other people’s souls, and that was, of course, prayer. All his hours were devoted to prayer. At that time he did not have such fame as he has now; consequently there was more leisure than subsequently. His nights were free, but he devoted them to prayer for others. Fr. John, when passing through Peterhof, often stopped with me, Fr. D. S-ov. In the morning you will ask: how did you sleep? - Thank God, good night. Healthy. My head is fresh. “And I knew that he didn’t go to bed until the morning.” You can read how he prayed for others in his diary. “Infants Pavel and Olga, through the infinite mercy of the Lord and through the prayer of my obscenity, were healed from the spirit of infirmity that possessed them. Little Pavel's weakness was resolved by sleep, little Olga received peace of mind, and her dark face became clear. Nine times I went to pray with bold hope, hoping that my hope would not be disgraced, that it would be revealed to the interpreter, that at least for my persistence the Lord would give me what I asked for; that if the unjust judge finally satisfied the woman who was troubling him, then how much more will the most righteous Judge of all satisfy my sinful prayer for innocent children, that He will look at my work, at my walking, at my prayer words and my kneeling, at my boldness, at my hope. That’s what the Lord did; he did not disgrace me, a sinner. I come here for the tenth time and the babies are healthy. I thanked the Lord and the most swift Intercessor.” And it is natural that from the very first year this prayer gave the shepherd that faith that moves mountains and creates healings, the faith that Fr. John considers it obligatory for the shepherd. “The servant of God,” he says, “when performing Divine services and sacraments, must be firmly convinced that as soon as he thinks and says something, it will be done. It is so convenient and easy for the Lord to fulfill our requests, to create or implement something according to our word. Let this conviction be strong and natural in you, like your breathing with air, like seeing with your eyes, like listening with your ears.” And he had this faith; and is it surprising that he “experienced for himself a thousand times that this is exactly so; I experienced that there is no gap between the words: “speech and was, commanded and created”, that they are true in all their strength.”