Письмо 262
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I no longer know what means to give you to peace with M.N.? When you have self-justification and accuse others of slander, then your heart will always be alien to peace; and when you reproach yourself, although you are absolutely not guilty of anything, but also for the fact that you cannot bear the sorrows that you vowed to endure before God and the Holy Gospel, and remember whether there were any previous worldly sins, and all this, by inflicting sorrows, God wants to cleanse you; and you resist it; read all the chapters in the 1st part of the Philokalia of Mark the Ascetic; there you will find that it is very necessary to endure sorrows, and there is great benefit from them, and not only must you endure what is your fault, but what they say falsely and insult: but what kind of patience is that? Also read the 20th word of Saint Isaac the Syrian; and there are many such plasters that heal our ulcers, but we do not take them and remain unhealed. May the Lord enlighten and strengthen you and guide you on the path of salvation, which I earnestly wish for you. Mnogohreshny I.M.
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