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40 years old, married. How to deal with lustful fantasies about other women?translated

November 5, 2026 · 1 min read

Reader question:

Hello, father. For many years I have been worried about the problem of fornication and voluptuousness, especially when seeing beautiful women on the street. I’m almost 40, I’m married, I have a child, I’m happy with my marriage. But when I see attractive women, I feel an irresistible desire to admire them, to fantasize, to ignite my imagination. I’m ashamed, I often confess this sin, but the passion returns at the first opportunity. Sometimes, if I can’t be with my wife, I watch pictures and videos to quench my thirst. How can you resist this tendency and be more calm about the women you meet?

Alexander

Priest's answer:

Archpriest Andrey EFANOV

Dear Alexander, the spiritual struggle against prodigal (and not only) temptations must contain two most important components.

First, you should accustom yourself to keeping your gaze from temptations. Learn not to look at an object that may become a source of temptation. Our brain is able to react quite quickly to the information it receives, including visual information. And with a certain skill, you will be able to react faster to incoming information that something has appeared in your field of vision that can tempt you, than...

Source: Журнал ФОМА  ·  Read the full story →
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