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Early mass. I thank the Lord, who miraculously revived me through the service of the Divine Liturgy and especially through the communion of the Divine Mysteries (I was raised from the dead by them) and who granted me the gift of performing the entire liturgy with a loud voice, with tenderness, and preaching a sermon, and collecting 18 rubles 45 kopecks for the poor. Then he served prayer services; my leg hurt. I came home about six minutes later - the doors from the kitchen to the dining room were locked: I needed it soon; I got angry and shouted at my wife: an evil demon has taken possession of my heart; For quite some time I could not drive him out completely; he preached the sermon with a somewhat embarrassed, wounded, oppressed heart; I again collected 44 silver rubles for the poor. At the prayer service, through fervent prayer, the demon finally came out; I calmed down; but my leg hurt; I took a bite from the headman at Nikitin's - and the leg went away! At Kulikov's I ate goose and cabbage pie; Ivan Matveyevich - he drank tea and ate pork and jelly - it turned out to be bad: his head then hurt badly. The next day in the morning at three o'clock I broke down: the headache went away. The cap from the Holy Sepulcher was put on his head. Glory to the Lord, who is patient with my sins. Thursday. God! I will not cease to thank and glorify You, who never ceases to deliver and save me from my sins, my sorrows and my hardships. So I, voluptuous and self-loving, was angry with the peasant Vavilov because he came to ask me as a witness to the peace officer for his wife and did not tell the world’s name and surname, forcing me to write the same thing twice and I felt bad - I knelt before the Lord, repented, and the Lord had mercy, pacified, spread, healed. Grant me, Lord, to pray in the same way for all people, and fulfill my prayers just as quickly! Remember sick Anastasia at this hour, Lord, and heal her. Amen. I accuse myself, an indecent sensualist, of gluttony and satiety; Yesterday after the bath I got carried away with sweet gingerbread treats and ate quite a lot of them at night: it turned out not good, it was burdensome; In addition, I drank a glass of tea with milk unnecessarily. I have sinned against God! Saturday. Morning eating, drinking, and generally untimely and excessive consumption of food and drink weakens my spirit and body, and sometimes, during damp weather, like today, produces a headache, with a tendency to vomit, from a clogged stomach. Oh, shameful slavery to the belly! And this is in the Christian and in the priest! Have mercy on me and again, God of mercy and bounty! Am I a man or a pig? Why yesterday, after the all-night vigil, after such an abundance of God’s grace in me, after such tenderness, such a majestic, loving prayer to God for everyone, did I allow myself to eat and drink a lot after the christening at Lieutenant Brovtsyn’s in Rusanov’s house?.. Roast beef with blood, etc.? I repent to the Lord and ask for mercy again; do not betray me to the enemy, O Lord of hosts, but also protect me. You are my shield and the pillar of the fortress from the scourge of the enemy. Yesterday I prayed to the Lord both for the humility of the merchants who fight against us and against my unworthiness and who oppose my good undertakings, and for my nephews who are in poverty due to the inability of their authorities to raise children, and for the established Trusteeship, but especially for those gathered in the church - for all Christians and for all people living in the world, so that the Lord may be known to everyone, as I was known to the most indecent by His ineffable mercy. I thank the Lord, who delivered me this morning (October 6) twice from the sorrow and distress that befell me for my anger at the poor and at home for the disorder at home: I fell with faith, hope, and fear at the throne of God - and received mercy and peace. Yesterday at the all-night vigil I thanked the Lord and for exalting me with the rank of priesthood, which there is nothing higher on earth, for standing before His throne with the apostles and saints, for performing the heavenly Mysteries of Baptism, Communion, Repentance, etc., for frequent deification in the Holy Mysteries, for extraordinary help in my service; for the countless resolution and forgiveness of my and other people’s sins, for the countless healing of mental and physical ulcers that happened to me from my sins. What sin remained unforgiven, unresolved? Which ulcer is unhealed? Glory to the Lord for everything. And no one accepts this honor of his own accord, but he who is called by God, like Aaron [Heb. 5, 4]. And I'm looking for an archpriest. I have not yet learned patience, I am still irritated by the turmoil in the house from my children and wife. But disorder must be patiently corrected - this is where you show your patience, kindness, meekness, and impartiality towards all the people who cause anger and annoyance. Love is patient and covers. Behold, by the third the Lord saved me today from confusion, sorrow, fire, and cramped conditions. Thank you for the immeasurable mercy of my Savior. Amen. It was extremely difficult for me to serve mass today because of yesterday’s meal after the christening at Mr. Brovtsyn’s - what terrible cramped conditions, what an overwhelming burden! What coarseness of heart! The minutes of mass were terrible! But it serves it right! Do not anger the Lord with gross idolatry! Appreciate the post! The tightness in my soul was so great that I could not read prayers of thanks at the royal prayer service; and I didn’t read all of the prayer behind the pulpit at the liturgy for the sake of tightness. And that’s all, all this because of gluttony! How many lessons - and everything is numb. Yesterday at Shchegolev's christening I ate more proper bread and herring. Oh, womb! Corrupt and vile god! Foul demon! I thank the Lord for His indescribable mercy towards me on this day, for at the beginning of the liturgy he delivered me from the sorrow and cramped conditions that resulted from Deacon Sofronov’s non-arrival at the proskomedia; I forgave him, justified him by the deeds of everyday life, as a family man and father, I sincerely asked for forgiveness from the Lord, and peace was established in my heart. Again I celebrated [mass] safely, but felt not entirely healthy; after communion he miraculously revived, strengthened, and was healed; from the unfulfilled release (due to demonic confusion) the maternity wife Grechukhina again felt cramped, but with the life-giving Mysteries, on which I placed my hope, the Lord again had mercy. And he accomplished the entire sequence of the funeral service, farewells, and dismissals without stumbling. When I came home from the gymnasium, the archpriest upset me with his slander to the dean and his pickiness. The fact that I did not raise paintings about schismatics 115. Judge him, O Lord, quickly according to his wickedness. Lord, let me not fall into the parable of rebellion! God! help me! Listing (obsolete) – a written list of something. The clergy, in addition to confessional lists, kept records of schismatics, recording information about those who did not belong to the Orthodox Church. You might be interested in: