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Do not be faint-hearted: encourage your soul with faith and trust in the Lord Regarding your cowardice, which often seems to weigh down and burden your soul, we, although many sinners and indecent in all parts, ask and pray to your love not to give yourself over to sadness and despondency, but to try in every possible way to encourage your united soul by faith and trust in the merits of our Creator and Redeemer, our Lord Jesus Christ, Who not only created us and from nothingness into He brought into existence, but with His dearest blood He redeemed Him from slander. To console and confirm your complacency, I place here verses from the 33rd Psalm: “I sought the Lord, and heard me and delivered me from all my sorrows. Come to Him and be enlightened, and your faces will not be ashamed. This beggar cried out, and the Lord heard and saved him from all his sorrows. The Angel of the Lord will encamp around those who fear Him and deliver them. Taste and see that the Lord is good. Blessed is the man who trusts. The righteous cried out, and the Lord heard them, and delivered them from all their sorrows. The Lord is near to save the brokenhearted and humble in spirit. Many are the sorrows of the righteous, and the Lord will deliver me from all of them. The Lord protects all their bones; not a single one will be crushed by them. The death of sinners is cruel, and those who hate the righteous will sin. The Lord will redeem the souls of His servant, and all who trust in Him will not sin” (Ps. 34:5-9, 18-23). So, most venerable, by virtue of these verses, let us trust in the Almighty, and with His omnipotent right hand He will strengthen all our infirmities and strengthen our steps to the creation of His holy and life-giving commandments, to the healing of our souls, to the ascension of His eternal Divinity visually. Don't despair: if you fall, rise up You explain that quite often, as the weakest in humans, you are overcome by cowardice and slander. But what to do... When this happens to you, like a person walking along the ladder of virtues, sometimes you will be crawled by the above-mentioned passions. But, however, with the help of God, let us rise again with repentance and knowledge of our weaknesses and again with hope and trust in the help of the Almighty Lord! And if we are sometimes oppressed by sorrows and rumors coming or other unpleasant wines, then again we will rise up and sweat. And the Most Merciful Lord, seeing your long-suffering, careful course, will take revenge in every possible way on your rivals, your enemies, who are fighting you, and will grant you deep grace for the complete victory of our mental and sensory adversaries. Avoid cowardice and impatience We have received your Scripture, from which it is clear that your cowardice and impatience possess you, from which you yourself are distressed and you are driving your servants into bitterness. And we, the indecent ones, seeing your such poverty of soul and body, gradually sympathize with our hearts about your situation. And although indecent in everything, we dare to ask and pray to the All-Bountiful and Greatly Gifted Lord, may he send down on you from above His gracious affirmation, patience, self-reproach and humility, so that you may be granted a good beginning with trust in His almighty help to live according to His holy will and His holy and life-giving commandments to the best of your ability. And may the Merciful Lord of peace and love protect you, and may he establish you, and may he strengthen you, and may he protect you from all the snares and slander of the enemy, and may he forgive you all your sins, voluntary and involuntary. Don’t be cowardly, but thank God for sorrows and troubles We see that even after offering it you have not yet calmed down, but you are overcome by cowardice! But let me, as a most sincere daughter, say yes, and for better understanding and understanding, ask your love: please tell me, do you really think that these permissions were allowed without God’s will? Truly, we must thank the Most Merciful Lord, who is all wise for us, the poor, who builds and heals our souls, sick with vanity and pride! For confirmation and consolation I place here St. Isaac the Syrian from the 35th word: “The daily way of God is the cross, but no one ascends to heaven weak. This is the way of the Lord.” And it ends: “Whoever has given God to himself with all his heart, God never wants to be carefree. This is the Lord who cares about the truth. But from this it is clear that God provides for us to eat whenever he sends him everlasting sorrows.” And again from the 36th word at the end: “The Lord knows that it is not powerful for those who exist in bodily peace to abide in His love. And for this reason, forbid them from that peace and sweetness.” And from the 37th word: “Every person benefits from temptation. If temptation takes advantage of Paul (the apostle), every mouth will be stopped, and God will be guilty of this. The ascetics are tempted to give up their wealth; the weak, let them protect themselves from those who harm them; Those who are sleeping should prepare themselves for excitement; those who are far off, let them worship God; let them move in with boldness.” So, these expressions of the inspired man exhort us to complacency and courageous patience! And therefore, you are obliged not only not to be faint-hearted, but also to thank the All-Merciful God for all the necessary sorrows and troubles, and with hope to ask the Lord for patience, and to speak the words of St. Prophet David: “In sorrow I remembered you, Lord, and in little time your punishment is upon us.” A daughter should not be taken away from serving God And Anna, when her mother took her, let her obey her; Apparently, the time has not yet come for her to be installed in the monastery - God wants to tempt her desire. She can consume food according to her will, it will be on her conscience, but there is no need to be bored and it is better to ask God, so that he himself will arrange for her, whatever the news is for the benefit. Her mother will see from the consequences whether she did good by taking her and taking her away from serving God. This is the very thing that makes a daughter bored and unsettled; shouldn’t it crush her heart and serve as a punishment for her? And if, God forbid, she falls into any vices, then who will answer for her? God bless her to learn to read and write. To serve the Lord, try to untie yourself from the world In order for you to be calmer and more comfortable to work for the Lord God, try to untie yourself from the world, part with your people, from whom you not only receive no benefit, but are also in danger of giving an answer to God for them when they sin in some way due to your oversight and inattention towards them. When you are free from them, then you will no longer need to enter into their position regarding the division. However, when enmity has settled in a family, it is better to live apart: due to their ignorance, it is difficult to pacify. Beware of addiction to the world Beware of addiction to the world, although it flatters you with peace and consolation, they are so short-lived that you will not see how you will lose them, but repentance, melancholy, despondency and no consolation will take place. You say that you want to be even the last in the monastery - do it: when someone reproaches you, think that you are the last and worthy of this. May the Lord grant you, according to your will, the accomplishment of good deeds in your endeavor. If you want to leave the world, rely on the will of God - do not rely on your strength and your mind. By your writing you inform me about the journey undertaken by your wife to the God-saved city of Kyiv for the veneration of St. saints, as well as to test themselves in the residence of the travelers who live in the mountain city, who want to disgrace themselves with the Heavenly Bridegroom Christ. The intention is good, may the Lord give her His help in fulfillment of her intention to devote her life to serving God, leaving the vanity of the world. This is good, but it requires God’s cooperation, help, and your diligence. Although you think about yourself that you have a firm intention to fulfill this vow, do not rely on it, but instead surrender to the will of God and ask for His help. You are still unfamiliar with the enemy’s intrigues and deceptions: he tries to confuse and tempt people, which is allowed by God for our humility, so that we do not rely on our own strengths and our own reason, but in this, the latter, would obey experienced and skillful people who themselves have actively walked this path - but now my words are still unclear to you. When the Lord grants you to accept upon yourself “His light burden and His good yoke” (Matthew 11:30), then you will actually understand and know the power and benefit of my words, which comes from the rejection of your will, and its submission to another, for the sake of God and the salvation of your soul. The desire to leave the world is strengthened by everyday trials You write that upon receiving my unworthy letter, you reproached and cursed yourself a lot. You, it seems, are destroying yourself unnecessarily and as a result you are falling into despondency and pernicious sadness, and therefore I ask you and pray that you strive with complacency, patience and hope to continue the days of your life and at the same time thank the Most Gracious Lord, who in His mercy has granted you such comforting feelings and care for your poor souls for salvation. And with grateful feelings, the Greatly Gifted Lord is strong and omnipotent, at the end of good edification, to arrange your fate and, according to His perfect will and mercy, to arrange for your children in every possible way, only we, according to the apostolic testament, may patiently strive for the feat set before you (Heb. 12:1). And that now it seems difficult and silent to you to continue living in the world and for this reason you are so bored that, it seems, you would fly on wings to the quiet refuge you desire; but, O most dear, let it be known to you that your present life will serve you in the future for your benefit, namely, if the Lord, in His mercy, deigns you to live in monasteries, then in time there will be mental battles from the common enemy, will bring back and remember your former life and imagine it in pleasantness. And now you think carefully, taste its sorrow to satiety, then you can reflect the thoughts of the enemy, who want to confuse everyone! Prayer must be done with attention And what you felt during prayer, in your opinion, the opposite in feelings, you felt this because when you did the worship, the body was in motion and you felt squabbles and abuse in it, because the mind helped little, and the spiritual strength also helped little due to weakness. And when you listened with one mind and focused your mind spiritually into prayer, then the All-Merciful Lord most sensitively helped you. Without conquering passions, you cannot receive consolation from prayer You, having tasted through the mercy of God the sweetness and consolation of prayer, now not finding yourself in yourself, are embarrassed, despondent, consider yourself to be the culprit of this loss and your negligence - this is the true truth. But I find here the Providence of God, which has taken away this consolation from you. Without conquering passions, is it possible to preserve this wealth without harm? And isn’t it given to you for your benefit, so that you don’t fall into delusion? You live in the middle of the world and vanity, you cannot reconcile yourself, and humility is a storehouse. Try in any case to fulfill the commandments of Christ, and recognize your weakness, and having recognized it, humble yourself, but do not seek reward for fulfilling the commandments; It is better to consider yourself obligated to fulfill this, but unworthy of the reward. If you pacify yourself this way, you will not lose God’s mercy. When you rely on prayer alone without doing the commandments, you will not succeed in the least, as St. Macarius: “If we are not adorned with humility, simplicity and goodness, the image of prayer will not benefit us” (chapter 13). Constantly force yourself to every good deed and to all the commandments of the Lord, even if there is no sin and desire for creation in your heart, that is, force yourself to humility before all people and consider yourself worse and less than everyone. In the same way, to be merciful, benevolent, compassionate, good, as far as possible, forcing ourselves to do so, and so, now with violence and reluctantly we do it with our hearts, we will then get used to every good deed. The enemy rises up against you for your heartfelt prayer, but do not submit! The temptation you described comes from the devil’s envy. In the Philokalia in the chapters of Mark the Ascetic about those who think they will be justified by works, in chapter 88 it is said: “When the devil sees that the mind has prayed from the heart, then he inflicts great evil temptations.” It’s easier to say, the enemy rebels against you for your heartfelt prayer and wants to turn you away from it, but you don’t submit to him. This temptation will pass with the mercy and help of God, only you do not present evidence against the enemy’s thoughts, because, according to the word of the Climacus, the evil enemy can, for his part, present you with many objections. Just continue to pray, trying not to listen to the enemy’s thoughts and despise them, repeating the sweetest name of our Lord Jesus Christ. St. Climacus writes: “In the name of Jesus, beat the warriors, for there is no stronger weapon either on earth or in heaven.” Do not oppose your enemies, but think to yourself that the Most Holy Son of God, during His earthly life, ate and lived with sinners, and did not refuse to dine in the house of Simon the leper, and allowed the harlot who appeared in the city to touch and kiss His Most Pure Noses. If the light of the sun, passing through unclean places, radiates to many and is not damaged, how much more will the great mercy of God greatly consume all the unclean sins of every repentant Christian soul. Only those who, out of pride, do not want to repent will go to hell. If Manasseh, who committed so many iniquities and corrupted many people, received forgiveness, then let all repentant sinners dare, especially since Manasseh, bound with iron bonds, seemed to involuntarily repent: unable to bend his physical knees, he bowed only the knees of his heart (Compare 2 Chronicles 33). In a word, to put it briefly, do not answer your enemies, but just pray and pray, calling on the sweetest name of our Lord Jesus Christ, who came into the world to save sinners, for help and mercy. But the enemy’s stupid talk, there is nothing to do, just be patient and bear with it - through this one gains spiritual experience. Know and remember firmly. Say the Jesus Prayer with spiritual freedom, and not with despair The Jesus Prayer should be done with spiritual freedom, and not with despair. Stop doing it mentally, and go through it verbally as much as possible with humility. Preparation for entering the monastery If only when the Most Merciful Lord grants you firm and unanimous hope and desire to completely leave the world and everything in it, and, at the invitation of the Lord Himself, deny yourself and, having taken up the cross, follow His life-giving life (cf. Matt. 16:24), yes, it seems that the circumstances of your events bring you closer to this, then if, with the assistance of grace, you decide to do this, please write to us. Upon receipt of this, we, with God’s help, will ask the benefactors to pay the debts for you, as much as you agree. And for your residence we choose a nunnery in Kaluga, in which our bishop and mother Abbess Angelina have a sober and abstinent life, gifted with prudence, and are partly familiar to us. Kaluga is 60 miles from our hermitage, the abbot of our monastery often comes, and the brethren are also sent for necessary purchases. However, although you are determined to leave the capital, we advise you not to let rumors spread about you until the time comes. Ask who you should if it is possible to send a pension to you in Kaluga. Meanwhile, having come to us in Kozelsk, if the Lord pleases us and we are alive, we will personally discuss what is necessary, and thus everything will be confirmed. How to convince your parents to let you go to a monastery. Prayer is a means of spiritual success Of course, everyone will be distracted from the pious path of the only self-sacrifice to which the Heavenly Father calls you, and not only will they entertain you, but they will also persecute you, and, perhaps, oppress you. You are required to be patient, long-suffering and generous. So, try to prove your zeal for God not by competition, but by humility, silence, meekness and reverence. Keep your heart, devoting it to God, listen and hope, be unshakable in your will, and Almighty God will arrange the best for you. If necessary, use oil only in moderation. You are not yet a nun and have not fully entered into the monastic life, although, however, your name has already been written down among these by the God of peace and the Father of bounties. I repeat to you that it seems that you must endure temptations from your relatives, but be ready, and God will not leave you. Convince them with more favor to let you go to the monastery. Preserve and contemplate prayers more, for they are the most sacred means to obtain spiritual success, all the gifts of the Most High and the treasure of devotion to God. Reflect also on the love and mercy of the Lord Jesus Christ for us, for you want to be united with Him forever and reign in the house of the Heavenly Father. In all other respects, I entrust you to Divine protection, wishing for peace and salvation. If you are not accepted into the monastery, ask the Lord: He is strong to help We received your writings dated March 8 and March 15 along with Daria’s writings. She asked with the first mail for an answer what she should do. The abbess does not accept her into the monastery - what to do when the Lord does not tell her. Tell her that we have no will in this, and not only could we not write to her with the first mail, but now we don’t have the time; tell her this, let her ask the Lord - He is able to instruct her what to do. With the Lord “many are called, but few are chosen” (Matt. 20:16) Through the Voronezh young man you know, your writing to me, the worst, received everything correctly in due time. This presenter you mentioned was definitely jealous to stay with us, but jealousy, although good, God knows in what end it will happen, because he is very enterprising and ardent, and, it seems, not grounded. He was suddenly very pleased to stay with us; he just as quickly liked everything about us too much. But woe! That soon the zeal faded away. And again I say that the Lord alone knows at what end his beginning will take place, his ordinary beginning: “many are called, few are chosen” (Matthew 20:16), according to the word of God. Even to the last minute of this life, we must tremble at temptations, not being faint-hearted against them, but humbly begging the Lord to complete the beginning of our salvation. This young man stayed with us for 4 days and left for Moscow from us. We don't know at all where he is now. About monastic trials I inform your love that the maiden Matryona, known to you, who lived as a worker, entered the Kaluga nunnery. These days I received a letter from the nun with whom she lives. She notifies that Matryona has seizures, and I can’t argue otherwise that this nun is one of the noblewomen and a very strict enforcer, and Matryona of a humble character remained silent, suffered internally and brought herself to such misfortune. Pray for her, and don't talk too much to others. About moving to another monastery You write and, out of your unlimited zeal and well-disposed faith, question my badness, that because of the temptations you encountered in the holy monastery you inhabit, you intend to give place to anger and ask my despondency, so that I, feeble-minded, will confirm your intention. I, being in extreme weakness and almost uninterrupted with many activities, asked your brother in spirit, Mikhail Ivan, to write my permission for your love, which together with this you will read. But just in addition, please, with complacency and long-suffering, listen to some explanation from my indecency, since in our monastic rank the holy fathers limited the transition from one monastery to other monasteries and explained the faults for which it is allowed to move and about which I am not able to explain to you in detail due to weakness, and, due to your new leadership, I do not believe there is any absolute need, but only for your information I indicated and I will mention little and ask you You. If you are allowed a similar sorrow, which you were still haunted by in your worldly life, that is, they slander you, slander you, slander you, reproach you, and your heart lies in the monastery and in some old woman, to which you refer and explain your accumulated thoughts - and this should establish peace within, and sorrow from the enemy is allowed in from the outside in order to upset your inner peace. When there is no such feeling inside, then it is necessary to change the place for the necessary honor, and you have the right to find something more convenient for you to gather your feelings and save your soul. Leaving the monastery, it is impossible to remain peaceful Glory to the Most Merciful Lord that He gave you the feeling to return to the monastery, which was completely wavering. Even if you remained in the world, what do we care about this: people live in peace and are peaceful, but you, having already devoted yourself to the life of the monastery and leaving it, could not be peaceful, and it is doubtful that the brothers would always support you, maybe they were zealous, but the circumstances did not work out, for you can’t rely on a person other than the One God. Living in a monastery, although it is meager, is more convenient for humility, and you will be humbler better. Which monastery you are most invited to is of little use Father Ioannikiy writes that he submitted a petition and was refused: he was ordered to allow him to apply to one of the Novgorod monasteries. Everyone, having learned about it, was very inviting. We advised him to be patient in the Lavra, - how the Lord will do good to us, unworthy, about this, for where there is a lot of name, there is little use, which is quite clear from experience; and where there is moderation, it subsequently turns out to be more favorable. A Christian is always on guard, guarding against mental wolves As you write, now the time is coming for doing the commandments of Christ, after which comes hope. A Christian always stands on guard, guarding against mental wolves, and when they come, do not run away from them - then one must call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ for help, beat the adversaries firmly, stand and not give in. Forgive the Lord if something is not to your liking. To this I will add, whoever does and feels according to Bose, it is not bad here and it is good there. “If you love me, you will also be loved by My Father” (John 14:21), says the Savior. Whoever is loved is the one who fulfills the commandments of Christ. You might be interested in: