Бесстрастие
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You write that you don’t want anything, but only to be always alone, to see your sins, never to be distracted by your thoughts, to cut off your will in everything, etc.
...In other words, you suddenly want to become dispassionate. And don’t worry too much about the future, no matter how much temptation comes your way. Live well in the present (2, part 3, p. 78).
It’s not possible to become dispassionate now; and every time, feeling your sinfulness, say: “Lord, forgive me!” The Lord alone is able to put love into a person’s heart (3, p. 231).
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