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We answer both of your letters together: although we know and believe that without the will of God the power of our head will not perish, and that by His holy will a bodily illness was sent to you for the benefit of your soul; but we were sorry for you. Now, thanks be to the Lord, who has given you physical healing, we pray that He will also grant you spiritual healing. Although you do not see your mental illness, it is there, and it is hidden from your sight; Don’t think that you can get healing soon. However, this should not frighten you; for it is better, when you feel sick, to seek a doctor, than to think that you are healthy and not worry about a doctor. You want to fervently seek Jesus and look for sinlessness in yourself, not humility; having felt some pleasant feeling, you will take it as great; and this is what is dangerous: it can seduce you to the point that you thought you would receive it untimely, but you will not receive it on time. It's dark for you, but we know it quite well. Can a recruit really suddenly become a general, or can a young man who has started his ABCs become a writer? and the one who wants to study art, has just taken it up, and has already become an artist? This art of art requires a lot of work and feat, and most of all humility. Without having been in war, you cannot know how difficult and terrible it is, and without struggling with passions, you cannot be skillful and see your weakness. We congratulate you for having dressed yourself in the attire of virgins who have disgraced themselves to Christ: although it is gloomy, it will comfortably enlighten your heart. We advise you to treat Mother Superior in everything, and not to hide anything from her, without fear of offending her. There is no need for politics here, but for truth. Otherwise you will lose a lot. We remain unworthy pilgrims, the many-sinful Hieromonk L. and the many-sinful Hieromonk Macarius. November 29, 1838. You might be interested in: