Послание 42. К Анне, монахине

I thought that my blessed mother had already died, but it turns out that she is still on earth. Truly, is it possible to do more than what you did, prompted by maternal concern for me, humble? Although I am a sinner, I believe that the Lord will reward you for our unworthiness with no small grace and receiving what you desire and ask for. However, enough has been done. I spoke about this in my previous letter. But you suffered even more costs for donations. How could we not remember your piety now? With clothes, sacred offerings, food and drink - you have amazed us with everything. Therefore, put an end to gifts and be in good hope of Divine reward. For He who said that He will reward “a cup of cold water” is not false (Matthew 10:42). You say that you are upset by the care of your son, which distracts you from the proper care of your soul. God is strong - and he will arrange the affairs of his beautiful son, and he will give you leisure to fully engage in spiritually beneficial things, so that you can meet your departure from the body with a ready heart. Can't you fast and work when you have a sick body? Endure this without sorrow, offering what is possible to the Lord and making up for the lack of asceticism with an abundance of humility. You want to learn how you should pray. The Lord Himself taught this with the words: “Our Father” (Matthew 6:9), also commanding that they should not ask for anything temporary, but for His kingdom and eternal righteousness. In addition, the Fathers are commanded, firstly, to thank God, secondly, to confess sins before Him and then ask for their forgiveness and the achievement of other means of salvation. So, when you intend to pray, then thank the Lord and Master for the fact that He brought you from non-existence into existence, that He delivered you from all delusion, calling and worthy to be a partaker of the knowledge of Himself, from pagan delusion, from heretical delusion, then for the fact that He prepared you for the beginning of monastic and equal-angelic life after enjoying public life. Thinking about this will sufficiently dispose the soul to contrition and shedding tears. From here comes enlightenment of the heart, delight of the spirit, striving for God, and when this abides in the heart, then every vice is driven away. When you have thus offered gratitude to God, confess to Him, saying: “You know, Master, how much I have sinned before You and how much I sin every hour,” recalling such and such a sin both in knowledge and in ignorance, however, without indiscriminately listing what, through intense remembering, can cause harm to the soul. From here the grace of humility will come to you with contrition of heart and fear of God's retribution. After this, ask, sigh, beg your Lord for the forgiveness of sins and strengthening you for the future to please Him, saying: “More, my Lord, Lord, I will not anger You, I will no longer love anything else except You, truly worthy of love; and if I get angry again, then, falling to Your mercy, I pray to grant me strength so that I can please You.” If the thought appears to you of doing something else good, ask earnestly for it. After that, call on the Most Holy Theotokos so that She may have mercy on you, the holy Angels, that Angel who is the guardian of your life, so that he will protect you and protect you, the Forerunner, the apostles, all the saints and those whom you especially usually call upon, and the one whose memory is celebrated on this day. This, it seems to me, is the power of prayer. And although everyone can pray in different words, and not the same ones all the time, for the one praying in himself does not always say the same thing, but the power of prayer is necessary for everyone, in my opinion. Stay awake, praying for what is due, constantly improving yourself and presenting yourself pleasing to the Lord with a strict life. You might be interested in: