Монахиня Серафима (Осоргина)

Venerable Seraphim in the life of Mother Tamar Now I would like to transport my thoughts back to Perkhushkovo, to those distant sunny, frosty days that I spent there, when all of nature, the entire forest around the house froze in a dazzling snowy glow, and at night the stars, which seemed huge, moved in the dark sky, and from the severe frost sometimes there were sounds like strong blows on the walls: this was caused by cracks in the logs of the wooden walls from the moisture freezing in them. My thoughts are transported to Mother Tamar’s cell, when I sat with her in the morning and listened to her stories. From these stories I learned why the monastery was called Seraphim-Znamensky, I learned what role the Monk Seraphim played in the life of mother. I will try to convey my mother’s stories as accurately as possible. After a conversation with the abbess of the Bodbe Monastery; when my mother, then Princess Tamara Mardzhanova, expressed her desire to become a nun, Abbess Juvenalia gave her two books: Abba Dorotheus and a short biography of St. Seraphim, who was not yet glorified at that time. This was mother’s first “meeting” with the Sarov ascetic; for the first time he captured her attention and entered her heart. In 1903, when they were preparing for the solemn opening of the relics of St. Seraphim in Sarov, Mother, then already the abbess of the Bodbe Monastery, sending one of her nuns to collect for the monastery in different cities of Russia, instructed her to be in Sarov on the day of the opening of the relics and bring her the icon consecrated on the shrine. The sent nun was in Sarov and was present at the celebration of the glorification of St. Seraphim, but when she, modest and humble, one of the last among the huge crowd of pilgrims came up to venerate the shrine with the relics, all the icons had already been dismantled, and she received nothing. Almost everyone had already left, but she still stood in front of the saint’s shrine and cried because she had not fulfilled the instructions of her abbess. A monk came out of the altar, saw the nun crying and asked her what she was crying about. Understanding her grief, he took a small icon of St. Seraphim from the altar, consecrated it on a shrine and handed it over to mother. The sister happily returned to the Bodbe Monastery and brought the icon to her mother. It was a simple wooden icon with a half-length image of St. Seraphim, approximately 12x15 centimeters in size. Mother kept it in her cell. After some time, a close relative of hers came to visit my mother with a boy of six or seven years old. Her husband was a famous surgeon. Soon after arriving at the monastery, the boy suffered an acute attack of appendicitis. According to the monastery doctor, it was necessary to immediately perform an operation; The pain was severe, the temperature was high, and redness appeared on the abdomen. They sent a telegram to their father, urgently calling him to Bodby. Mother had previously invited him to come with his wife and son, but he was very busy and could not free himself. Having sent a telegram, mother said to her relative: “Well, we have done everything we could in human terms, now let’s pray according to our monastery custom.” A priest was called. Mother brought the icon of St. Seraphim and placed it on the boy’s chest. He was delirious and tossing about. They served a prayer service. One could imagine how the child’s mother and mother prayed—his life was in danger. During the prayer service, the boy became quiet and fell asleep peacefully. In the evening, the father arrived and immediately went into the patient’s room. Mother and mother remained in the next room. After some time, the father-surgeon came out with an upset and dissatisfied face: - Why did you call me by telegram? What, are you kidding? You know how busy I am! His wife rushed to him, not understanding his words, his displeased tone. “The boy is completely healthy,” the surgeon announced. It was true: the temperature dropped, the redness on the abdomen disappeared, there was no sensitivity in the appendix area, the child was completely healthy. This was the first miracle performed by the icon of St. Seraphim. Shortly after this, a second miracle of healing occurred. The nun, the mother regent, fell ill; She was diagnosed with throat cancer. She could hardly swallow anymore, she couldn’t speak. They served a prayer service in front of the icon of St. Seraphim, and from that moment the nun felt that she was better. After the prayer service, she swallowed a piece of prosphora with holy water. She began to recover and completely recovered from her terrible and seemingly hopeless illness. The mother regent asked mother to leave the icon of St. Seraphim with her. “The icon remained with her,” mother said, “somehow I still didn’t fully realize that it was really a miraculous icon.” I vividly remember how my mother told me all this, I remember her voice, I remember how excited she was while talking about the third, most amazing miracle. There was a novice Ulyasha in the monastery. Her obedience was to carry firewood to the monastery kitchen, which was stacked in a large barn several fathoms high. Once, when Ulyasha was taking firewood, it fell on her, and suddenly the entire wall of wood collapsed, burying unfortunate Ulyasha in a mountain. When they finally pulled her out, she was unconscious. A doctor was called and examined her. She was completely crippled, her arms, legs, ribs were broken, her chest was compressed, her internal organs were displaced - but she was still alive, her heart was beating. The doctor told mother that Ulyasha was in such a state that nothing could be done to help her. In general, from the doctor’s words, mother understood that the situation was hopeless. Ulyasha was in the monastery hospital, where the doctor visited every day. She never regained consciousness, but continued to breathe. Two or three days passed, and she was still alive, but she had changed terribly: her face somehow twisted and turned blue. The doctor came to see my mother after visiting the sick and said that, in his opinion, Ulyasha would die that night: there was almost no pulse, and the doctor was amazed at the vitality of this unfortunate, crushed, mangled creature. In the evening, after evening prayers, mother called her young novice Fima and told her: – The doctor thinks that Ulyasha will die tonight. I don’t want to wake up the sisters at night for the funeral service; we’ll serve it in the morning. And you go now to the mother regent, ask her to give the icon of St. Seraphim, take it to Ulyasha, put it on her chest and bow down, so that the Lord will take her soul without suffering. Fima left, mother prayed alone in her cell. “Suddenly,” my mother says, “I hear the stomping of feet, someone is running and straight into my cell.” This is Fima, she is out of breath and rushes to me: - Mother, mother, Ulyasha... - What, Ulyasha died? I told you that we won’t wake up the sisters! - No, mother, Ulyasha... got up! Mother, as soon as she heard these words, was in the yard and almost ran to the hospital building. It was clear that the incredible news had already spread throughout the monastery; Lights came on in the windows everywhere, the sisters ran out and hurried to the hospital. And when mother ran up the steps of the hospital porch and headed to the sick woman’s room, she was met at the door by Ulyasha herself, standing firmly on her feet and holding the icon of St. Seraphim in her hands. Seeing mother, Ulyasha put the icon on the windowsill and said: “Mother, akathist!” (these were the first words she uttered) - and bowed to the ground in front of the icon. During the reading of the akathist, many sisters gathered, many cried. It is impossible to convey the joy and tenderness of everyone at the sight of the healed Ulyasha. The mood was like Easter. Ulyasha then told her mother everything that happened to her. The last thing she remembers is how she went into the barn and the terrible roar of firewood falling on her. Then I immediately saw myself in a large pine forest. It must be said that Ulyasha, who was born and raised in the Caucasus, had never seen the pine forest that she dreamed of. She said that she was walking through this forest and saw in front of her the bent figure of an old man in a white duckweed with a stick, who was walking away from her. She was in a hurry, she so wanted to catch up with him, she ran after him and... stood up, holding in her hands an icon with the image of this same old man, St. Seraphim. And when mother began to question Fima, she said that she, on mother’s instructions, went to her mother regent, took the icon from her and took it to the hospital. Fima was afraid to go alone to Ulyasha - “she was lying there so scary, her face was all blue” - and called another novice with her. They entered, placed the icon on the dying woman’s chest, and suddenly it seemed to them that Ulyasha shuddered. Out of fright, the young sisters jumped out of the room and began to look through the crack at Ulyasha. They saw how, at first quietly, and then more and more forcefully, Ulyasha began to breathe, and then gradually began to move her arms and legs, then suddenly she firmly grabbed the icon lying on her chest with her hands, sat up on the bed, lowered her legs and stood up... Then Fima rushed headlong to her mother. The next day the doctor arrived at the usual hour. Mother ordered him to be taken straight to her and not to say anything to him. When he entered, mother said that she wanted to go with him to the hospital to see Ulyasha. - How, has she really not died yet? - asked the doctor and added that he had never seen life last so long in a completely crippled body. Mother didn't tell him anything. They entered the hospital together and headed to Ulyasha’s room. Ulyasha herself opened the door for them and bowed low to the doctor. Mother said that she would never forget his face: he turned pale and involuntarily backed away. When she told him everything in order, the doctor wanted to leave and only said somehow embarrassed: - Well, I have nothing more to do here! But Ulyasha herself stopped him: – Doctor, the Lord healed me through the prayers of St. Seraphim, but you tried to help me when I was unconscious. I am very grateful to you. And now I kindly ask you to examine me again. Mother also insisted on this, and the doctor carefully examined Ulyasha. He found that she was completely healthy, there was not a single fracture, her heart, lungs, all internal organs were working normally. Mother told me that this doctor had previously been an unbeliever and that after the miracle that happened to Ulyasha, he came to faith. Since then, mother has never parted with the icon of St. Seraphim. Once, in the last year of her abbess at the Bodbe monastery, mother went to Tiflis on monastery business with one of the sisters and a novice. Suddenly, on a deserted road in the mountains, an armed crowd of mountaineers attacked the carriage and started shooting. One horse was killed and the coachman was wounded. Mother held the icon of St. Seraphim on her chest with both hands. Fortunately, at this time a detachment of Cossacks arrived, which was supposed to escort the carriage. They appeared just at the moment when a carriage with one dead horse and a seriously wounded coachman stood on the road under fire. The Cossacks soon managed to drive out the highlanders. When the shooting stopped, the officer jumped off his horse, walked up and opened the door of the carriage, which was literally riddled with bullets. Mother sat holding an icon of St. Seraphim. Not only she and none of the sisters were wounded, but even their clothes were not shot through anywhere - and on the floor of the carriage the Cossack officer collected a whole handful of bullets. So the Monk Seraphim protected mother and saved her. Let me remind you that, as the abbess of the Intercession community in Moscow, mother became very close to Grand Duchess Elizaveta Feodorovna. When the little heir Alexei Nikolaevich developed a terrible disease, hemophilia, Grand Duchess Elizaveta Feodorovna began to ask her mother to send him the miraculous icon of St. Seraphim. No matter how difficult it was for mother to part with this icon, in this case she, of course, could not refuse and gave the icon to the Grand Duchess for transfer to Empress Alexandra Feodorovna. And mother never saw this icon again! She knew that the icon stood at the head of the Heir, but what happened to it when the Royal Family was arrested in 1917, no one knew and would never know... It was a very simple wooden icon, similar to many similar icons, but mother said: “I would recognize it from a thousand icons!” After the first miracles performed by the icon in the Caucasus, mother inserted it into a narrow silver frame. The idea of ​​creating a new monastery came to mother when she traveled to Sarov and when she prayed before the icon of the Mother of God of the Sign. Indeed, the Mother of God herself inspired this idea in her, as if entrusting her with the creation of a monastery. And that’s why Mother Tamar so wanted to create a monastery dedicated to the Mother of God and St. Seraphim. The Monk Seraphim also performed many, many miracles in the life of his mother. Here I told only about the most outstanding ones that I remember from my mother’s stories. And in Perkhushkovo, after the destruction of the Seraphim-Znamensky monastery, when mother lived with ten sisters under the constant threat of arrest, the Monk Seraphim did not leave her with his care. Nothing financially ensured the life of my mother and her sisters, but they not only lived without hunger, but helped many who came to them. Of course, they also had more difficult times. One winter my mother became very ill. She had pleurisy, almost died and became terribly weak. Mother was a great faster; she usually ate so little that one could only wonder why she was alive. For example, her lunch usually consisted of two baked potatoes or one baked apple. And then, weakened by illness, she suddenly wanted to refresh herself, and she said that she would eat fish. Where could I get fresh fish in the winter in the village, at a time when potatoes were hard to come by! It was impossible to go to Moscow for fish - there was no money for it; The sisters were terribly sad that “mother wanted fish,” but there was nowhere to get it. In the afternoon, two sisters went to the river with buckets to fetch water. They walked along a narrow path trodden in the snow and prayed to St. Seraphim: “Father, St. Seraphim, send fish to our mother.” They came to the river and saw two pikes playing in the ice hole. This is a completely extraordinary phenomenon in winter! The sisters threw the buckets and rushed to run home, since there was nothing to catch the pikes with. They ran to the priest, Father Filaret. He grabbed the net and hurried with them to the river. And the pikes seem to be waiting and everyone is playing in the ice hole. Father Filaret caught one pike with a net, and how happy the sisters were that they were able to fulfill their mother’s wish! This incident, and the whole life of mother and sisters, reminds me of a story from the Diveyevo Chronicle, where one can see how the Mother of God and the Monk Seraphim took care of the simplest, daily needs of the sisters. And in Perkhushkov one could feel constant real communication with the heavenly world. That’s why the mood was general, the whole atmosphere was always bright and joyful, despite the extremely difficult and difficult times. August 25/September 7, 1970