Слово 9

Defensive words spoken by him to his father Gregory in the presence of Basil the Great after the ordination of St. Gregory the Theologian as Bishop of Sassim Again the anointing and the Spirit are on me, and again I go “weeping and mourning” (Ps. 34:14). You may be amazed at this, but Isaiah, until he sees the glory of the Lord and the high and exalted throne and the seraphim around him, does not say anything like that, does not show either grief or fear; and although he accuses Israel, he spares himself and separates himself as innocent of anything. When he saw this and heard the holy and mysterious voice, as if beginning to understand himself better, he said: “Woe is me, for I am a man of unclean lips” (Is. 6:5), and adds the words that follow, which I will not say, so as not to say something offensive. I also find about Manoah, the ancient Judge, and then about Peter, the pillar of the Church, that one, when he learned how much the vision he had exceeded his nature and strength, said to his wife: we perished because we saw God; the other cannot stand the Savior’s presence and the miracles that the Lord showed to those who sailed with Him while fishing, and therefore, although he is surprised, he nevertheless sends him away from the ship, adding the reason that he himself is unworthy of God’s appearance and conversation. And when I hear in the Gospel about the centurion who asks Christ to show strength, but refuses to see Him in his home, because his blood cannot contain God’s dignity and greatness; Then I cannot blame myself for fear and lamentation. For just as the sun exposes the weakness of the eye, so God, by His coming, exposes the weakness of the soul; and For some He is light, and for others He is fire, depending on what substance and what quality He encounters in each. How should we think about Saul? And he was anointed, received the Spirit, he himself became spiritual (I can’t say anything else about him), he even prophesied, and so unexpectedly and unusually that this miracle turned into a proverb and is repeated to this day: “Is Saul also among the prophets” (1 Samuel 10:11). Since he did not completely surrender himself to the Spirit and did not completely turn “into another man,” as was predicted (1 Samuel 10:6), but some spark of the former evil remained in him, and some bad seed, the struggle of flesh and spirit still continued... but why expose all his shortcomings to shame? You know this spirit of resistance, and the singer who drives it away. Can we also learn from this that, just as grace does not concern unworthy people and a bad and untuned organ (after all, it is beautifully said, of which I am sure, “just as wisdom does not enter into an evil soul” (Wisdom 1:4), so (I will add this on my own), due to the inconstancy and changeability of the structure and nature of man, it is no less difficult for him to preserve dignity and harmony in himself, as well as to improve himself in the beginning and become worthy). But often grace itself (I name the evil that is most wretched and incomprehensible in us), boiling and puffing up, removed from God those who approached Him wrongly; and we are already cast down in the very exaltation, “sin turns out to be sin, because through good it causes me death” (Rom. 7:13). Fearing this, I was filled with sorrow, lowered my gaze and experienced something similar to what happens when lightning flashes with children, in whom this sight produces pleasure mixed with horror. I have loved and feared the Spirit together; It took some time for me, having gathered with myself, to sober up and choose the best and safest, and so that when there is no sorrow, like chaff in the seed, and bad thoughts give way to better ones, the Spirit will completely conquer and use me for His service and work, for perfecting these people, for governing souls, for teaching by word, deed and example, “with the weapon of righteousness in the right and left hand” (2 Cor. 6:7), to the graceful passage of shepherding, which distracts from the world, comes to God, exhausts the body, unites with the Spirit, avoids darkness, rejoices in the light, drives away animals, gathers the flock into the fence, beware of rapids and deserts and drives to mountains and heights, about which, in my opinion, the wonderful Micah speaks, raising us from the earth to a height decent for us: “come closer to the eternal mountains - get up and leave, for this country is not a place of rest” (Mic. 2:10), although some think of finding peace for themselves in earthly and earthly things. Teach me such shepherding, friends, and now my Shepherds and fellow shepherds; Give me the rules for such shepherding, and you, the common father, who over time has appointed and outlived many Shepherds, and you, the tester and judge of my wisdom! But caught and stunned by the storm, can we skillfully shepherd and feed the flock? Listen to me with equanimity, you, who, being one of the sheep, when you and I (do not be offended by my words) still belonged to the dumb flock, acted much more humanely than what you do when you become a shepherd, when we are awarded spiritual pasture. I became in your power, as you wanted, and you defeated the invincible. Here is for you, among other things, the word that you, knowing, sought and which, in praise, showered me, numb in silence, with frequent and thick snows of your words. But there is something for which I can reproach you in friendship. Which of our mutual friends will judge me, who will be an incorruptible judge and pronounce a truthful verdict, will not, as many do, respect the persons in court? Will you order me to tell you what I reproach you for, and won’t you turn your words against me again? And you, wonderful husband, something inexplicable, truly inexplicable and incredible, happened to me, which has never been heard of among us until now. I yielded not to persuasion, but to compulsion. And isn't it wonderful! how everything has changed, what a distance there is between us! How? (As you please, I will say so) - by the throne or by the greatness of grace? However, lead, “make haste and reign” (Ps. 44:5), and shepherd me, the shepherd, because I am ready to follow you and be led by your pastoral, high and divine soul. (For it is necessary to tell the truth, although out of love I dared to do what is yours and beyond the law.) Teach me your love for your flock, your thoughtfulness and at the same time prudence, attentiveness, vigilance, obedience to your flesh, with which it yielded to the spirit, this complexion, testifying to pastoral labors, with meekness - strict treatment, when doing business - cheerfulness and calmness (which you will not find in many, and what there were few examples), your advocacy for your flock and the victories that you won in Christ. Tell me which pastures to lead the flock to, which springs to go to or which pastures and water to avoid, who to graze with a club and who to graze with a pipe; when to take out to pasture and when to call from pasture; how to fight with wolves and how not to fight with shepherds, especially in the present time, when (I will express sorrow in the words of the most holy prophets) “the shepherds have become senseless” (Jer. 10:21), “and they scatter the sheep of the pasture” (Jer. 23:1); how to raise the weak, raise the fallen, convert the erring, recover the lost and preserve the strong; How can I learn this and observe this in accordance with the true and your teaching about the duty of the Shepherd, and not become a bad shepherd who “eats milk, clothes himself with the wave, buries the fat or sells”, and leaves the rest to the beasts and rapids, and shepherds himself, and not the sheep, for which the ancient leaders of Israel were reproached (Ezek. 34: 3-4). Teach me this, strengthen me with these rules, according to these commandments, be shepherds and co-shepherds and save me and my sacred flock both by teaching and prayers, so that I may stand, and you may boast on the day of the appearance and revelation of our great God and Chief Shepherd, Jesus Christ, through whom and with whom glory be to the Father Almighty with the Holy and Life-giving Spirit, now and unto the ages of ages. Amen. You might be interested in: