Собеседование 2-е

Psalm of David about the eighth day Scripture calls the eighth the day following the week of present life, and the new life that was foreshadowed by the eight-day circumcision. About the eighth, the wise Solomon inspires, in the words: “give a part of seven and even eight” (Eccl. 11:2), as if saying: in this age of the thousand-year week, think about the good part, the eighth, about eternal life, coming and abiding. Let's look at the beginning of the psalm itself. "God! Do not rebuke me in Your wrath, and do not punish me in Your anger” (Ps. 6:2). I know, Lord, that a terrible and terrible judgment awaits me in the face of the angels and all creation, (when) the Judge will sit on a terrible and exalted throne and will reveal and reveal all the sins I have committed, I know, and I do not dare to bring You, Lord, my confession on behalf of my many sins. My sin is greater than what can be left to me, I have sinned before You more gravely than any man, I have offended Your name beyond measure, I have lived more dissolutely than the prodigal (son), I owe You more than the one who owed a thousand talents. An evil enemy robbed me worse than a tax collector; a murderer and a robber killed me worse than a robber. I have surpassed the harlot in fornication, I have sunk deeper than the Ninevites in sin without repentance, I have sinned more evilly than the Canaanite woman. “My iniquities have gone beyond my head...like a heavy burden and weighed down on me. I suffered and bent to the end” (Ps. 37:5, 7). I have insulted Your holy name, I have disobeyed Your commandments, I have squandered Your wealth in evil ways, I have squandered Your treasure badly. The pledge given by You, I lived with Your enemies; I have not kept the voice of Your commandments; You have defiled the garment with which You clothed me; I extinguished the lamp You prepared for me through my negligence; my face, which You enlightened, I have darkened with my sins; My eyes, to which You gave light, I have become blind again; my lips, which You sanctified, I have again profaned. And I know that You will still expose what I have done; I won’t hide from this anywhere, but in any case I will be exposed. But, “Lord! Do not rebuke me in Your wrath." (I do not say: do not rebuke me). This is impossible, but: “Do not rebuke me in Your wrath.” Only You, the only Lover of Humanity, can grant me this (indulgence). You Yourself know exactly all my secret failures, but “do not rebuke me in Your wrath.” Do not announce them, do not reveal them before all angels and people to my shame. "God! Do not rebuke me in Your wrath." If no one can bear the wrath of a mortal king, then what kind of creature can withstand the wrath of God? “And do not punish me in Your anger.” I'm not asking: don't punish. I will bear admonition and punishment, but in admonishing, let me not “punish me not in Thy anger.” I know that the thief asked and received forgiveness from You. I know that the harlot fell to You with all her soul and received forgiveness. I know that the publican wept before You from the depths of his heart, and was justified. But I'm not like them. I do not have enough tears, I do not have true confession, I do not have groans from the depths of my heart, I do not have a pure soul, I do not have an unhypocritical fast, I do not have love for my brother, I do not have spiritual poverty, I do not have compassion to be worthy of compassion, I do not have chastity in the flesh, I do not have purity of thoughts, I do not have a will decent to God. Finally, with what face or by what right will I ask for forgiveness? Lord, more than once I promised You to repent, and I broke my promises. More than once I fell before You in church, and immediately, leaving there, I wallowed in sin. Many times you have shown mercy to me and I have been rejected. How long have you been patient and I have not turned? How many times have You raised me up and I fell again? How many times have You encouraged me and I have remained ungrateful to You? How many times have I been heard by You, but have not listened to You? How many times have You shown compassion to me, but I have not served You in any way? How much honor have You shown me, and I did not want to honor You? How many times have You called me as a Father to a sinner, lovingly accepting me as a son, and calling me like a child, opening your arms? To the fallen One You said to me: “Arise, you who sleep” (Eph. 5:14). Come to Me, I will not persecute you, I will not punish you, I will not shame you, I will not curse my creation, I will not reject you, I will not harden My heart towards My child. I do not want to hate My image, which turned to Me, I do not want to reject the man whom I formed with My own hand, whom I created, whom I bore, for whom I humbled myself, for whom I shed my blood. How can I not accept him turning to Me and falling down? So, having an inexhaustible and boundless abyss of love for mankind and a sea of long-suffering, “do not reprove me in Your wrath, O Lord, and do not punish me in Your anger,” but be patient with me even more, do not rush to pluck me from this life immature, do not rush to cut me like a barren fig tree, but, as a kind and humane owner, give me Together with everyone else, this summer is a time of repentance, do not neglect to endure my negligence and do not take me away from here unprepared. Do not take me without a wedding garment; do not expose your naked soul to shame at Your throne. Finally, do not take me, who has nothing to bring to You, but be long-suffering with me, but be philanthropic, but show compassion to me, the poor, careless, careless, pitiful, needy, prodigal, defiled, dissolute, ungrateful, heartless, insensitive, sad, mired, darkened and unrequited, unworthy of any love for mankind, unworthy heaven, worthy of all reproach, hell and punishment. But, “Lord! Do not rebuke me in Your wrath, and do not punish me in Your anger. Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak” (Ps. 6:2–3). My conscience is weak, my mind is weak. My days have passed in turmoil, and the end of the tide is already approaching. But open to me, O Lord, the unworthy one who knocks, and do not close the door of Your mercy, but open the door to me and stretch out your hand to him who is wallowing in the abyss of lusts, and do not shut it before me. If you don't make it in time, who will? And if You don’t hurry, who will help us? Absolutely no one. But You, who are humane by nature, give us time to live, give us time to convert. Defeat my petrification and achieve my correction. Give me a little more time and show me the way to salvation. After all, if You don’t help, no matter how hard I try, everything will be useless and meaningless. Lord, do not leave completely, but warn your creation. You said: “Without Me you can do nothing” (John 15:5). Hasten the conversion of my soul and the course of my life. I am a slave to nature, but even more enslaved to my bad habit. “Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak.” My enemy exhausted me, my enemies trampled me, brought me to weakness and exhaustion. But the weak and exhausted cannot heal himself, the weak cannot lift himself, cannot help himself, cannot strengthen himself. Finally: “Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am weak; Heal me, O Lord, for my bones are shaken" (Ps. 6:3). All the bones of my soul are crushed and broken. And with broken bones a person cannot seek a doctor, cannot run and defend himself from enemies. But You yourself, O Lord, find me, You who have come to seek what was lost. Take and save the one who has fallen a second time among the robbers. They did not leave me half dead, but completely dead. But “heal me, O Lord, and I will be healed” (Jer. 17:14). Heal me, O Lord, because the insidious serpent has made me powerless and rotten. Weak and rotten all over, I lie on the ground, all ulcerated, a powerless corpse, (who) only with his voice calls the doctor, only cries out and seeks the one who will save, barely opens his eyes and looks around, when the One who strengthens the paralyzed, saves the despairing and encourages the contrite will come, when He will provide help. “Heal me, O Lord, for my bones are shaken. And my soul is greatly indignant" (Ps. 6:3-4). Body and soul, he says, Lord, confusion has seized me, carnal passions have taken possession of me, body and soul have become a playground for demons. "Heal me, Lord, for my bones are shaken," binding and holding together my inner man. What kind of bones are these? Faith, understanding, hope, love, chastity, piety, meekness, humility. These are the broken bones I have. “Heal me, O Lord, for my bones are shaken. And my soul is greatly indignant." I see - the beauty of my soul is already fading, the end is approaching, old age is entering into strength, my summer is leaning towards the end, it is passing; my reaper is in a hurry, shows a sickle, carries an ax, threatens me with a beating; Now my infertility is revealed, and I am thrown into the fire. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I already see the thief: he is approaching and is in a hurry to kidnap me, to cut short the days of my life. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I see a long and difficult road from this life to that life, and I have no reserves for it. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I see the lender approaching and seizing me as prey. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I see the speaker (λογοθέτης) shaking the handwriting of my sins, and the prisoners are gnashing their teeth. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I see (around me) many accusers and not a single defender. "And my soul is greatly indignant." I am afraid and languid, trembling and trembling, and I don’t know what to do. Ask for (extend) life? But I’m afraid I’ll commit new sins in addition to the previous ones. Then with what eyes will I look at the Judge? I am lost in helplessness because I see myself in the last extreme. But the evil one does not cease to pursue me, the confusion inherent in the flesh does not cease to confuse me, the enemies do not stop their war against me, my evil thoughts do not calm down. “And You..., Lord, until (show me help)?” ( Ps. 6:4 )? Why doesn't He give a sign? Why won't he tell me? In extreme despondency and cramped conditions, the prophet wanted to say something terrible and daring to God, and so, turning to Him, he said: “And You..., Lord, how long”? After all, You see, Lord, in what a pitiful and helpless position I am? Do you see the attacks on me, the strength of the enemy, the bodily flame, the war of thoughts, the shortness of time and my exhaustion? How long, finally, do You not show compassion? How long will you not protect? How long have you not been paying attention? How long will you not endure? How long will you not deliver? How long will you not punish? How long will you not have mercy? After all, although I am worthy of complete rejection, by your mercy I hope to receive forgiveness. Such and similar thoughts filled him with despondency, but he restrained himself and, in order not to seem like a belligerent, he moved on from them to prayer and said: “Turn, O Lord: deliver my soul, save me according to Thy mercy” (Ps. 6:5). Not for the sake of my works, because they are evil, not for the sake of my labors, because I am weak, but “by Thy mercy.” Oh, Master, if You want to sue me, I myself will pronounce judgment on myself and confess that I am worthy of death, but You - “save me by Your mercy.” I rely entirely on Your mercy and have nothing of my own. I am asking for alms, so don’t ask me to pay for it. No one buys alms, everyone receives it for free. So You “save me according to Your mercy.” Remember Your words, which You have spoken in Your holy Scriptures. Remember, Lord, that “the intent of the heart of man is evil from his youth” (Gen. 8:21). Remember, Lord, that the dust You created is on fire and has blood. Remember, Lord, that “man is like vanity” (Ps. 143:4), that “no one living will be justified before You” (Ps. 142:2). Remember, Master, that “if ... you see iniquity, Lord, Lord, who can stand?” (Ps. 129:3). Remember, Master, that “how can a man be right before God, and how can one born of a woman be pure? Even the moon, even that one, is not bright, and the stars are unclean in His sight” (Job 25:4-5). Remember, Lord, that “behold, I was conceived in iniquity, and my mother gave birth to me in sin” (Ps. 50:7). Remember, Master, that heaven itself, and even the angelic powers, are not pure before You, even if some of them fell from heaven for their sin. Therefore, “save me according to Thy mercy,” me who asks Thy mercy. After all, it will not be at all surprising if You have mercy on the worthy; there will be nothing strange if You have mercy on the righteous, because he is worthy of it. And if you glorify the zealous, nothing special will happen: it will be a matter of simple justice. But on me, unworthy, You show Your amazing mercies, so that Your love for mankind may be glorified in me. So the doctor is then considered skillful, glorified and praised when he cures incurable and hopeless diseases; and the king is then considered good when he gives life to the unworthy. As Creator, You know the weakness of our nature; You know her as the one who received and saved her. Therefore, now “save me according to Your mercy”; may my malice not overcome Your compassion, may my negligence not exhaust Your inexhaustible love for mankind. For how many good deeds should I be grateful to your unspeakable goodness! You brought me from non-existence into being, multiplied me, exalted me, and put everything under my feet (Ps. 8:8). Then You redeemed the lost and slain with Your own blood, You covered the naked, You enriched the poor; You have made me a son, a brother, an heir, and a joint heir. And what answer I will give for all this - I am perplexed. Therefore - “do not go into judgment with Your servant” (Ps. 143:2) and do not turn your threats on my sins, but “turn away Your face from my sins” (Ps. 50:11). Do not set the scales according to strict justice, but be philanthropic, tilt them from this side to this, from my heaviness towards Your mercy; ignore the heaviness of my iniquities, pass silence is the multitude of my sins and “save me according to Thy mercy,” by which all the saved have received salvation. If I call Moses, and he is not sinless, according to the testimony of Scripture; if I remember Aaron or even Peter himself, the supreme and great one, they are not sinless and blameless. Therefore, I want to be saved by faith, by faith, and not by works, so that the Lover of Mankind would say to me: “Your faith has saved you; Go in peace” (Luke 8:48). Whoever you forgave sins, you didn’t say to anyone: “Your works have saved you,” because before Him all human truth is like bleeding sackcloth. Therefore, I will repeat again: “save me by Thy mercy.” And: “[Thy] mercy... will follow me all the days of my life” (Ps. 22:6). “Thy mercy will follow me,” who angrily runs away from You and constantly hastens to sin. “Thy mercy” will hold me back, muzzled and bridleed, it will lead me away from You, because You are God, “the only one who works wonders” (Ps. 71:18). Therefore, “show Your mercy wondrously and save those who trust [in You]" (Ps. 16:7). You fulfill our hopes and hopes - will you really not fulfill our requests for mercy? Someone owed You ten thousand talents and came to You to ask for a little more respite; and You, Lover of Mankind, wanted to completely forgive him all ten thousand if he had not offended his brother after this. The once dissolute son returned to You, wanting to be one of Your hired servants, and You made him a son and heir. The thief asked You only to remember him in Your kingdom, and You honored him with paradise itself. The harlot came to You only crying, without any request, and received from You what she hoped for and what she was looking for. Peter cried, asking for forgiveness, and you made him the key keeper of the kingdom and the church. This is Your will for those who have fallen into extreme despair, who have lost all hope, who are ahead of sin to the very bottom of hell. Show them the greatness of Your love for mankind. Therefore, I say again and will not stop saying: “Save me according to Your mercy. For none of the dead remember You, but in... hell... who confesses You?" (Ps. 6:5-6). Because of this I am in a hurry, because of this I am afraid, because of this I will languish, knowing firmly that if the end of my life unexpectedly overtakes me, then from hell I will no longer be able to bring my confession to You. In hell there is no repentance, no deliverance from death, no hope of relief. Our life is a marketplace; once it is closed, no one can trade anymore. When the competition is over, no one can compete and receive the crown. When night falls, the meeting and (receiving) profit ceases. Listen to what Scripture says about every person who has ended his life: “What is light given to a person whose path is closed, and whom God has surrounded with darkness?” ( Job 3:23 ). So, if God shut it down, what kind of repentance for sin can there be? This life is for work, and that life is for crowns. In this life (God’s) love for mankind (acts), and in that life there is true righteous judgment. Therefore - “save me by Your mercy. For none of the dead remembers You, and in... hell... who confesses You?" Who? No one! The Prophet, constantly remembering that terrible day and hour, had an insurmountable fear, was tormented by incessant mental pain, grieved and spent the nights crying. That's why he says: "I was weary with my sighs, every night I wash my bed with my tears I water my bed” (Ps. 6:7), knowing for sure that those who sow with tears will joyfully reap the ears of heaven (life). “They who went and wept, throwing away their seeds, but those who came will come with joy” - in the resurrection, “gathering their sheaves” (Ps. 125:6). Just as we are baptized with water and the Spirit, so by being baptized with the water of tears and the fire of hot spiritual pain, we receive cleansing. Both baptism and true tearful contrition are never given without the Holy Spirit. “My eye is darkened by wrath, I am worn out among all my enemies” (Ps. 6:8), i.e. mired, grew and grew old in sins. This is what the words mean: “I have become worn out among all my enemies.” But pay attention: having become rigid and old in sins, having become accustomed to them, the prophet did not despair of himself, did not lose hope in the mercy of God, but was saved by contrition, cleansed with tears and with determination to say to his enemies: “Depart from me, all who practice iniquity” (Ps. 6:9). Stop it, be ashamed, retreat. “The Lord heard my prayer in old age, the Lord accepted my prayer” (Ps. 6:10). “Let all my enemies be ashamed and dismayed; let them turn back and be ashamed very quickly” (Ps. 6:11). Have you seen the power of tears? Have you seen the fruit of repentance? Have you seen renewal and rebirth after decrepitude in all sins? So don’t say: I am old, weak, stubborn in every sin and no longer have the strength to fulfill the commandments of Christ. You can’t say anything like that now, you can’t excuse yourself with various sinful excuses. And if you start making excuses, I will immediately prove to you that if you just want to, you can even keep the commandments of Christ better in old age than in your youth. Just answer my questions truthfully, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3). When is a person’s spirit more inclined to humility - in old age or in youth? Obviously in old age. And youth is, as it were, innately proud. “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4). Just tell me: who is more susceptible to tears and crying - youth or old age? Old age, anyway. “Blessed are the meek” (Matthew 5:5). Doesn’t everyone agree that in youth all movements of the soul are stronger and more ardent, and old age is more inclined than youth to every service and divine commandment? In fact, in youth, physical love flares up, and the flame of the love of money fights, and there are many other passions, such as vanity, gluttony and rancor. In old age, it’s completely different: here are tears of contrition, generated in us by the fear of God, and thoughts of death and punishment. And if we abide in them and labor, we will also achieve spiritual tears, by the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever. Amen. Creations attributed to St. John Chrysostom and in the Patrology of Min, classified as Spuria The paragraphs in the text were arranged by us. – Editorial staff of “ABC of Faith” You might be interested in: