63. Хлопоты по дому. Пение и музыка

I was in a hurry to quickly finish my speech about the struggle with the passionate - although here you can never reach the end - and left much of what you wrote about at that time almost unanswered. You will find the answer to other things in what is written, and to others I will answer now. You write that you have a lot of trouble around the house. Do whatever you are told to do with diligence. It's your duty. But don’t bother, don’t bother. Trouble (care) is accompanied by agitation of everything internal, and this is not a proper thing. Isn’t it possible to discuss everything assigned calmly, and then do it without worrying at all, with a collected thought? In everyday life, if there is anything that interferes with spiritual life, then it is not work or activity at all, but empty over-concern that wears out the heart, meanwhile, cannot move the matter even a hair forward, and these alarms, which sweep up thoughts like a whirlwind. This always results in a crush, but things never get done. Please distinguish between due diligence and undue care and fuss, and learn to do all things soberly, without deviating in thought from the Lord, but, on the contrary, holding the conviction that you are pleasing Him with all this. You ask: “What about singing and playing the piano and harmonium? I used to play and sing, not paying attention to the content of the plays, but now it gets into my head. It is known that not all plays have good content, although they are put together very harmoniously.” What to do? You can't suddenly change everything. This will immediately catch your eye. Sing and play what you sang and played before, trying not to pay attention to the content. Meanwhile, little by little, select pieces with good or even just tolerable content and sing and play them more, so that the others who force you to sing and play will finally be completely forgotten. The harmonium is very capable of properly expressing church singing. Get out Turchaninov’s works and learn from them what you like best. Learn “God Save the King,” “How Glorious is Our Lord in Zion,” and the like. If you sing any of this kind of plays with full feeling, I assure you that you will like it more than anything else. And then they will ask you to sing and play not some empty little pieces, but precisely these majestic creations. A long time ago you mentioned that your voice and singing were praised. They do their job, and you do yours. When both are good, how not to praise? But you should not boast about it, but humble yourself. Where did you get your voice and taste for singing? God gave. What did God give for?! To scratch the ears of others or something else?! Nothing else but that you turn them to the glory of God. Is that what you did? No. You only amused yourself and others, but you had no mention of God at all. So, you abused the gift of God, wasting it for nothing. Now your thoughts have turned to pleasing God; turn your thoughts there to using the gift of God. If you need to eat and drink for the glory of God, then even more so sing and play. If you play and sing something that will touch the soul of those who hear it and make them sigh to the Lord or ascend to Him with praise and thanksgiving, then you will do the same thing that a good preacher does in church. And behold, the saving fruit of the gift is given to you! Please direct its use to this side. Select both secular and spiritual edifying plays and just sing and play them. This is for others, but on your own, never sing anything secular, but everything spiritual. But I’ll repeat again: don’t break it suddenly, but slowly. And in general, don’t show any special features in anything. Be as friendly, good-natured and cheerful with everyone as always. Just refrain from laughter, ridicule and all idle talk. And without this you can be friendly, and cheerful, and pleasant. Never be gloomy under any circumstances. When the Savior told those who were fasting to wash themselves, anoint their heads and comb their hair, he meant precisely so that they would not be gloomy (Matthew 6:16-17). You might be interested in: