39. Исправление жизни состоит в переустройстве не внешних порядков, а в духе с готовностью бороться с препятствиями. Разные способы, какими враг старается отклонить становящихся на путь истинной жизни

With your last letter you made me a real holiday. How your head brightens and the decisions of your heart take the right and saving direction! So, you decided to do everything as it should. Bless, Lord! All your plans for future new orders of life are good. But so that you don’t misrepresent this matter in the heat of the moment, even though it would be safe 7 , I hasten to tell you something to the management. See, when rearranging everything, pay more attention to the internal than to the external. For now, the external can be left as it is, excluding what, by its very essence, has a harmful effect on the heart: it saddens, breaks thoughts, fills with unnecessary desires, and the like. Perestroika, of course, must also affect external orders, but not so much in their form, but in the spirit with which it must be done. If you do this, then the external will remain the same, with minor exceptions, but the spirit will be different in everything. The benefit of not breaking the external order too sharply is that your change will not be noticeable to anyone. The second thing you need to have in mind, you already have, namely: do not think that what you have planned will easily come true. How much interference both outside and inside! And you are doing well that you are preparing to embark not on the flowery path, but on the struggle. Yes, yes! Get ready to fight and keep asking the Lord to give you the strength to endure everything that you encounter who is hostile and interferes. Don't rely on yourself. Place all your trust in the Lord - and His help will always be with you. But when you prepare to fight, do not think that you will always triumph. Often you just have to endure it, bearing one burden. You will often see that with all the desire to be in good working order, mistakes creep in and break through. Know in advance that all this is in the order of things. If you meet, don’t be horrified. Now foresee this in advance, and do not expect a different course of life ahead, as among all sorts of resistances, worries and failures. Just stock up on one thing - strong courage to stand in the work you have started no matter what. This alone must now be laid down and sealed with vow and firm determination for the rest of one’s life. And how life goes, what successes and failures there will be, how others will greet it - leave it all to the will of God. From the experiences observed in the lives of the saints, it is clear that the Lord leads differently to perfection those who cling to Him with warm love and devote their lives to Him. He allows the enemy to act hostilely, without, however, alienating His helping right hand. Everything is God. But His ways are wondrous and, most importantly, hidden. Even the leader himself sees them only afterward, looking back. How appropriate, therefore, is the everlasting prayer: “In the image of destinies, save me!” And with prayer, surrendering oneself into the hands of God is complete, irrevocable. And the enemy will not sleep. The saints of God noticed that it has a dual effect on beginners: it does not interfere with some at all and does not provide any resistance. Those, not encountering any obstacles either inside or outside and seeing that everything is going so smoothly, begin to dream that this is what we are like: suddenly all the enemies have been dispersed - and they don’t dare show themselves. As soon as these thoughts subside, the enemy will immediately arrive and begin to develop vain dreams, from which self-confidence and God’s help will be born, oblivion, non-seeking, and for that - deprivation. As soon as it comes to this, the enemy will begin to act tyrannically: stir up evil within and strong opposition from without - and the poor self-confident person falls. These cases are not uncommon. And if you please, take this into consideration now, when you are figuring out how to get organized in life, so that when you start a new life and everything goes smoothly, you do not dream about yourself, but see in this an enemy ambush - the most dangerous - and aggravate your caution and attention to the matter. Perfection, more or less visible, comes after labors and labors, after years and years, and not from the first beginnings and not from the first days. On others, on the contrary, the enemy attacks from the very first days with all his strength and swiftness, so that the one who started is lost. Wherever you turn, everything is against you: in your thoughts, in your feelings, and on the outside, you see only one thing that goes against your good intentions, and nothing favorable. The enemy does this in order to frighten the newcomer the first time and force him to abandon his good intentions and return back to a life of carelessness and inattention. As soon as he notices that the newcomer does not give in, but stands his ground, he immediately retreats. For courageous standing against the enemy deserves crowns for the workers, but he does not want to deliver them. So, keep this in mind so that in the event of a strong pressure of opposition, you do not immediately become discouraged, knowing that this is a trick of the enemy, which he will immediately abandon as soon as he notices the resistance. You are doing very well that you don’t see flowers ahead. This is the real view of the matter. And prepare to be resilient. However, save yourself. There's something else I need to tell you, but that's for another time. The deviation can be on the gum side and on the neck side (to the right and to the left). The first is jealousy beyond reason, the second is laziness. 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