Январь 1869 г.

January 7. I thank the Lord, who surprised me with His mercy and power during the liturgy through my prayer and crushed all the power of the enemy in me and gave me the opportunity to partake of the Divine meal for cleansing of sins, sanctification, peace and sweetness. I thank the Lord, who saved me several times from my bitterness, from the sting of prodigal behavior and from the thorn of selfish gain (two christenings, the unction of Golubev with V.M. Yaroslavtsev). Gloriously glorified in me is Christ my God. The Divine Body and Blood renews me, revitalizes, cleanses, sanctifies, pacifies, delights, strengthens soul and body. The performance of Divine Baptism is the same. Grace to work for the Lord. This means that it is the devil who always works terrible intrigues in us in order to prevent us from serving the Lord worthily. Why are Jesus Christ and the Most Holy Theotokos written on the right and left sides of the Royal Doors? Remember the words of the Lord: I am the door: whoever enters by Me will be saved [Jn. 10, 9]. Think the same about the Lady. Why do the clergy open and close the Royal Doors? Because they are the doorkeepers of the Kingdom of Heaven and they have been given from the Lord the power to open and close the Kingdom of Heaven for people. The devil, with his all-destructive, hellish breath, darkens the eyes of the heart, oppresses the soul, as if fettering it, constantly seduces with various sins: pride, vanity, malice, envy, stinginess, covetousness, gluttony and greed, induces despondency, fear, doubt. If the Lord were not in us, no one against us would be able to overcome the enemy's battle: the victorious one ascends from here 48 . You, who suffer from satiety and drunkenness, gambling and smoking tobacco, give what is unnecessary for you - the rubles and pennies that you use for your excesses - to the poor, so that you may be healthy mentally and physically. Atone for your sins with alms. Do I still throw myself greedily at this rubbish, do I still burden myself with food and drink, do I still thirst for money and perishable clothes? Are the chambers still wide? Oh, imperishable, heavenly life! When will I desire you with all my heart and hate corruptible life, ceasing to love corruption? When will I destroy the lust of the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the pride of life? Our idols: a) our flesh: all kinds of sacrifices are made to it and because of it all the commandments of God are broken; b) sweets and food and drink in general, when we have an addiction to them; c) money or wealth; d) clothes, places of entertainment - theaters, clubs, etc., because of which we neglect the church of God, the salvation of the soul. To love God with all your heart - that is, to place all your goodness and bliss in God, to cleave to Him with all your heart, to resort to Him in all difficult circumstances of life and to give thanks for all the blessings, for all the sorrows, misfortunes, since everything tends through His providence towards our eternal good. To love God with all your heart means to always pray from the depths of your soul, with all your heart, to hate sin with all your heart, with all your strength and strength, to do good deeds with all your zeal and willingness; crucify all passions diligently, mercilessly, despise the flesh as the source of sin, and love the soul as the image of God, and devote it entirely to God. I thank the Most Holy Lady Theotokos, who mercifully heard me and saved me from spiritual sorrow and distress for my sin of opposition to the archpriest and irritation with him (in absentia), which came upon me (I asked to serve Matins before a certain time for no reason). Glory to You, most swift Intercessor, fulfilling everything in Your Son. I thank You, Lord my God, for through Your many mercy You saved me upon awakening at four o’clock in the morning, when malignant suspiciousness troubled and oppressed my heart (regarding the archpriest’s father), and when I repented of my self-will and surrendered to Your will, asking You to teach me Your ways, You pacified my heart. How much the suspiciousness induced by the enemy harms me! How the enemy disguises the faces of our colleagues and presents everything about them to us in black form! Isn’t the destruction of the clergy in Russia 49 the work of the Jesuits of Paris or Napoleon III himself, an adherent of the clerical party? Will our Orthodox faith be shaken by this?.. But, Lord, You watch over the Orthodox Church! Queen of Heaven! Guardian Angels, all saints! You are awake over the ark of holy Orthodoxy! Submit every person to the judgment of God and do not take revenge on anyone, either in feeling, or in thought, or in word, or in deed - and endure insults and pray for those who do the offense. You see what Kronstadt society is like, how cruel it is towards the poor! How wasteful and pampering it is, loves to host balls, masquerades, card parties, and dances! Will you be friends with such a society? But whoever wants to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God [Jas. 4, 4]. I thank You, Most Holy Lady, most gracious and quick Intercessor, for through my whole-hearted prayer you quickly heard me and stood up sovereignly and saved me from cramped conditions and embarrassment before the all-night vigil on the 12th of January on Sunday, and you gave me Divine grace to perform the entire all-night vigil without stumbling. I thank You, Lord my God, as You have granted me warmth and warm prayer, and You have granted me warmth and warm prayer, and You have granted me the entire All-Night Vigil without stumbling. I thank You, Lord, for all the strength You have shown and are showing in my weakness, in my lasciviousness. Glory to the riches of Your goodness and bounties, the riches of Your power! Looking at the altar cross and the Lord of glory crucified on it, I remember and glorify the infinite, surpassing all mind, love of God for the world and for me, a sinner, the mystery of the salvation of the world from eternal death and the mystery of the deification of human nature through the incarnation of the Son of God and our adoption to God and the eternal inheritance of eternal bliss. The Church is one spiritual body. Oh, what a consolation! If we live piously by faith, then the Most Holy Theotokos, and Jesus Christ Himself, and all the holy forefathers, fathers, prophets, apostles, hierarchs, martyrs, our reverend and God-bearing fathers and all the saints are one with us! Oh, what a celebration! What a joy! What labors, what torments, what vigils of soul and body, what 50 prayers, what fasts, their holiness, their divinely inspired creations, writings cost the saints, and we, foolish and ungrateful, neglect their writings, and their names, and their lives: we do not want to read them, imitate their lives! Sources of living water for people are found with us - the priests! How dear and respectable priests should be to the laity! But they alienate us, and through us they alienate themselves from the Church, and from God, and from eternal life, and dig for themselves leaky wells that cannot hold water [Jer. 2, 13], – theaters, clubs, gambling and dance evenings. How much consolation faith brings to a Christian! Oh, Alma Mater 51, holy faith! How comforting and life-giving are your commandments! What a blessing it is to fulfill them! How sweet it is to cry with tears of faith, tears of heartfelt contrition for sins in the face of the Savior, the Mother of God! January 15, 1869. Today I celebrated mass at the Epiphany with Father Porfiry, Father Matthew, Father Tsvetkov and Father Theodore. At the beginning of mass and before mass, I was restless - and begged the Lord for calm; I calmly reprimanded the royal persons who fell to my share. But before communion, while singing the prayer Our Father, the devil probably persuaded me to take care of the healing of Father Matthew from the love of money, although I myself am just as money-loving and greedy, and while singing the prayer Our Father began to pray to the Heavenly Father to heal him from covetousness and to grant him a sense of compassion and mercy towards the poor and his grace. Where, I thought, is he saving up tens of thousands (damned me) - and I envied his wealth, and did not love him, grew cold towards him because of his covetousness, and condemned him. So what happened? My prayer brought me not peace, but confusion, not boldness, but humiliation, not space, but cramped space. And I received communion without boldness, and went out to the funeral service in embarrassment, excitement, humiliation, crampedness, and the exclamation that came to me in order, I could not utter due to embarrassment, crampedness and fear. Trouble, and that's all. It would be a thousand times better if I only knew my sinfulness and only grieved and prayed for myself, and did not try to correct my elders, and, moreover, the archpriests who would bear their burden [Gal. 6, 5]. I turned out to be a Pharisee, and my brother was a tax collector. Let's go science! I am a scoundrel - I quarreled with my wife over an empty thing. My almsgiving is devoid of mercy, goodness of heart, sincere disposition and love for the recipient, sometimes goodwill, the spirit of Christ, faith in Christ, in the person of the beggar receiving alms. He who comes to Me I will not cast out, says the Lord [Jn. 6, 37], and I, the accursed one, drive the beggars out of the yard when they, having received alms, still ask for more and run after me. I thank You, Lord, for through my strong prayer You made me, going to my brother, father priest Alexander Lebedev, glad with Your salvation, Your consolation, Your peace, Your strength, Your light, Your freedom. Forgive me, Lord, that I was indignant with my brethren - Archpriests Paul and Matthew. Maybe I would have done the same myself in their place. Because of my sins, I am worthy to endure their envy, persecution, and enmity against me (my attempt to arrange a sister-in-law for a future teacher of the law was included in the form!). I thank You, Lord, for hearing my lewdness, when I, going to the gymnasium and being bound by the captivity of my many sins, begged with a strong inner cry for Your goodness to forgive my sins, to grant me freedom and peace; I thank You for Your great powers that have been accomplished in me, for the mercy and bounty poured out on me; I thank You, for through me You have given peace to all my disciples, and You have subdued them, and always subdue them under me, and make them meek lambs, and inspire them to honor me and receive Your blessing through me. I thank You for Your strength, which is ever accomplished in my (crying) great weakness. January 17th, 1869 When you become angry at your fellow man for his various sins, which the eye keen on the sins of others will enumerate, then immediately turn your eye on yourself, on your inner ugliness, impartially sort through all your sins in your heart and sincerely condemn yourself, asking for mercy from God - then you will be reconciled with God, peace will be established in your heart and the tightness that tears apart your soul and the darkness that surrounds it will disappear. This happened to me at mass on Monday, January 20th. Father Matthew served. We are bad doctors: we ourselves are sick and we don’t treat ourselves, but we just want to treat others, we just want to sit on other people’s wounds, like flies. In our brother’s pity for food and sweet drinks and in our anger towards him, our addiction to sweets, to the flesh and in general to earthly goods in general is revealed, and at the same time our pride, and malice, and our envy, lack of faith, lack of trust in God. Man, look at yourself, what you are, how vile and ungodly you are, and do not judge others, but humble yourself and correct yourself first. You are violating the entire evangelical and prophetic law because of food; You swear at the goodness and bounty of the Creator, creating an ungrateful act. Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you [Matt. 6, 33]. Hold on to love, share your wealth with love - and your hand will not become scarce, and the Lord will invisibly give to you. When a brother and sister eat and drink with us, our goods, our property, strictly speaking, does not decrease, because according to the law of God’s retribution, what is given back to us is strictly 52 what was given in favor of the brother or sister. And in general, we should not at all spare anything for our neighbors, just as the Lord God does not spare anything for us, especially because of perishable matter we should not be hostile to the imperishable image of God - man, and use God’s gifts as a reason for love and gratitude, and not enmity and ingratitude. The enemy disturbs homes with food and drink and anger towards strangers or relatives who consume them, and in the church - again with anger towards his fellow man, confusion, doubts, and dreamy fears. My God! Intercede with Your grace the work of Your hands! We must joyfully give our brother the perishable demand: food, clothing, etc. - and not look at the fury of the flesh, jealous of its own pleasure and satiety, splendor in clothes, in housing, in decoration, ready to turn the earth into paradise, into heaven. We must be grateful to our neighbors, because of whom we fall into temptation and experience our passions: they are our doctors, our friends, our benefactors, although perhaps they did not think so. This is what the inner Christian life is like! It is completely opposite to the life of the world and the flesh. Here we must consider as good what seems to be a great evil, and the greatest evil is what seems to be good, for example, pleasures, sweets, wealth, honors. Sometimes the Lord takes away visible goods in order to give invisible, eternal ones, so that we, clinging to the visible, do not lose the invisible, or in order to give greater ones for impartiality towards them and distribution to the brethren. In general, we must rely on Providence. Just as the air is God’s, and they still breathe it, so food and drink or all the fruits are God’s, and in fact nothing is ours, and therefore, if anyone takes food and drink from me, let him take it, for it is not mine, but God’s, and God gave it to me. I thank the Lord, who drove away the taint of Sodom’s uncleanness from me by invoking His name and looking to Him with the eyes of my heart and body. It was in the fifth grade on January 22nd. I thank the Lord, who made me peaceful during Matins, when I stood in the Peter and Paul chapel and prepared to celebrate early mass. I thank the Lord, who gave me a great victory during the liturgy itself, after communion, when the enemy’s fight was very fierce and evil and insolent, and he tried to deprive me of the fruit of communion. Oh, how subtle is the enemy, how sharp are his arrows! Oh, how he intensifies to chain my heart to earthly things and because of them to turn my heart away from love for God and neighbor and to instill enmity and hatred towards him! How deadly is this hatred, how outrageous, binding, darkening! Oh, how necessary it is for me to crucify self-love, to deny myself (does not seek his own [1 Cor. 13:5]; not only does each one care about himself, but each one also about others [Phil. 2:4]). What impatience the adversary produces in me, hiding behind my pride! Resentment, untruth, malfunction, mistake on the part of my brother - and I become completely indignant, seething with indignation, rage, vengeance and forget Him who said: Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but give place to the wrath of God. For it is written: Vengeance is Mine, I will repay, says the Lord [Rom. 12, 19], and: learn from Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart [Matt. 11, 29]. January 22, 1869. I thank the Lord, who through my prayer made me worthy to perform a marriage without stumbling in the cathedral with a large crowd of people and who through me reconciled the entire church. (Groom Alexander, bride Theodosius.) Before the marriage, I was indignant in spirit that the bride was not coming for a long time, but I begged the Lord to take away the embarrassment and forgive me my impatience and irritability; and after the wedding, and even during the wedding, I looked at the bride and groom with love, like children. Do not charge 53 my old man with the mind of God when reading the prayers of the married. Do not my soul hesitate about anything opposed. Take what is yours and go [Matt. 20, 14]. A terrible, accusatory word from the Judge. What if He leaves me only my sins and takes away all His grace-filled gifts, including natural ones? Isn’t all my goodness God’s? Do I have one sin? January 23. During evening prayer, an unclean spirit attacked me with vile thoughts and strongly incited me to them, stirring up unclean movements in my lower members. He called on the name of the Lord and was saved. (My wife and Marya Konstantinovna were standing.) And the mirror serves our sin - self-love, pride, our vanity, our self-gratification! Networks everywhere! January 24. Today I united with the Lord in the Sacrament of Communion at the early liturgy and was the fullness of Him who fulfills all things in all [Eph. 1, 23]. Oh, if only it were always like this! May all things be fulfilled [Eph. 4, 10], that is, to fill everyone - all hearts. [Matthew 6:10]. This is how wide [the flight] the Lord Himself has assigned to our prayer! We must pray that all people will know God's will and do it. And this will of God is in His Son, for example: that they may all be one [Jn. 17, 21 ]! Egyptian plywood making 54 is an image of our plywood making, our slavery to earthly things. The mental pharaoh constantly torments us with these plinths - addictions to sweets, money, clothes, and so on. But we always strain the eye of our soul. “Tears make you worry, father,” one of the beggars to whom I gave alms told me. How can you not feel sorry for them! And we keep thinking that they don’t want to work! Remember and fulfill the words of the Savior: sell what you have and give to the poor [Matt. 19, 21]. The surge of anger towards my wife that occurred and the generally evil disposition of my heart, which tormented me for a long time and stubbornly, I could only drive out of my soul with tearful prayer. What grace - tears! This is the Divine dew of grace! How peaceful, easy, sweet after them! (I ate meat the day before: meat is harmful to me spiritually.) January 26. Resurrection. I truly understand that the devil is intensifying in many different ways to instill in my heart hatred towards the brethren, such as Archpriest and Father Matthew and others. So, today during Matins he instantly instilled in my heart enmity towards the sexton Nikolai, who with his drunkenness, rudeness and disobedience had long sowed in me a disgust for him. Although, in fairness, one must feel sorry for the dying person and pray for him if he shows an inclination to correct himself after admonition. When Father Archpriest Pavel Vasilyevich stood before the throne, listening to the Sunday Gospel, I could not read the Gospel: weakness, cramped conditions, darkness, and confusion overcame me. And why, by the way? Because the night before I had been gluttonous (a mortal sin): I ate cream, foam, and drank too much half a glass of tea with rum, with a full stomach and seeds that had long been bursting my sides. Truly, gluttony little by little dries up love for God and neighbor, turning it into some kind of soulless idol, looking only downwards and turning away its gaze from what is above. During Matins I read the prayers of light, in which the Holy Spirit embraces all people, the whole world with His creative love - and in my heart there was no warmth, fire, as there was before, there was no spirit in prayer and this breadth of heart, embracing with love everyone, sick for everyone, well-wishing for everyone: Satan at the very beginning of the all-night vigil breathed into my heart with his hellish malice and not allowed me to love. Oh, what captivity, what hellish tightness I felt within myself during the entire Matins! And how well, how peacefully he slept, how easily he got up; I thought that everything would be fine, because I hadn’t tasted much since the evening. However, what am I saying? I expected the usual demonic storm these days, and especially since there was a strong storm in nature - from the south. And somehow, according to my remark, spiritual storms are always connected with these storms, breathing from the abyss of hell. The end of the word: in every possible way kindle in your heart love for God and neighbor, excel in love and in expressing it and by all means enslave the belly, the work of Satan, for through gluttony the devil conveniently plunges into pride, and into anger, and into envy, and into covetousness, and into disobedience, and into confusion, cowardice and spiritual powerlessness, into fornication uncleanness, and laziness, and theft, and deceit. I thank the Lord, who heard the cry of my heart when I fell to His throne in the Pokrovsky chapel, and who saved me from the crowds, ghosts and embarrassments of the enemy, who gave me peace and freedom of spirit and the grace to say the prayer: Christ, the true Light, release and forgiveness with all. The accursed one was so oppressive that even if you didn’t say anything, he disguised the face of the clerk Nicholas so much that even if you didn’t look at him, he was inciting you to drive him out of your sight. He even armed Father Alexander against the deacon, against the watchman Vasily: why are they looking at me, tempted, why are they talking - and all are ghosts, and all are satanic ghosts, all a dream, a lie, a deception, a mirage! God! Teach me to sincerely consider myself worse, lower, more sinful than everyone else! I feel that devilish pride is nesting in me! God! Teach me to look toward You unceasingly, to do Your works unceasingly, and to no longer engage in the deeds of the devil (gluttony, pride, malice, covetousness, carnal beauty, etc.). May the enemy no longer rob me, tearing my mind and heart away from You with various passions! Why do you please, pamper, feast on your flesh, knowing that it is prodigal, evil, proud, envious, lazy, etc.? Why do you bless your heart, knowing its passion? Why don’t you fast and eat rough food? Why don't you refuse sweet drinks? Soft and expensive, colorful clothes? Don’t you know that because of all this and the like, your soul has forgotten about its heavenly purpose, turned away from the Creator, and lost compassion for your neighbors? She abandoned the source of living water and dug for herself leaky wells that could not contain water [Jer. 2, 13], that is, the living, heart-giving grace of God? Your gods became according to the number of your passions. You have become powerless for virtue, but strong for sin: you rage wordlessly, eat and drink greedily, become sated, become enraged by fornication, stare at beautiful faces, covet, and offend. Oh, how the damned one takes the word from the heart, how he intensifies to reign in me, to impose on me the eternal shackles of sins! Protect me, my Savior! Tear apart the bonds of sin and give me Your peace with Your righteousness! Dream on January 27th before morning. Letter depicting the cross and the image of Jesus Christ (two magnificent paintings in flowers); quite long - two leaves; it is written about embarrassment during prayer (which means that embarrassment is a cross - it must be borne). A lot of other things have been written, everything else is joyful. It's like a letter home from the Academy. Where, I tell Shakhmatov, did I find it? And he read. In bed, he says. And he, poor man, has a cross, apparently similar to mine. We must pity him as we do ourselves, pray for him: the enemy breathes malice against us - let us be strengthened by mutual love. The archpriest must be obeyed unquestioningly. Maybe he needs to start earlier in the morning; and if it is not necessary, show obedience without reasoning. The reasoning comes from the enemy. Rejoice that the Lord has granted you, an inviolable servant, the grace to give alms to the poor, in the person of whom He Himself accepts it, and do not complain about others, about the brethren, about parishioners, because they do not give alms and do not want to pay attention to the poor. Apparently, due to their lack of faith and addiction to earthly things and their untruths, they are unworthy to receive this grace from the Lord. But humble yourself before the Lord who works in you, because God works in you to will and to do according to His good pleasure [Phil. 2, 13]. Others should envy you, the beggar for the sake of Christ and the brethren for the sake of the beggar, and not you for them. You should rejoice that the Lord taught you to be so wise: to philosophize above and to despise things below. Rejoice in the simplicity of your self-imposed poverty. However, you are not poor yet. Pray to God that He will grant the gift of non-covetousness and alms to many. Have pity on those who do not act according to the Gospel, for they will be ashamed at their death and at the Last Judgment. Maintain kindness and humility. January 28. Tuesday. I thank the most merciful Lord, who has given me the grace to perform the Divine Liturgy without stumbling and with much strength and a burning spirit and to partake with boldness of the life-giving Mysteries, although with temptation from my flesh, from my senseless and inert heart. After communion, everything in me warmed up: I revived. In the sixth grade, the lesson was told well; behaved splendidly. I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me [Phil. 4, 13]. Kneel your soul and body before the Lady, asking Her to console our newlyweds in Chisinau and transfer them to another place. He also prayed for the softening of the hearts of the rich and for the establishment of a House of Diligence for the poor, for the assistance of the fathers in the matter of alms; about enlightening them, about softening their hearts. The slanderer of our brethren, the devil, constantly tries to slander our brethren, presenting us with various ghosts and pretexts for hatred; haters often had to learn that those they hated were not at all involved in what they were hated for, that the hater was chasing a ghost, and not reality. The most evil, whatever it may be, is the ghost of Satan, the lie of the devil; he sowed these ghosts, these lies in everyone. How can we believe in anything the devil, who is a lie [Jn. 8, 44], whose suggestions are all false, not corresponding to anything real? After all, the devil once deceived the first people forever, telling them: no, you will not die... you will be like gods, knowing good and evil [Gen. 3, 4-5], and destroyed them and us - how can we still listen to the seducer, inspiring us with hatred, envy, pride, fornication, bliss on earth, inciting us to voluptuousness, covetousness and other sins? After all, it seems that the enemy has already been exposed in his tricks, intrigues, cunning, and yet we still obey him - why? Because it flatters, deceives, false colors, puts some kind of charm on visible objects, and tries to completely cover up the invisible ones - hence comes unbelief, denial of the spiritual world. They do not believe that there is eternal life, eternal torment, due to the action of the deceiving enemy, they do not believe the word of the Truth Himself incarnate - the Lord Jesus Christ. Pathetic! Remember the bitter lesson given to Adam and Eve by trusting the serpent and disbelief in the words of the Lord: you will surely die [Gen. 2, 17]. Who told the truth: God or the serpent? God said: you will die, but the serpent: no, you will not die... but you will be like gods. Aren't we all dying by now? Look, even now this ancient serpent whispers to you: there will be no eternal life, there will be no eternal torment; and God says: it will be both. Believe the Lord - and do not believe the serpent. Prepare for death, for resurrection, for Judgment, for an answer, so that you will not be cast into eternal fire. So, each one carefully watch his heart and do not be embarrassed by the enemy’s incitement to sin and endure all the hardships, all the fire with which he stings you, saying: I will endure this fire from you, and you, for me and for yourself, will be cast into eternal fire, which will torment you, the tormentor of men. I sinned against the Lord today through contemplation, false shame, embarrassment and fear when pronouncing the absolution during mass (Sinebryukhova, the imaginary Katerina Pavlovna Trachevskaya): this embarrassment and doubt greatly hurt me. Then he sinned by being angry with Archpriests Paul and Matthew during the funeral service. Again I forgot that my flesh is prodigal, and again I feast on it, I cherish it. I have sinned against the Lord. And illness crucifies the flesh, carnal and spiritual passions (pain in the legs). January 30, 1869. I thank You, Lord, for the fiery, tearful prayer, with which you cleansed, pacified, sanctified (Matins); I thank you for the strength and great mercy bestowed upon me during the celebration of the early liturgy in the Assumption Church. 31 [January]. I thank the Lord, who wonderfully strengthened me to perform the Divine Liturgy and to partake without judgment of the Divine Mysteries, the thorns of passions that gored me, burned me and completely pacified me, confused; I thank the Lord, who raised me up when I stumbled when I cried out to Him with a strong cry of my soul. (Stepson's prosphora.) I thank the Lord, who saved me in the evening, who delivered me from the bitter consequences of irritation. I thank the Lord, for through my prayer I strengthened me, the weakest, to perform the Divine Liturgy in the Assumption Church and the royal house without stumbling and speak the word with boldness and strength. (Temptation defeated by the power of God: sexton Shakhmatov went up to the altar to read the memorial; suspicion - he would not have stolen money from the table; embarrassment, powerlessness, captivity; intense prayer for deliverance from the evil one.) It was very difficult to serve because of the delicacy the day before, as one thinks. I thank the Lord, who has given me the grace to carry out my marriage without stumbling in the cathedral. I thank the Lord, who despises and conquers the charm of sweets and fading beauty, teaching me through prayer and looking at the original, most holy beauty and sweetness and thought, as all human beauty is some reflection of Divine beauty, for man is the image of God, and as the original, imprecise sweetness is the Lord God, present-day sweetness is only a shadow. Arise, Peter, kill and eat [Acts. 10, 13]. Stab, that is, kill the old man. A person who has killed the old man within himself is an acceptable sacrifice to the Lord. The nobles and the rich have constant feasts, but the poor Russian people suffer from disadvantages, from hunger, from extortions: the last horse and cow are sold - give them a tax; and what will she do?.. Oh, rich people! Oh Lazari! But what will happen to both of them after death?.. How much oppression poor people suffer is impossible to imagine! At least don't live in the world! Cards are harmful because the card player is looking down, and not on the mountain, not on the mountain; the mind enslaves to cards, and not to thinking about God and the salvation of the soul, and kills time in vanity. Why was man created with a straight waist? What is a Christian? Antiphon 2 at Matins, tone 6. We are talking about government reforms of the 60s and 70s of the 19th century, carried out by Alexander II, which affected the life of the Church and brought radical changes to the position of the clergy. The most important result of the church reform was the abolition of the class isolation of the clergy. By decrees of February 22, 1867 and May 26, 1869, the hereditary transfer of church places was destroyed, and then the affiliation of the children of the clergy to the clergy class: the children of the clergy were expelled from the Spiritual Department with the rights of children of personal nobles or hereditary and personal honorary citizens, while retaining the rights to social assistance under the Spiritual Department. Those who were in active church service remained in the clergy. Legally, these decrees abolished the clergy class. Theological educational institutions became available to everyone; Secular educational institutions also opened their doors to the children of clergy, and a strong outflow of clergy children to secular educational institutions began (in the late 70s, a third of university students came from the clergy). How many (Church Glorious) - how many, how many. Alma Mater (lat.) – lit.: nursing mother; This is how in the old days students called the university that gave them knowledge; allegorical name for a spiritual source. Extensive (Church Slavic) – twice as large, double. Do not charge (church glory) - do not rebel, do not resist. Plinth making - making bricks (plinth (Greek) - brick). The Egyptians forced the people of Israel, who were enslaved by them, to make bricks (Exodus 1:13–14). You might be interested in: