Жизнь

The wise life is both the highest and the most difficult. It is not possible for many, but only for those who are called to this by the high Mind of God, who succeed in a good undertaking. But it is also important if someone, having chosen the second kind of life, maintains integrity and thinks more about God and about his salvation than about his glory; who, acting in full view of this world, although he accepts honors as a shadow or guise of something varied and temporary, nevertheless he himself lives for God and guards in himself the image of which he knows that he received it from God and for which he is obliged to give an account to the Giver (1). The whole human life is short if we compare it with the Divine and endless nature (1). How long will we mourn him (the deceased) as one who has departed from us? Are we not hastening to the same monastery? Will the same stone soon cover us too? Will we soon become the same dust? In these short days, we will not so much acquire good things as we will see, experience, and perhaps do bad things ourselves, and then bring a general and indispensable tribute to the law of nature. We will accompany some, we will precede others; We will mourn for some, for others we will serve as an object of lamentation, and from others we will accept the tearful gift that we ourselves brought to the dead. This is our temporary life, brothers! This is our funny appearance on earth - to arise from nothing and, having arisen, to be destroyed! We are the same as a fleeting dream, an elusive ghost, the flight of a bird, a ship on the sea without a trace, dust, a breath, spring dew, a color that is born in time and flies around in time. Man is like grass, his days are like a flower of the field, so he also fades away (Ps. 103:15), - the divine David spoke beautifully about our weakness. He says the same thing in the following words: tell me the shortening of my days (Ps. 101:24) - and determines the measure of human days in spans (Ps. 38:6). What can we say in spite of Jeremiah, who even turns to his mother with reproach, complaining that he was born, and moreover, because of the sins of others (see Jer. 15:10)? I saw all the deeds (Eccl. 1:14), says Ecclesiastes, I surveyed with my thoughts everything human: wealth, luxury, power, fickle glory, wisdom that more often runs away than is acquired; repeatedly returning to the same thing, I considered again luxury and again wisdom, then voluptuousness, gardens, a large number of slaves, a multitude of estates, cupbearers and cupbearers, singers and singers, weapons, armor-bearers, genuflections of peoples, collected tributes, royal greatness and all the excesses and necessities of life, everything in which I surpassed all the kings who had come before me; and what is in all this? All is vanity of vanities, all sorts of vanity and vexation of spirit (Eccl. 1:14), that is, some kind of unreasonable aspiration of the soul and entertainment of a person condemned to this, perhaps, for an ancient fall. But the essence of everything, he says, fear God (Eccl. 12:13), here is the limit to your bewilderment. And the only benefit from life here is to be guided by the very confusion of what is visible and overwhelmed towards the constant and unshakable (1). What was happening at this time? I will gladly say, and even in the words of Scripture: a strong wind was blowing (John 6:18), the sea was agitated and howling, and the waves, as usually happens in such storms, alone, rose in the distance and gradually, reaching their greatest height, then falling, they crashed against the shores; while others, hitting nearby rocks and being reflected by them, turned into foamy, high-flying spray. Here small stones, growths 90, snails and the lightest shells were thrown out, and some were again absorbed with the ebb of the wave. But the rocks stood firm and motionless, as if nothing disturbed them except the fact that the waves were hitting them. From this I was able to extract something useful for philosophy... I said to myself: isn’t the sea our life and human affairs? And there is a lot of salty and unstable things in it. And aren’t the winds the temptations and all sorts of surprises that befall us? This, it seems to me, noting that the venerable David says: save me, O God, for the waters have reached my soul. Deliver me from the depths of the waters, I entered the depths of the sea and stormy waves drowned me (Ps. 68:2-3). As for those who are tempted, some, I reasoned, like the lightest airy bodies, are carried away and do not in the least resist adversity, because they do not have in themselves the firmness and weight delivered by a chaste mind and ready to fight the circumstances encountered; and others, like a stone, are worthy of the Stone on which we are established and which we serve. Such are all those who, guided by a wise mind and standing above the low rabble, endure everything firmly and unshakably, and laugh at those who waver or pity them - they laugh out of wisdom, they pity out of philanthropy. For themselves, they consider it a shame to despise distant disasters and not even consider them disasters, but to concede victory over themselves to the present, and, moreover, short-term ones, as if they were permanent, to show wisdom untimely, and in case of need to turn out to be unwise. This is the same as if one who has never entered the field began to consider himself an excellent fighter, or a skilled helmsman who thinks highly of his art in calm weather, but throws the helm in a storm 91 (1). Let everyone stretch forward, let everyone cling to God: whoever is wise, whoever is strong, whoever is rich or poor - let everyone take hold of this undeceiving support! Here everyone should tie their boat, especially me, who sits on a high throne and through sacrifices raises people to heaven - me, who, if I dishonor Christ in a darkened heart, is threatened with sorrow to the same extent as good glory awaits if I approach the Divine. For just as the measure of our life is measured according to God’s measures, so God’s measure is measured according to the measures of life. Reasoning this way, you will comfortably complete your life here, and then, on the day when this gloomy life is resolved, you will move from here, in the good accompaniment of God himself (2). I exist. Tell me what does this mean? Another part of myself has already passed, another I am now, and another I will be, if I ever will. I am not something indispensable, but the flow of a muddy river, which constantly moves and does not stand still for a minute. Which of these will you call me? What do you think most constitutes my self? Explain this to me; and see that now this very me who stands before you does not leave you. You will never cross the same river again that you crossed before. You will never see a person the same as you saw him before. At first I was contained in my father’s body, then my mother accepted me, but as something common to both; and then I became some kind of dubious flesh, something unlike a person, shameful, without form, possessing neither words nor reason; and my mother’s womb served as my coffin. And here we are, from grave to grave, living for corruption! For in this life that I am going through, I see only a waste of years, which brings me disastrous old age. And if there, as the Scripture says, eternal and incorruptible life will receive me, then say: real life, contrary to your usual opinion, is not death, but death, will not it be life for you? I have not yet been born into life. Why do I collapse at the sight of disasters, like something brought into its composition? This is one thing and immutable for day-old creatures; this alone is close to me, unshakable, does not age, after, having emerged from the bowels of my mother, I shed my first tear, before I touched life, mourning all the disasters that I must face. They say that there is a country like ancient Crete in which there are no wild animals, and there is also a country where cold snows are unknown. But no mortal has yet boasted that he, without experiencing the severe disasters of life, moved from here. Powerlessness, poverty, birth, death, enmity, evil people - these animals of the sea and land, all sorrows - this is life! And just as I have seen many misfortunes, and misfortunes that were not enjoyed by anything, I have not seen a single good that was completely free from sorrow, since the destructive temptation and envy of the enemy branded me with bitter disgrace (2). Oh, how long this life has been made by disasters! - How long should I sit at the pus? It’s as if all the blessings of our life are contained in one consolation - day after day, either taking in or throwing out what is measured out. Few use the larynx, and everything else becomes a drain of sewage. Still winter, still summer; now spring, now autumn alternately; days and nights are the double ghosts of life; sky, air, sea - in all this: both what is motionless and what rotates - there is nothing new for me, I am sated with everything. Grant me another life and another world, for which I will willingly bear all the burdens of labor. It would have been better for me to die when You locked me in my mother’s womb, for as soon as I began life, darkness and tears became my lot. What kind of life is this? Rising from the grave, I go to another coffin and, rising from the grave, I will be buried in merciless fire. And this time, while I am breathing, is a fast stream of a running river, in which one thing constantly leaves, another comes, and nothing is permanent. Here everything is just dust, which covers my eyes, and I fall further and further from God’s light, groping along the wall, clutching at this and that, wandering outside of the great life. I will venture one truthful word: man is God’s game, similar to one of those we see in cities. On top is a mask made by hands; when it was removed, I turned to stone with shame, suddenly appearing different. Such is the whole life of pathetic mortals. They have a dreamy hope in their hearts, but they do not enjoy it for long (2). I flowed around everything on the wings of my mind - both ancient and new; and nothing is weaker than mortals. There is only one thing that is beautiful and lasting for a person: taking up the cross and moving from here. Beautiful are the tears and sighs, the mind nourished by divine hopes, and the illumination of the Heavenly Trinity entering into communion with the purified. Beautiful are the renunciation of the foolish dust, the non-corruption of the image we have received from God. It is wonderful to live a life alien to life, and, having exchanged one world for another, patiently endure all sorrows (2). Throw everything off yourself and then cut through the sea of ​​life, but do not set sail like a heavy ship that is ready to sink immediately (2). This short and varied life is a kind of wheel spinning on a motionless axis: sometimes it goes up, sometimes it bends down and, although it appears to be something motionless, it does not stand still; when running away, it stays in one place and, holding on, it runs away; jumps rapidly and cannot move; he tries to change his position with his movement and from the same movement he returns to his previous position. Therefore, life cannot be compared with anything better than smoke, or a dream, or a wild flower (2). Fir, clay, swirling dust! The earth again unites with the earth, is wrapped in earthly shrouds and again becomes dust, like dust, which is raised high by a strong circulation of winds and then thrown down. For in the same way our whirling life is lifted by storms of evil spirits to heights - to false glory; but the dust immediately falls down and remains down until the word of the Creator brings together what was united and destroyed out of need. And now this dust, in which the spirit with the image of God is embedded, as if emerging from some depth, proclaims earthly sad songs and mourns life, apparently smiling (2). To you who will live after me, I give a commandment: there is no profit in this life, because this life has an end (2). You (worldly life) envy the virtuous, but I, spiritual life) regret the vicious; because the worst thing is to be vicious, although the path of those who flow to a disastrous end is prosperous. You despise the poor, as if they have a different God, but I know one creature, I know that we will all appear at the same judgment. And the second creation is good morality. You exalt yourself in the comforts of life, but I am humbled by fear. Difficulties exhaust you, but hope relieves me, because nothing is permanent, but everything flows away with the passage of time. Night ends the day, and day ends the night. Joy gives way to sorrow, and disaster ends in something pleasant. And therefore we should not stop attention on this as something indispensable. Nothing seems scary to you, you are not afraid of even the greatest vices, because a luxurious life prevents you from judging sensibly. But even small offenses seem worthy of tears to me, because sin is alienation from God. How can I bear it when I lose God? You have a restful sleep, the rib lies comfortably with the rib, you have pleasant dreams - repetitions of the same things that were done during the day, you drink, play corn, accept gifts, joke, laugh. But for me most of my life passes without sleep, because labor wakes up those who fall asleep. If I steal some sleep, it will be with tears. I am frightened by visions of a cruel night: a court, an incorruptible Judge, a trembling stand before the court, on the one hand - a river bubbling with unquenchable fire, on the other - a worm gnawing forever, and in the middle is conscience - this accuser who does not need written evidence. And God is God to you when He only gives success in everything, but for me He is venerable, although He also sends the opposite. For the fight against misfortune is for me a saving medicine. The more I am oppressed, the closer I come to God; suffering unites me more closely with God; for me this is a pursuing army of enemies that forces me to take refuge in the walls. Your comforters are children, wife, friends, and to lose them is the greatest disaster for you. And in hunger, and in cold, and in sorrow, my support and consolation is God. Offend me, beat me, reproach me for the meanness of my family and poverty, trample me, oppress me; You will not offend me for long, but I endure everything for God and turn my eyes to Him, stretch my thoughts into the next life, rest there, but do not know anything beyond this, and thus conveniently get rid of all sorrow (2). Consider real life a marketplace. If you start trading, you will be left with a profit, because for little you will receive something great in exchange, and for something fleeting, something eternal. And if you miss the opportunity, there will be no other time for such an exchange (2). The best benefit of life is to die daily (2). I am afraid that, having laid the foundation of life on sand, I will be destroyed by rivers and winds (2). Life is the union of soul and body, just as death is the separation of soul and body (2). The perfect painter is the one who draws true and living images in his paintings, and not the one who, having in vain mixed a lot of paints, albeit good-colored ones, represents a painted meadow in the picture. And I praise the seaworthy ship not because it shines with unnecessary decorations and colorful stern, but because the hand of the ship builder firmly nailed it together and launched it safely and boldly on the waves. And the army must be brave, not beautiful; and the house has good finishing - the second advantage after strength. So is human life: either it is divine, when fear leads a person to Christ, makes him alien to the networks of sin, constant, unentertained and carefree, or it is very vicious and internally powerless, although in appearance for a short time it has the same strength that we notice in the frenzied, for whom everything is spinning, because the thought goes around (2). Porosts are a family of underwater plants, algae. The helm is a rudder, a wooden blade suspended from the stern of the ship on hooks, and sometimes an oar for steering the ship. – Approx. ed. You might be interested in: