Письмо 56

Although I myself am blind, I see from my father’s teachings, and you yourself have studied quite a bit; your actions were correct in prayer, and, it seems, one might say, not charming at the beginning; but since they were not dissolved by humility, obvious charm followed. Read more carefully St. Simeon the New Theologian on the third type of prayer: do you have such a preparation? Also: Hesychius, Philotheus, Nile the Faster, Callistus and Ignatius, Nile of Sora, Gregory of Sinaite, in special chapters, where he writes a lot about delusion; and St. Isaac the Syrian 2nd word: “the work of the cross is purely”; You will see that in doing this you must have extreme humility, which alone cannot be resisted by demons. Just as great is the work of prayer, so they strongly arm themselves against those who pass through it, and usually first try to seduce with arrogance and then fulfill it with their highest actions; that it seems similar to these actions on you; You, having enjoyed the effect of prayer, were imperceptibly carried away by the arrogance that you had already found a benefit that you did not have before; and here it would be more necessary to descend into the depths of humility; and the effects of delusion have already appeared. St. Isaac writes: “and those who have teachers of grace are always in trouble, fear for the sake of the rapids that are present and delusion similar to the truth”; and further says: “Don’t you dare look at the surroundings of the sun, if the apple of your eye is not clear, lest you lose that very dawn, which is simple faith,” and so on. So, I advise you: when taking on this great work, most of all, humble yourself, looking at the commandments of Christ, how far we have stood and will stand from them, and, according to the word 55 of St. Isaac the Syrian: “put yourself in the matter of repentance, and not seek high things”; and whoever does not consider himself a sinner, “his prayer is not acceptable before God.” And you seem to be overcome by the furious part; - but whoever is touched by prayer, even though the whole world insults him, he considers himself worthy of it, and is not irritated: and you, however, have humility, only in words; try to plant it in your heart, and when going through prayer, do not look for high things, but only ask for mercy: and, in such indecent actions, simply call on the Lord - His name, so that your soul does not perish from the deception of the enemy, from which may the Lord deliver you. Further, the enemy can seduce you with dreams instead of the truth; but beware of all this and reject it, as if you are unworthy; for arrogance makes up for all sins and blinds the mind. Mnogohreshny I.M. December 15, 1851. You might be interested in: