107. Память об отсутствующем благодетеле

It happens that a person receives many benefits from another person, and remembering his benefits, he always remembers the benefactor, and out of love and gratitude for him and his friends reminds him of him. A grateful heart always remembers the benefactor and his benefits, but an ungrateful one forgets both the benefits and the benefactor, as it is written about the ungrateful Israelites: And they forgot His benefits and the miracles that He showed them (Ps. 77:11). And since a grateful person remembers his benefactor and his good deeds, he often boasts about him to his friends, and shows them the good deeds of his benefactor, and says about him that he did such and such good to him; built him a house, gave him clothes, freed him from such and such trouble, and so on. This means that his heart is grateful to the person, his benefactor. Likewise, a Christian must always remember God and His countless benefits and say to himself in his soul: My God created me and brought me from non-existence into existence, and gives me such and such goodness. The luminaries that I see - the sun, the moon and the stars, by His command, illuminate me, unworthy, and show me the way day and night, and with their help I avoid evil and all harm. Oh, how poor I would be, and no different from a blind man, if they hid from me! The air that I inhale into myself and exhale from myself serves me by His command and preserves my life. I would have disappeared immediately if he had disappeared from me for even one minute. Clouds, which, like bottles, contain water within themselves, and are transported from place to place, and irrigate the air and the earth, serve me with His favor. What would be the benefit to me from the fruitful land and from the seeds sown in it, if it were not watered by clouds from above? The land would be barren, and I and my animals would disappear without food, as happens during times of drought and famine. This house, in which I live and rest, and hide from bad weather and storms, His almighty hand made for me. How bitter my life would be if I didn’t have it! His goodness took care of this too. The food that I eat strengthens my weak body and is comforted; His generous hand gives me the water with which I quench my thirst and refresh myself. How could I live if He did not open His treasures and give me His blessings? This garment, with which I cover and warm my naked and poor body, is sent to me by His holy and all-powerful hand. How could I walk naked and be unharmed by the cold and frost? His love for mankind took care of this too. His fire warms my house, and cooks my food, and illuminates me in the night. His all-powerful and generous right hand filled the lakes, rivers and springs for the sake of me and my livestock, and produced in them many different types of fish and all kinds of animals for my needs. I see various kinds of herbs and potions in the fields and steppes. By His command the earth opens its treasures. Both give both to me and to my livestock, from them they provide healing to my weak body, and they serve as food for my livestock. He planted various trees, and they serve my various needs. By His command, various birds, livestock and animals multiply, and from them I receive food, clothing, and other various benefits. He drives the winds away from His treasures, and they cool me and my cattle during the heat, purify the air, drive away the clouds and make the sky clear. By His omnipotent word there is day and night, the sun rises and sets, it rises and there is day, it sets and leaves night. The day serves me, and the night also serves: during the days I work and go out to my work and my work until the evening (Ps. 103:23); at night I give rest to my weak body, and thereby gather new strength to carry out the work of the next day, and so on. He sent me His holy word, like a merciful king sending a letter to his servant, through His servants, chosen and sanctified men. His Word illuminates me, living in the darkness of ignorance, and, like a lamp, shines on me and shows me the right path, and teaches me to distinguish darkness from light, evil from good, flattery from truth, harm from benefit, sin from virtue, superstition and unbelief from faith, deceptive bliss from the true, madness from wisdom, wickedness from piety, and thus instructs and makes me wise. In it I see who I am and who is the One who so mercifully and philanthropically provides for me. In Him I see that I am a creature, and He is my Creator. From Him I had the beginning of being and will have the end. He has neither beginning nor end, and just as He did not begin, He cannot end, and He alone is immortal. In him I see that like all the ends of the earth, so I am contained in his almighty hands. In him I see that He provides wisely for all creatures, especially for man, and for me. In this I see that heaven and earth and everything in them are the work of His hands. The sun, moon and stars that shine for me are His work. The air that revives me; the clouds that water me; the earth that bears fruit for me, and on which I live; waters that cool and serve me; the fire that warms me and cooks my food; animals that work for me; the trees that serve my needs are His handiwork. The house where I rest; food and drink with which I strengthen my weak body; the clothes with which I cover and warm my naked body, and so on are His blessings. He gives me all this. His holy Word teaches me how to live, what to do and what to avoid, how and with what to please Him. And he shows me my weakness, and exposes my sins, and threatens me with His judgment for them, and so brings me into fear and humility, and convinces me to repent, regret my sins, and with contrition of heart, run to Him, seek mercy and pray: God! Be merciful to me, a sinner! (Luke 18:13). But he also encourages, revives and comforts me, who trembles and has a contrite heart and fears His judgment, so that I will not be consumed by sadness and will not completely despair of receiving His mercy. Because in His word I see that He opens the doors of His mercy to all poor sinners who turn to Him and repent of their sins, and humbly fall to Him, and ask for mercy, and accept them. If he has mercy on everyone, then he has mercy on me, since I am one of them. If He is for the good of all, then He is also for me; if He is philanthropic to everyone, then He is also to me; if He is merciful to everyone, then He is merciful to me; if He accepts everyone, then He accepts me too. If He saves all those who believe in Him, then He saves me too, since I also believe in Him. Where, O beloved, where is He who benefits you so much? Where is the One who loves you so much, Who shows you such love? Where is your great Benefactor, Who shows you so many benefits? Where did you go? Where does he live, stay and be located? Tell me, tell me, beloved! - He's everywhere. And not far from me, but near me, although I do not see Him, and because of this I grieve and regret that I do not see Him who loves me, my Benefactor. Being established in the body, we are removed from the Lord, for we walk by faith and not by sight (2 Cor. 5:6-7). I see His goodness, but I do not see the Giver of goodness. I receive blessings from His generous hand, but I do not see the Benefactor. I see heaven and earth and everything that is in them, everything that His hand has created, but I do not see Him Himself, the Creator. His sun, moon and stars shine for me; Its air, clouds, rivers, lakes and springs serve me; His land gives birth to various trees, herbs, flowers and fruits for me, but I do not see Him Himself. With His invisible hand He sends me all kinds of good things, but I do not see Him Who sent Him. He opens His treasure and gives me food, drink and clothing, but I do not see the Giver: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. His all-powerful hand protects me from the machinations of the enemy, but I do not see my Guardian. He is my refuge, my Intercessor, my Helper, my affirmation in various temptations, troubles, misfortunes and sorrows, but I do not see Him Himself. I feel help in His intercession, but I do not see the Helper and Intercessor. He protects me while I am awake during the day, and He also protects me while I sleep at night, but I do not see my Guardian. Whether I am sitting in the house, He is with me. Whether I leave the house, He does not leave me. Whether I go along the path, He is with me. Whether in a city, in a village, in the desert, whether I am with people or without people, He does not depart from me, but I do not see Him: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. Whether I do anything, or say anything, or think, I do everything before Him, but I do not see Him: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. Whether in church or at home I stand in prayer, I stand before Him, but I do not see Him: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. He looks at me and sees me, and sees how I sit down and how I get up, and understands my thoughts, but I do not see Him: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. Before Him I bow my knees - and I fall, and I worship, and I sigh and pray to Him, and I ask and seek His mercy for myself, but I do not see Him: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. I stretch out my hands to Him, and lift up my eyes, but I do not see Him Himself: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. I thank Him as my Benefactor, I sing to Him, I praise Him, I bless and extol Him, but I do not see Him Himself: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. I also feel His holy hand touching me, unworthy, but I do not see Him Himself: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. He strikes my heart with His holy fear, and therefore I fear and tremble before Him, but I do not see Him Himself: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. He also touches my heart with holy love, and then my heart feels joy, joy and exultation, but I do not see Him who loves me: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. He punishes me and has mercy on me, like a loving Father, He saddens me and comforts me, but I do not see Him Himself: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. I hear His holy word, and I hear in it that although the church of my body will be destroyed, it will rise, will be recreated and will not be destroyed forever, but I do not see Him who speaks: for I walk by faith, and not by sight. When will I come and appear before the face of God? (Ps. 41:3). When will I see the One whom my soul desires? (Ps. 41:2). When will I see the One on whom the Angels do not dare to look, Whom the Cherubim and Seraphim sing with surprise and horror: Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord of hosts (Rev. 4:8)? When I see Him, to see Whom is eternal life; to look at Whom is one consolation, joy, joy, sweetness and exultation; to stand before Him not by faith, but face to face (1 Cor. 13:12) is inexpressible glory, honor and bliss; to be with Whom means to be in unceasing bliss, sweet life, joy, gladness and unceasing rejoicing? When will I come and see my Creator, my Provider, my Benefactor, the One who loves me, my Redeemer, my Helper and Intercessor, my Deliverer and Savior, glory, honor, joy, joy, consolation and my eternal bliss? As a deer longs for springs of water, so does my soul long for You, O God! My soul thirsted for the mighty, living God: when I come and appear to the face of God (Ps. 42:2-3). Remember me, Lord, in Your kingdom! (Luke 23:42). You might be interested in: