Письмо 63

Your dispensation is very mixed, both laughter and crying, but they do not happen in the same house; because of your pride and vanity, your crying is not true; read it yourself from St. John Climacus about crying, and you will see that it only infuriates you, and does not lead you to humility: in true crying there is no heaping, and you also have the fruit of it - blasphemy; the most necessary means for you is to reject your will and reason; from this humility is born, and pride is destroyed. The obedience given to you - to write, you must accept with great humility and zeal: it benefits the entire monastery, and you will recognize your weakness in the face of reproaches; Just guard against contradictions as much as possible and do not reject accusations, and when someone rejects correct or incorrect accusations, his salvation is rejected, according to the word of St. John Climacus. How wonderful you are! If you want, take it out and give it so that you can see salvation in the palm of your hand! You get bored in church: why is that? God comforts the humble, but you do not humble yourself, but condemn others, and not wanting to bear the burden of the cross, you want to die; this desire is not according to Bose; you are full of passions, and how will you appear there? Be distracted by their self-reproach and humility, consider yourself the last of all and unworthy of consolation; When you feel like this, you will be saved, which is what I earnestly wish for you. Mnogohreshny I.M. December 1. You might be interested in: