Книга третья. О внутреннем утешении

CHAPTER 1. About the inner conversation of Christ with a faithful soul I will hear what my Lord says about me. Blessed is the soul that hears the Lord speaking within itself and receives the word of consolation from His lips. Blessed are the ears that receive the quiet voice of divine whispering, and do not pay any attention to the noise of this world. Blessed indeed are those ears that listen not to the external sound of speech, but to the internal broadcast and teaching of truth. Blessed are those eyes that are closed to the external and directed to the internal. Blessed is he who penetrates into the inner, and, exercising daily, tries more and more to prepare himself for the reception of the heavenly mysteries. Blessed is he who with a joyful heart desires to be abolished for God, and shakes off everything that hinders him in this age. Hear this, my soul, and close the doors of your sensuality, so that you may hear what the Lord your God says in you. Behold, says your Beloved: I am your salvation—your peace and your life. Keep yourself close to Me, and you will find peace for yourself. Leave everything that is transitory and seek the eternal. Whatever is temporary, isn’t it all just seduction? And what will any creation benefit you if the Creator leaves you? Renounce everything and surrender yourself to the Creator, a pleasing and faithful soul, so that you may perceive true bliss. Chapter 2. About the fact that truth speaks silently in the soul “Speak, O Lord, that Your servant will hear. I am Your servant. Give me understanding and I will know Your revelations. Incline my heart into the words of Your mouth, so that Your words may descend like dew,” as the children of Israel once said to Moses, “Speak to us, and let not God speak to us, lest we die.” This is not what I ask, Lord, this is not what I ask, but with Samuel the prophet I humbly and earnestly cry out: “Speak, Lord, as Thy servant hears.” Let not Moses speak to me, or any other of the prophets; but You speak, Lord God, to all the prophets, Inspirer and Enlightener. You alone can instruct me completely without them; and they won’t help anything without You. They may sound like words, but they do not convey spirit. Words are spoken in all their beauty, but when You are silent, hearts do not ignite. They communicate the letter, but You reveal the meaning. They depict sacraments, but You remove the seal of understanding. They declare commands, and You give power to do things. They show the way, and You strengthen them for the journey. They only act on the outside, but You instruct and enlighten the hearts. They irrigate from without, and You give fruitful power. They cry out with words, but You give understanding to the ears. Let the word not come to me from Moses, but speak to me, O Lord my God, the eternal truth, lest I die a death and let me not be left without fruit, unless instruction comes to me from without and does not burn within. Let not the word I have heard and not done, what I have known but not loved, what has been entrusted to me and not been kept, be of condemnation to me. Say, O Lord, that Thy servant heareth; You are the verbs of the belly of the eternal imashi. Speak to me in every possible way for the consolation of my soul and for the correction of my whole life, and for Your glory and endless honor. 1) 1 Samuel 3:9. Ps. 118:125. Ref. 20:19 3) John. 6:68. Chapter 3. That we should listen to the words of God in humility Hear, son, My words. My words are filled with sweetness, and exceed all knowledge of all the philosophers and sages of this world. My words are spirit and life, and are not comprehended by the human mind. One must not look for vain self-pleasure in them, but listen to them in silence and accept them with all the desire of the soul and with all humility. And I said: “Blessed is man, even if you punish him, O Lord, and teach him from Your law, may he have rest in evil days, and may he not be abandoned on earth.” “I,” says the Lord, “taught the prophets from the beginning, and even to this day I have ceased to speak to everyone: but many are deaf and dumb and hard-hearted to My voice.” Many are more willing to listen to the world than to God, more inclined to follow the desires of their flesh than God's good pleasure. Temporary and meager things promise peace, and they serve the world with great zeal: I promise the highest and the eternal, and the hearts of mortals will be hardened. Who serves and obeys Me with such care in everything, as they serve the world and its authorities? Be humbled, Sidon, says the sea, and when you ask what is the shame, listen. For a small profit they make a long journey: for eternal life, many barely lift their foot from the ground. They chase for nothing - sometimes they compete for one coin to the point of disgrace; for an empty thing and because of an insignificant calculation, they are not afraid to exhaust themselves day and night. But, alas! for the sake of unchangeable good, for the sake of priceless reward, for the sake of supreme honor and endless glory - laziness and a little work! Be ashamed, lazy and hasty slave, for they show more readiness for destruction than you for life. They rejoice more in vanity than you do in the truth. But in their hope they are often deceived, but My promise does not betray anyone, and whoever trusts in Me will not return empty. What I promised I will give; what I said, I will fulfill, if only a person remains faithful to the end in My love. I am the Rewarder of all good things, and I test all the reverent with a strong test. Write My words in your heart and meditate on them diligently: you will have great need of them during your time of trial. What you did not understand when you read, you will understand on the day of your visit. I will thoroughly test My chosen ones: I will test them both in temptation and in consolation, and I lay down two lessons for them every day: one for exposing vices, the other for admonishing them to grow in virtues. Whoever has My words and rejects them will have one who judges him on the last day. Prayer for the gift of reverence. Lord, my God! You are my everything. And who am I - that I dare to speak to You with my word? I am the poorest of the poor, Your servant and an insignificant worm, poor and despised more than any thought and any word. But remember me for this, Lord, that I am nothing - and I am worth nothing, and I have nothing. You alone are good and holy and righteous: You can do everything, you bestow everything, you fulfill everything, and you only leave the sinner in poverty. Remember Thy mercies, O Lord, and fill my heart with Thy grace: it is not Thy will, O Lord, that the work of Thy hands rest in vain. How can I endure myself in this miserable life if You do not strengthen me with Your mercy and grace? Do not turn Your face away from me, do not remove Your visitation from me, and do not take Your consolation from me, lest my soul be like a waterless land to You. Teach me, Lord, to do Your will; teach me to walk worthily and humbly before You, for all my wisdom is in You and You know me in truth, and knew me before the world was created, and before I was born into the world. 1) John 6:63. 2) Is. 93:12,13. 3) Is. 23:4. 5) In. 12:48. 7) Ps. 142:6,10. Chapter 4. About what we should walk before God in humility and truth My son, walk before Me in truth, and in the simplicity of your heart always seek Me. Whoever walks before Me in the truth will be safe from vain misfortunes, and the truth will free him from seducers and from the slander of the wicked. If the truth sets you free, you will be free in truth, and you will not care about the vain talk of men. Your word is true, O Lord. Be unto me according to Thy word. May Thy Truth itself teach me, may it itself keep me and preserve me to the saving end; may She herself free me from all bad and disorderly attachments, and I will begin to walk with You in great freedom of heart. “I will teach you,” says the Truth, “what is right and acceptable before Me. Think about your sins with great disgust and sorrow, and never dream anything about yourself for good deeds. In truth, you are a sinner, devoted to passions and entangled in many passions. By yourself you always strive for insignificance; you easily fall and are overcome, you soon become embarrassed and disintegrate. You have nothing to boast about, but there is much for which you need to humiliate yourself, for you are much weaker than you can imagine. Do not have a high opinion of anything, no matter what you do. Let nothing seem great to you, nothing precious and worthy of admiration or good opinion, nothing lofty, nothing truly praiseworthy and desirable, nothing when it is not eternal. Let the eternal truth be the most beautiful thing for you, and let your extreme unworthiness be the most disgusting of all. Fear more than anything in the world, abhor and avoid your vices and sins most of all: let them seem more terrible to you than all worldly losses. Other people do not walk before Me sincerely, but in a spirit of some kind of inquisitiveness and self-will, they want to know My secrets and understand the heights of God, forgetting about themselves and their salvation. They often fall into great temptations and sins because of their arrogance, pride and inquisitiveness when I turn away from them. Fear the judgments of God, fear the wrath of the Almighty: but do not philosophize about the deeds of the Most High God, but examine your iniquities, what you have sinned in and how much good you have left unattended. Some believe all their piety only in books, others in images, and others in external signs and marks. Some people have My name in their mouths, but they do not have Me in their hearts. But there are people who are enlightened in mind and purified in heart: they strive with all their breath for the eternal, are burdened to hear about earthly things, and with sadness submit to the needs of nature. They feel in their souls what the spirit of truth is telling them - they hear that it teaches them to despise earthly things and love heavenly things, to despise the world and desire heaven day and night incessantly. Chapter 5. About the wondrous action of Divine love Blessed are you, Heavenly Father, Father of my Lord Jesus Christ, that you have deigned to remember me as a beggar! Father of generosity and God of all consolation, I give You praise for sometimes renewing me, unworthy of any consolation, with Your consolation. Blessed art thou ever and glorified with Thy Only Begotten Son and with the Holy Spirit, the Comforter, unto the ages of ages. Amen. Yes, Lord, Holy God, who deigned to love me, when you come into my heart, my whole inner self will rejoice with joy. You are my glory and the joy of my heart. You are my hope and my refuge in the day of my trouble. But I am still weak in love and imperfect in virtue, I still need strengthening and consolation, and for this, visit me more often and teach me the holy rules. Free me from evil and crazy passions, and heal my heart from all disordered love, may my soul be healthy and may my heart be purified, so that I can love, so that I can be strengthened in patience and established in constancy before You. Love is a great thing—truly and a great good it is: it alone makes light from hard things and endures every unevenness evenly: for it bears heaviness without burden, and transforms everything bitter into sweet and pleasant. Pure love for Jesus moves one to great deeds and arouses in the soul desires for one more perfection than the other. Love always strives upward, and does not suffer delays from any lower deeds. Love wants to be free and alien to any worldly attachment, so that its inner vision is not confused by anything, so that no temporary good binds it, so that temporary loss does not weaken it. There is nothing sweeter than love, nothing stronger, nothing higher, nothing wider, nothing more pleasant, nothing more complete, nothing better than it, neither on earth nor in heaven. For love is born of God, and in God alone it can rest above all creation. He who loves flies, strives, rejoices. He is free - nothing holds him back. He gives everything for everything and has everything in everything, for above everything rests in the One, which is above everything, from where all good flows and comes. He does not look at the gift, but turns to the Giver, past all the blessings. Love often knows no limits, but it flares up beyond all measure. Love does not feel a burden, does not think about labor: what there is no strength for, it strives to achieve. She doesn’t talk about impossibilities, because she dares to do anything. And so she has power for everything, and she fills and brings into action many things where he who does not have love falls away and is overthrown. Love is awake and does not sleep in sleep, does not become exhausted in fatigue, does not lose freedom in constraint, is not embarrassed in fear: but like a living flame and a burning torch, it strives upward and penetrates safely everywhere. He who loves knows what this voice cries out for. A great cry is heard by God in the fiery desire of the soul, crying out: “God, my God, my Love, You are all mine and I am all Yours. Expand me in love, let me taste with the lips of my heart how sweet it is to love and melt and rush in love. Obsessed with love, I want to rise above myself, in an excess of ardor and amazement. I want to sing a song of love, I want to follow You, Beloved, into the heights. My soul is amazed in Your praise, celebrating You with love. I want to love You more than myself, and myself - for You alone I want to love, and to love everyone in You who truly loves You, as the law of love that has shone from You commands. Love is swift, sincere, pious, pleasant and sweet, strong, patient, faithful, reasonable, generous, courageous, and never seeks itself. As soon as someone begins to search for himself, he immediately falls away from love. Love is prudent, humble, simple - not effeminate, not frivolous, not busy with vain affairs, sober, chaste, firm, quiet and protected in all feelings. Love is submissive and obedient to its superiors, but is humiliated and contemptuous before itself, before God in reverence and praise. It always believes in Him, always trusts in Him - even when God does not allow Him to hear Himself: for love does not live without sorrow. He who is not ready to endure everything and be confirmed in the entire will of the Beloved is not worth it to be said about him: “Loves.” He who loves, let him willingly accept, for the sake of the Beloved, everything harsh and bitter, and not fall away from Him for any troubles or misfortunes. Chapter 6. About the test of true love My son, you do not yet know how to love firmly and judiciously. From what, Lord? From the fact that for the slightest disagreement you lag behind your undertakings and too greedily seek consolation. He who loves deeply stands firm in temptations and does not believe the insidious suggestions of the enemy. Just as he desires Me in prosperity, so in adversity he will not cease to desire Me. He who loves judiciously looks not so much at the gift of the lover, but at the love of the Giver. He sees the favor and does not look at the price of the gift, and places the Beloved above all His gifts. High love is not satisfied with a gift, but in Me, above any gift, it rests. All is not lost if sometimes you do not have that ardent feeling for Me or for My saints that you desire. That quiet and sweet feeling that you feel from time to time is the action of inherent grace and, as it were, a foretaste of the heavenly fatherland: do not rely too much on it: it comes and goes. And to fight the evil thoughts that attack the soul, and to despise the devil’s suggestions, this is the sign of virtue and great dignity. So, do not let thoughts that are alien to your dreams, no matter where they come to you, confuse you. Hold fast to your intention and keep your thoughts straight towards God. Do not consider your feeling deceptive because sometimes you suddenly become delighted, and after that you fall again into ordinary madness of the heart: you endure them involuntarily rather than act in them yourself - and if they are disgusting to you and you fight with them, that is your dignity, not your destruction. Know that the ancient enemy is trying in every possible way to frustrate your good desire, and to abolish in you all reverent exercise, and veneration of the saints, and pious remembrance of My passion, and heartfelt thoughts about your sins, and strict observance of the heart, and a firm intention to succeed in virtue. He instills many bad thoughts in order to bring despondency and horror into you, to turn you away from prayer and sacred reading. A humble confession of the heart is disgusting to him, and if he could, he would force you to fall away from holy communion. Don’t trust him and don’t worry about him, no matter how often he lays flattering nets in front of you. Attribute to him yourself that he inspires the evil and unclean. Tell him: “Go away, you unclean spirit, be ashamed, you worthless one; You are vile for whispering such unclean things to me; depart from me, evil seducer; You will not have a single part of me; But Jesus, the mighty warrior, will remain with me, and you will remain put to shame. It is better for me to die and suffer any punishment than to agree with you. Keep silent and be silent, so that I don’t hear you anymore, no matter how much trouble you bring upon me. The Lord is my enlightenment and my Savior - whom will I fear? Even if a regiment turns against me, my heart will not fear, the Lord is my helper and my Savior.” Strive like a good warrior; and if sometimes you fall due to weakness, gather strength within yourself stronger than before, trusting in the increase of My grace, and most of all, beware of vain self-confidence and pride. As a result, many are carried away into error, and sometimes fall into almost incurable blindness. Let the death of these proud people, madly dreaming of themselves, be in your fear and in your everlasting humility. Chapter 7. That grace must be hidden under the guard of humility My son, it is more beneficial for you and safer to hide the gift of reverence, not to rise to heights, not to talk about it much and not to think much, but to despise yourself more and keep yourself, as it were, in fear that you are unworthy of the gift. You should not become too attached to this arrangement, because it may soon change to the opposite. Think in the midst of grace, how poor and helpless you can be when there is no grace. There is no great success for your spiritual life in the fact that you have grace-filled consolation; and this is the benefit for you when you endure the deprivation of grace with humility and obedience and patience: so that even then diligent prayer does not freeze in you, so that you do not allow yourself to completely weaken in your other affairs according to your usual duty, but so that you do everything that lies on you - willingly, at least of your strength and understanding, and do not fall into complete neglect of yourself because you feel dryness or confusion of spirit. Many, when they do not see good success for themselves, immediately fall into impatience or despondency. But a person’s path is not always in his will: every gift is from God; It is God’s business to send comfort when he wants and as much as he wants and to whomever he wants, as it pleases Him, and not beyond measure. Other foolish people turned the gift of reverence into their own destruction, because they wanted to act beyond their strength, forgot the extent of their weakness and followed their heartfelt feeling more than reasonable reasoning. And since they dreamed of themselves above the good pleasure of God, that is why they soon lost grace, and were left in poverty and humiliation. Those who wanted to establish a nest for themselves in heaven, let them know in their humiliation and poverty that they cannot fly on their wings, but under the roof of My wings it is enough to remain in hope. Those who are new and inexperienced in the path of the Lord, if they do not adhere to the advice of knowledgeable mentors in everything, can easily be deceived and perish. If they want to follow their own feeling rather than trust other experienced people, they will have a disastrous outcome when they do not dare to lag behind their own thoughts. He who philosophizes about himself finds it difficult to reconcile himself and give himself over to the control of another person. Better is little knowledge with humility and poverty of understanding than rich treasures of knowledge with vain presumption. It is better to have less than to have much to be proud of. He acts unreasonably who completely gives himself over to joy, forgetting his former poverty and chaste fear of the Lord, and is not afraid of losing the grace given to him. There is no strong spirit in one who, in times of distress or sorrow, falls into excessive despondency, and in his thoughts and feelings does not keep intact his firm trust in Me. Whoever, during times of peace, forgets himself in a sense of security, has no difficulty in appearing sad and fearful during times of struggle. If only you could always keep yourself in humility and moderation, restrain the impulses of the spirit and control them properly, you would not so quickly fall into danger and grief. A good rule for you: during the fervor of the spirit, think about what will happen to you when the light is hidden. Whenever this happens, consider that the light that I removed for a while may appear again, for your caution, and for My glory; for it is often more beneficial for you to endure such a test than to always live in prosperity according to your will. Dignity is not recognized in the fact that a person has many visions and consolations, or is skilled in the scriptures, or ascends to the highest degree; but in the fact that a person is established in true humility and is filled with divine love, in everything he seeks the glory of God with a pure and disinterested thought, he regards himself as nothing and sincerely despises, and among others he prefers to be humiliated and in contempt rather than in honor. Chapter 8. About humiliation of oneself in the eyes of God “I will cry to my Lord, I am earth and ashes.” If I dream anything higher about myself, then You stand before me, and my iniquities will be a testimony of the truth, and I will have nothing to answer against the testimony. If I diminish myself, reduce myself to insignificance and abandon my high opinion of myself, and imagine myself as what I am, dust, then Your grace will bow to me and Your light will approach my heart; then every slightest dream about myself will disappear into the abyss of my insignificance and perish forever. There you will show me to myself, what I am, what I was and where I came from; for I was humbled and did not understand this. If I am left to myself, then I am nothing and sheer weakness; but as soon as You look at me, I immediately become strong and filled with new joy. And it’s a great miracle how suddenly you lift me up and with what meekness you embrace me when my own heaviness keeps pushing me down. Your love does this, freely precedes me and helps me in my many needs, and protects me from grave dangers, and, in truth, rescues me from countless disasters. I ruined myself by not truly loving myself, and in that same thing I find both myself and You, that I seek You alone and love with pure love, and love plunged me even deeper into my insignificance. You, O sweetest God, have done with me beyond all worth and beyond what I would have dared to ask or hope for. Blessed are you, my God! I am not worthy of any good, but Your greatness and endless generosity never ceases to do good to the ungrateful and to those who have moved away from You for a long time. Turn us to You, let us be grateful in heart, humble and reverent, for You are our salvation, You are our strength and strength. 1) Life 18:27. Ps. 72:22. Chapter 9. About the fact that everything must be attributed to God as the final end My son, it is necessary that I be your supreme and last end, if you want to be truly blessed. In this thought your feeling will be purified: too often it becomes crooked, leaning either towards yourself or towards other creatures. As soon as you begin to look for yourself in something, you immediately become impoverished and dry up in yourself: and for this, first of all, you must attribute everything to Me: for everything is in Me and everything is given by Me. Whatever you imagine, remember that everything comes from the Supreme Good, and therefore everything should be attributed to Me, the single Origin. From Me, both small and great, poor and rich, draw living water, as from a living spring, and whoever serves Me voluntarily and freely will receive grace upon grace. And whoever, without Me, wants to be famous or enjoy his special good, will not be established in true joy and will not expand his heart, but will endure all kinds of care and oppression. Do not attribute to yourself a single good, and do not attribute any virtue to any person, but attribute everything to God, for without Him man has nothing. Everything has been given by me, and I want to return everything back to Myself, and with great severity I demand thanksgiving. That is, the truth from which vain glory flees. And when heavenly grace and true love enter the heart, there will be no envy or constraint in it, and its own love will not occupy it. For divine love conquers everything and expands all spiritual powers. If your desire is true, you will rejoice in Me Alone, you will trust in Me Alone, for no one is good, only God alone, and to Him belongs praise over all and blessing in all. Chapter 10. How sweet it is to serve God, despising the world Behold, I will speak again, O Lord, and will not be silent. I will say in the ear of God, my Lord and King, who is on high: “How much of Your goodness, O Lord, hast Thou hidden for those who fear Thee!” What about those who love You, what about those who serve You with all their hearts? The truly indescribable sweetness of Your contemplation: with that sweetness You will reward those who love You. In this you most clearly showed me the sweetness of Your love, that You created me, who did not exist, and brought me far from You, who had gone astray, that I might serve You, and commanded that I might love You. O source of unceasing love, what can I say about You? How can I forget about You when You have deigned me to remember! When I was exhausted and perished, You showed mercy to Your servant beyond all hope, and showed Your grace and fellowship beyond my worthiness. What will I repay You for that grace of Yours? Not everyone is given the ability to renounce everything, renounce the world and accept the monastic life. What is great in the fact that I will serve You, Whom every creation has been appointed to serve? I should not consider this to be great, but rather it seems great and worthy of wonder to me that You were pleased to accept such a poor and unworthy person as a slave and to associate him with Your beloved servants. Behold, all Your essence is what I have and how I serve You. But truly, You serve me more than I serve You. Both heaven and earth, created by You to serve man, are always in line before You, and every day they do everything that You commanded them. And this is not enough: for You also established angels to serve man. But above all, You deigned to serve man and promised to give Yourself to him. For all the multitude of Your blessings, what will I repay You? Oh, that I might serve You all the days of my life! Oh, if only for one day I would be able to show worthy service! Verily, You are worthy of all service, all honor and eternal praise. Truly, You are my Lord, and I am Your poor servant and I am obliged to serve You with all my might, and I must never weaken in Your praise. This is what I want, this I desire, and what I lack, You deign to fill. Great honor, great glory to serve You and to despise everything for Your sake: for those who, of their own free will, bring themselves into Your most holy slavery will receive great grace: they will find the sweetest consolation of the Holy Spirit. Great freedom of spirit has been achieved by those who, for the sake of Your name, enter the narrow path and leave all worldly concerns. Oh, gracious and joyful slavery to God: truly in it a person becomes holy and free! Oh, what a sacred state of monastic service: it makes a person equal to the angels, pleasing to God, terrible to evil spirits and praiseworthy among all the faithful! How not to accept, how not to desire in every possible way this service, when it acquires the supreme good, through it joy is achieved that endures without end! Chapter 11. About what should test and moderate the desires of the heart My son, you still need to learn a lot: you have not yet learned it firmly. So that you would completely submit your desire to My will, and would not love yourself with love, but would desire My will with all your desire and would follow it. Desires often kindle you and carry you away swiftly: but think about what moves you more - Is it my glory or your own honor and benefit? If I am in your subject, you will be pleased no matter how I arrange it; and when you have your own care hidden in something, therein lies your difficulty, in it lies your burden. Beware, do not stubbornly hold on to a desire when, without My advice, it was conceived in you: so that later you do not repent, so that later you do not become disgusted with what you liked at first, what you were jealous of as the best good. Not every spiritual attraction, even if good is seen in it, must be immediately followed; and also not to immediately run away from everything, which at first is contrary to the feeling. It is good sometimes to impose a rein on yourself even in good pursuits and desires, so that the untimely striving of thought does not lead you into distraction, so that you do not cause others to be tempted by your self-will, and also so that, having encountered opposition from others, you do not become embarrassed and lose heart. Sometimes you need to force yourself to forcibly and courageously resist the attraction of feelings, and not pay attention to what the flesh wants and what it does not want; but to arrange everything more so that the flesh is subjugated to the spirit even against its will. And until then it is necessary to pacify and enslave her until she is ready for anything and learns to be content with little and find pleasure in simple things, and not to grumble at any inconvenience. Chapter 12. About the science of patience and the fight against lusts I see, Lord God, that I really need patience, for many contrary things happen in life, and no matter how I arrange for the world around me, my life cannot be without struggle and without sorrow. Yes, My son. Seek peace not where there are no temptations and where you do not feel anything contrary: but I want you to honor yourself in peace even then, when you are in burden from various calamities and in trial from many oppositions. If you say that you do not have the strength to endure much, then how will you endure the purifying fire? You must always choose the lesser of two evils: and in order to avoid future eternal torments, try to endure real disasters for the sake of God with indifference. Do you think that the people of this century tolerate nothing or tolerate little? When you ask the most pampered people, you won’t find it with them. But they, you say, have many pleasures; They follow their own will, and therefore think little about their misfortunes. So be it; let them have everything they want; but do you think it will last long? Those who are rich in this age will disappear like smoke, and there will be no memory of past pleasures. But even in this life, not without bitterness, not without melancholy and fear, they rest on their joys. The very thing in which they took pleasure often brings them sorrow and torment afterwards. And it is righteous for this to be true: when people randomly seek pleasure and indulge in them, it is impossible for them to fully enjoy it without bitterness and embarrassment. Oh, how brief they are, how deceptive, how disorderly and base, all these pleasures! People in their rapture and blindness do not understand this: but like dumb animals, for the small pleasure of a corruptible life, they bring their soul to death. But you, My son, do not follow your lusts and your disgusting will. Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the petitions of your heart. But if you truly want to enjoy and receive abundant consolation from Me, in the contempt of everything worldly and in the rejection of all corruptible pleasure, your blessing will be, and you will be rewarded with much consolation. And the more you remove yourself from all consolation in creation, the more sweet and real consolations you will find in Me. But before you achieve them, you will not be without sorrow at first and not without hard struggle. An old habit persists, but a better habit will overcome it. Murmurs will arise from the flesh, but the flesh will be curbed by the zeal of the spirit. The ancient serpent will inflame and irritate you, but prayer will drive him away; and besides that, with useful labor, the main entrance will be closed to him. Chapter 13. About the obedience of the humble following the example of Jesus Christ My Son, whoever tries to evade obedience deviates himself from grace, and whoever seeks something special for himself loses what is generally given to everyone. When someone does not submit to his boss willingly and of his own free will, it means that his flesh does not yet completely obey him, but often resists and complains. Learn to immediately submit to your boss if you want to subdue your flesh: for you will sooner defeat the external enemy if the internal man is not weakened. Of all the enemies, the most difficult and most destructive to your soul is yourself, when you do not have good agreement with the spirit. You need to embrace true contempt for yourself if you want to master flesh and blood: for you still love yourself too disorderly, and that is why you are afraid to completely surrender yourself to someone else’s will. But is it a great thing that you, dust and insignificance, would submit yourself to man for the sake of God, when I, the Almighty and Most High, who created everything out of nothing, humbly submitted to man for your sake? I humbled and humiliated Myself below all others, so that you could overcome your pride through My humility. Learn to obey, dust, learn to humble yourself, earth and mud, and bow down at the foot of everyone. Learn to refract your desires and give yourself into all submission. Be jealous of yourself, do not tolerate an arrogant spirit in yourself, but show such humility in yourself, make yourself so small that everyone can walk over you and trample you like dirt along the road. Do you have anything to complain about, you indecent person? Unclean sinner, how will you contradict those who revile you, when how many times have you offended God, how many times have you become guilty of hell? But My eye spared you, for your soul appeared before My face to be of great value, so that you may know My love and may you always remain in praise before Me of My good deeds and may you surrender yourself to completely true obedience and humility, and in patience may you endure your own contempt. Chapter 14 Your judgments thundered over me, O Lord, and You struck all my bones with horror and trembling, and my soul was terrified with great fear. I am amazed, I stand and think that even the sky is unclean in Your eyes. If You saw something obstinate in the angels and did not spare them, what will happen to me? The stars have fallen from heaven, and I, dust of the earth, what do I think of myself? Those whose deeds seemed praiseworthy fell into the underworld, and those who ate the bread of angels, I saw, were glad to eat acorns and pork feed. So, there is no holiness, not a single one, if You take away Your hand, Lord. No wisdom is of any use when You have left to rule. No fortress will help when You have stopped protecting. No chastity is safe when You do not cover it. All vigilance about oneself is insignificant when You are not on holy watch. Abandoned by You, we drown and perish, in Your visit we live and are raised. We are fickle, but we are strengthened by You; We grow cold, but You inflame us. Oh, how humbly and lowly should I think of myself! What a nonentity I should consider when there seems to be good in me! Oh, how deeply must I plunge into the abyss of Your judgments, Lord, where I find nothing else in myself except nothingness and insignificance. Oh, immeasurable majesty, oh, impenetrable abyss, where I find nothing in myself except sheer insignificance! Where is the refuge of glory, where is the confidence that comes from glory? In the depths of Your judgments, all vain glory about me has disappeared. What is all flesh in Your sight? Food says to the poor man: what are you doing? Can one whose heart is truly submissive to God be exalted in vanity? The whole world will not exalt the one whom the truth has conquered, and all the voices of praise will not move him who has established his trust in God. For even those who praise are all nothing, and with the sound of their words they disappear. But the truth of the Lord endures forever. 1) 15:15.4.18. 2 Peter 2:4. 4) Is. 45:9. Ps. 116:2. Chapter 15. How to support yourself and what you need to tell yourself when you want something My son, say this about everything: “Lord, if it pleases You, let it be done. Lord, if this be for Your glory, in Your name, let it be fulfilled. Lord, if according to Your judgment this is what I should do, and it will benefit me, then grant me what I desire, for Your glory. But if, according to Your mind, this will harm me and will not serve to save my soul, take away my desire.” For not every will is from the Holy Spirit, although it seems righteous and right and good to a person. It is difficult to truly judge whether a good or an evil spirit prompts you to desire this or that, or whether you are moved by your own spirit. It seemed to many at first that they were motivated by a good spirit, but in the end they were deceived. So, you must always desire and ask with the fear of God and with heartfelt humility, when something desirable comes to mind: especially, you must surrender yourself entirely to Me, in renunciation of your will, and say like this: “Lord, You know what is best to be: and let it be one way or another as You please. Grant me whatever You want, as much as You want, whenever You want. Do with me according to Your mind, and as will be pleasing to You, and as is appropriate to increase Your praise. Place me where You please, and do everything with me in all Your will. I am in Your hand, rotate and turn me around. So, I am Your servant and I am ready for anything before You, and not for myself, but for You, I want to live - oh, when would I live worthily and perfectly!” Prayer for the fulfillment of God's good will. Send down upon me, most still Jesus, your grace, may it be with me and may it remain even to the end. Grant me to always desire and want what is more pleasing and favorable to You. May Your will be my will, and may my will always follow Your will and agree with it in everything. May my desire and my unwillingness be one with You, and may all power to want when You do not want, and to turn away when You do not dislike, be taken away from me. Grant me to die for everything that is in the world, and to love, so that for Your sake I will be despised and not known in this century. Grant me, above all desire, to rest in You, and to reconcile my heart in You. You are the real peace to my heart, You are the only peace. Except for You, there is burden in everything, there is anxiety in everything. I will sleep and rest in peace, which is in You, in the One and Highest and Eternal Good. Amen. Chapter 16. We must seek consolation in the one God Whatever I can wish for, whatever I can think about for my consolation, I do not expect it here, but in the future. If I had all the pleasures of this world and enjoyed all its joys, it is true that all this could not last long. Therefore, it is impossible for you, my soul, to have complete consolation and complete pleasure in anything except in God, Who is the Comforter of the poor and the refuge of the humble. Wait a little, my soul, wait for the Divine promise, and you will receive the wealth of all blessings in heaven. If you want this present indiscriminately, you will lose the eternal and heavenly. May the temporary be for your temporary needs, and the eternal for your cherished desire. You cannot be satisfied with any temporary good, for you were not created to enjoy temporary good. Even though you have all the blessings of creation, you cannot be happy and blessed, but in God, who created everything, all your bliss and happiness consists - not the kind that crazy lovers of the world imagine and praise, but the kind that the good and faithful servants of Christ yearn for, and which spiritual and pure-hearted people sometimes taste, their own conversion in heaven. All earthly consolation is vain and brief. That blessed and eternal consolation that truth sees with the inner eye. A reverent man carries his Comforter Jesus with him everywhere, and says to Him: abide with me, Lord Jesus, in every place and at all times. Let it be a consolation for me that I will begin to desire with all my soul - to be without any human consolation. And if Your consolation departs from me, may Your will and Your righteous judgment be my final consolation. For You are not completely angry, You are always at enmity. 1) Phil. 3:20. Ps. 102:9. Chapter 17. All care must be entrusted to God My son, leave me to do with you what I please. I know what you need. You, as a person, think and feel many things as human inclination inspires you. Your word is true, O Lord. Your care for me is greater than any care I can take for myself; for everything depends on chance, who does not cast all his care on You. Lord, if only my will simply and firmly abide in You, do for me everything that pleases You: no matter what You do with me, nothing else can happen except good. If you want me to be in darkness, be blessed; if you want me to be in the light: be blessed again; you favor me as a consolation: be blessed; You will be kind to me in my tribulation: and then be blessed forever. My son, this is how you need to stand if you want to walk with Me. You must be as ready to suffer as you are ready to rejoice. One must live in poverty and poverty with the same desire as in abundance and wealth. Lord, for Your sake I will willingly endure everything with which You deign to come to me. I equally want to accept good and bad from Your hand, sweet and bitter, joyful and sorrowful, and for everything that follows me, I give You praise. Keep me from all sin, and I will not fear death or hell. If only You do not reject me into eternity, if only You do not blot me out of the book of life, nothing will harm me, no matter what disaster befalls me. Chapter 18. That temporary disasters must be endured indifferently, following the example of Christ My son, I came down from heaven for your salvation: I took upon myself your illnesses out of love, and not out of need, so that you would learn patience and endure temporary disasters without complaint. From the hour I was born until my exodus on the cross, I did not cease to endure sorrow, and I had a great poverty of all temporary blessings. I often heard great murmurs against myself, endured all kinds of embarrassment and reproach with meekness, accepted ingratitude for good deeds, blasphemy for miracles, reproaches for teaching. Lord, when You were patient in life, fulfilling first of all the will of Your Father: it is righteous that I, a poor sinner, according to Your will, maintain myself in patience, and as long as You please, bear the burden of corruptible life for the sake of my salvation. For although the feeling of real life is painful, yet because of Your grace it has become very valuable, and according to Your example and in the footsteps of Your saints, it has become more bearable and brighter for weak people. It also became much more comforting than it was in the Old Testament, when the door of heaven was closed: and the very path to heaven seemed darker when there were so few who wanted to seek the kingdom of heaven. But even those who were righteous and worthy of salvation at that time could not enter the kingdom of heaven before Thy passion, and until Thy sacred death was completed. Oh, what praise am I obliged to give to You, that You have deigned to show me and all the faithful the right and good path to the eternal kingdom! For Your life is our path, and through holy patience we march towards You, our crown. If You did not go ahead of us and teach us, who would want to follow? Alas! How many people would be left behind if they did not look at Your bright example! Look, we have heard so many of Your miracles and Your teachings, and we still remain cold: what would happen if we did not have such light to follow You! Chapter 19 What are you saying, My son? stop grumbling, look at the suffering of Mine and other saints. You haven't gotten to the point of bleeding yet. You do not suffer much in comparison with those who suffered so much, were in such strong temptation, in such grave calamities, were tested by all kinds of labor in so many ways. And for this you need to bring to mind what burdens others have had, so that it will be easier for you to bear your own, which are much easier. If you don’t feel that your burdens are lighter, see if your impatience is to blame. However, whatever they may be, small or great, try to bear everything with patience. The more you dispose yourself to patience, the more reasonable your deeds and the more merit you will receive: and it will be easier to endure when you diligently prepare yourself with fortitude and the habit of patience. Don’t say this: “I cannot bear this or that from this man, and it is impossible for me to tolerate this: he has seriously offended me, he attributes to me something that never occurred to me. From someone else I would have endured it more easily: - when someone else did this, I would think that I have to endure it.” Such thoughts are crazy, and whoever says this does not think about what virtue there is in patience, and Who rewards it with a crown - but looks more at faces and thinks about his own offense. He is not a true patient who does not want to endure beyond the measure that pleases him, and from whom he does not want to endure. A true patient does not judge from what person a test comes to him: from a superior or from a stranger, from an equal or from an inferior, from a good and holy person or from a depraved and unworthy one: but all the same, from whatever creature, whenever and however many times he encounters opposition, he accepts everything with gratitude from the hand of God and counts it to himself as a great gain: for when a person endures for the sake of God, nothing, no matter how small, is without merit from God. does not pass. Be ready for battle when you want victory. Without fighting you cannot receive the crown of patience. If you don’t want to endure, then you refuse the crown. And if you want a crown, fight courageously, endure it patiently. Without labor there is no point in striving for peace, and without battle you will not achieve victory. God! By Your grace make possible for me what by nature seems impossible to me. You know how little patience I have and how quickly I fall as soon as a small misfortune appears. No matter what tempting attack befalls me, I want to meet each one in your name with love and good will; for it is saving for my soul to suffer and be in distress for Your sake. Chapter 20. About confessing your weakness and about the disasters of this life I confess my iniquity: “I confess my weakness to you, O Lord. Often a small thing makes me despair and sad. I decide to act with firmness, but as soon as a small temptation appears, I fall into great despondency. Sometimes the most insignificant thing causes a grave temptation. As soon as I consider myself somewhat safe, I don’t feel anything, and suddenly I see that I almost completely fell from a light breeze. Look, O Lord, at my humility and at my weakness, known to You from everywhere. Have mercy on me, save me from the clay, so that I will not drown. May I not be completely overthrown. What often refutes and confuses me before You is that I am so inclined to fall and so powerless to resist the passions. If it doesn’t reach an agreement, then it’s already hard and unbearable for me that they don’t stop attacking me, and it becomes very shameful for me to live like this in struggle every day. And in this I recognize my weakness, that disgusting dreams invade me so easily and with such difficulty leave me. O mighty God of Israel, Zealot of the souls of the faithful, look at the illnesses and labors of Your servant, and help him in everything he strives for. Strengthen me with heavenly fortress, and let the old man, the poor flesh not yet completely submissive to the spirit, prevail in its possession: I must fight with it as long as my breath lasts in this calamitous life. Alas! What kind of life is here - a life where there is no break in disasters and sorrows, where everything is lined with snares, everything is overflowing with enemies. As soon as one trouble, one temptation goes away, another comes. And the previous struggle has not yet ended, but many other, unexpected battles are already beginning. And how is it possible to love human life when there is so much bitterness in it, so it is subject to misfortunes and disasters? How is it possible to call it life when it gives birth to so much death and so much infection! And yet they love her, and many seek pleasure in her. They often scold this world for being deceptive and vain; but they do not want to leave him, because the lust of the flesh controls the soul. Some things make you love him, others make you despise him. Love for the world is suggested by: “the lust of the flesh, the lust of desire and the pride of life.” But they are followed by troubles and sorrows, and produce hatred of the world and spiritual anguish. But, alas! the spirit, devoted to the world, is overcome by vicious pleasure, and accepts being in sensuality as sweetness, because it has not seen or tasted the sweetness in God and the inner beauty in virtue. But those who completely despise the world and try to live for God in holy obedience are familiar with the divine sweetness promised to the true outcasts of the world, and they see more clearly how seriously the world is mistaken and how variously it is deceived. 1) Ps. 21:5. 2) Ps. 68:15. 4) 1In. 2:16. Chapter 21. That in God our peace is above all blessings and gifts Above all and in everything, my soul, may your peace always be in God, for He is eternal rest for all saints. Grant me, sweetest and most beloved Jesus, to rest in You above every creature, above all prosperity and all beauty, above all honor and greatness, above all power and dignity, above all knowledge and understanding, above all wealth and art, above all joy and admiration, above all glory and honor, above all sweetness and joy, above all hope and promise, above all dignity and desire, above all the gifts and bounties that You can bestow and pour out, above all the joy and celebrations that the spirit can contain and feel - finally, above all the angels and archangels and all the heavenly hosts, above everything visible and invisible, and above everything that is not You, my God! For in You, my God, is perfection above all. You are the One Most High, the One All-Powerful, the One All-Satisfied and All-Abundant, the One All-Sweet and All-Joyful, the One All-Elegant and All-Lovely, the One All-Honest and All-Glorious: above all, in You all the good things are completely perfect and have been and will remain. And for this reason, everything is small for me and everything is incomplete, what You give me besides Yourself and reveal or promise about Yourself, until I see You and reach fullness, and my heart cannot truly be in the world or in complete contentment if it does not rest in You and ascend above all gifts and every creature. Oh, my beloved bridegroom, Christ Jesus, purest love, Ruler of every creature! Who will give me the wings of true freedom, so that I may fly and rest in You? Oh, when will it be given to me to cease, and to understand what sweetness is in You, O Lord my God! When will I gather myself completely in You, so that I don’t feel myself for Your love, but feel You alone, above every feeling and image, in an unknown way! Now I often sigh and carry my misfortune with my illness, for many troubles befall me in this vale of sorrows; They often confuse me with sadness and cover me with clouds, often delay and scatter me, seduce and entangle me, so that I do not have free access to You, to the sweetness of Your embrace, always open to the blessed spirits. May my sighing and all my inconsolability on earth move You. Oh, Jesus, the radiance of eternal glory, joy in the journey of my soul, my face turns to you, and there is no voice in my mouth, and my silence speaks to you. How long will it take my Lord to come? May he come to me, his beggar, and fill him with joy!.. May he send out his hand and snatch the poor from all distress. Come, come - there will not be a joyful day or an hour without You, for You are my joy, and without You my meal is empty. I am unhappy, I am as if imprisoned and bound with chains and heavily shackled, until You raise me up with the light of Your presence, and set me free, and show me Your face again in favor. Let others seek instead of You whatever they please; but I do not desire and will not desire anything except You, my God, my hope, my eternal salvation. I will not remain silent and will not give up prayer until Your grace returns to me, until I hear Your voice within me. “So, I come to you, because you called Me. Your tears and the desire of your soul, your humility and heartfelt contrition bowed Me down and brought Me to you.” And I said: “Lord, I called You and desired Your sweetness, and I am ready to give up everything for You, for You first aroused me, so that I would seek You. Be blessed, O Lord, for you have done goodness to Your servant according to the abundance of Your mercy. And what else will Your servant say before You, unless he humbles himself before You with great humility, always remembering his lawlessness and his weakness and insignificance. For there is no one like You in all the splendor of earth and heaven. Thy deeds are good, O Lord, Thy judgments are just, and by Thy providence everything is governed. Praise and glory to You, O Wisdom of the Father: My lips and my soul and all creation together praise and bless You. 3) Ps. 45:10. 7) Ps. 118:65. Chapter 22. About the remembrance of the many blessings of God Open, O Lord, my heart to Thy law, and teach me to walk in Thy statutes. Grant me to understand Your will, and all Your good deeds together, and especially remember everything with great reverence and diligent meditation, so that I may be able to give praise to You for their sake. But I know and confess that even in the smallest thing I cannot worthily repay the debt of grateful praise. All the blessings bestowed upon me are beyond my measure, and when I rush to Thy glory, my spirit disappears in its majesty. 1 Everything that we have, both in soul and body, and everything external and internal that we possess by nature and beyond nature, are all Your blessings, and everything manifests the merciful and generous Benefactor, from Whom we have received all the benefits. Let one receive more, the other less, but everything comes from You, and without You nothing, not even the least, comes. The one who has received more cannot boast of his dignity, neither exalt himself above others, nor despise the one who has less, for he is greater and better than everyone who ascribes less to himself and who is more humble and reverent in thanksgiving than everyone else; He who considers himself inferior to everyone and thinks to himself that he is more unworthy than everyone else is more worthy than anyone else to receive more. And whoever has received less should not grieve and murmur and envy the rich, but all the more should raise his thoughts to you and praise Your goodness, that You lavish Your bounties so abundantly, and with such love, and so freely and without partiality. Everything comes from You, and for this reason let You be praised in everything. You know what needs to be given to everyone, and why one has less and another has more - it’s not for us to judge, but for You; For You have decreed for everyone what he is worthy of. And for this, Lord God, I consider it a great blessing to myself that I have a little of that from which comes praise and glory in the outer world and among people. And every person, when he looks at his poverty and his humiliation, should not be burdened by this or be sad or despair, but rather be consoled and rejoice greatly; for You, God, have chosen the poor and the humble and the despised of this world to be Your neighbors and household companions. Your Apostles themselves are witnesses to this; they have established princes throughout the whole earth. Their treatment in the world was without grumbling, and they were so humble and simple without any malice or cunning that they joyfully accepted dishonor for Your name, and from which the world turns away with horror, they strove for it with great desire. Whoever loves You and understands Your good deeds, nothing should please him so much as Your will for him and Your good pleasure, ordained from the ages. And Your will should be for him such peace and consolation that he will wish to be the least of all, as another would wish to be more than all, and so he will be peaceful and contented in the last place, as another wants to be in the first, and with such a desire he will remain in contempt and humiliation, without any name, without any glory, as another will be in honor and in worldly greatness. For Your will and the desire for Your glory should be higher than anything else for him, and should console him and delight him more than all the blessings that have been given to him or that can be given. 1) Ps. 44:17, Acts. 5:41. Chapter 23. About four ways to great peace My son, now I will show you the path of true peace and freedom. Do, O Lord, according to Your word! I am glad to hear Your word. Try, My son, to fulfill the will of others rather than your own. Always choose what is less, not what is more. Always look for the lowest place so that you can be behind everyone else. Always wish and pray that God’s will will be completely fulfilled in you. Such a person will enter the land of peace and tranquility. Lord, Your word is short, but it contains great perfection. His speech is not long, but full of reason and abundant in fruit. And if I could have kept that word faithfully, I would not have been embarrassed so quickly. For every time I feel indignant and in a burden, I see that I have departed from this teaching. But You, Who can do everything and are always zealous for the benefit of the soul, multiply Your great grace, so that I will be strong to fulfill Your word and accomplish my salvation. Prayer against evil thoughts Lord my God, do not depart from me, my God, come to my help. Vain thoughts have risen up against me, and great fears are crushing my soul - and how will I get through unharmed? How can I crush them? “I,” he says, “will go before you and humble the proud of the earth. I will open the doors of the prison, and I will reveal the hidden mysteries to you.” Do, O Lord, according to Your word, and let all wicked thoughts flee from Your presence. My only hope and my only consolation is to run to You in every adversity, to believe in You, and from the depths of my heart to cry out to You, and to patiently wait for Your consolation. Prayer for enlightenment of thought Illuminate me, Good Jesus, with the radiance of inner light. Remove all darkness from the abode of my heart. Tame the fermentation of many things and drive out the temptations that rape me. Fight against me with strong warfare and drive out the beasts of prey and my seductive lusts. may there be peace in Thy power, and may much praise thunder forth unto Thy in Thy holy court, in a pure conscience. Ban the winds and storms. Yes, say to the sea: calm down, and to the stormy wind: do not move - and there will be great silence. Send Your light and Your truth, let them shine on the earth: I am an empty and idle land, until You enlighten me. Pour out Your grace from above, fill my heart with heavenly grace. Prepare the waters of tenderness, so that the face of the earth may drink, so that good and perfect fruit may grow. Lift up my thought, oppressed by the burden of sins, and confirm all my desires to the heavenly, so that it will be bitter for me to think about earthly things when I taste the sweetness of the highest bliss. Delight me and tear me away from all transitory consolation in creatures, for nothing created can fully satiate my desire and fully comfort me. Tie me to You with an inextricable union of love, for in You alone the desire of love is fulfilled, and without You everything is in vain. 5) Ps. 70:12. 6) Is. 45:2, 3. 8) Ps. 121:7. 9) Ps. 42:3. Chapter 24. How to Avoid Curious Inquiry into the Life of Your Neighbor My son, do not be curious and leave idle worries. What do you care about this or that? You follow Me. What do you care what this or that person is like, how he speaks, how he acts? You don’t need to answer for others, but you will give the answer for yourself. Why are you confusing yourself? Thus, I understand everyone and see everything that is under the sun, and I know what happens in everyone, what anyone thinks about, what anyone wants, and to what end anyone’s thoughts are directed. So, everything must be left to Me: keep yourself in good peace and leave the fussy to fuss as much as he wants. All his deeds and his words will be returned to him, for he cannot deceive Me. May you not care about great glory, a flickering shadow, nor about close acquaintance with many, nor about the close community of people: for from this all dispersion and great darkness in the heart are born. I would love to tell you My word, and would reveal my secret things, when you diligently wait on guard for My coming, and would open the doors of your heart to Me. Be sober and sober in your prayers, and humble yourself in everything. 1) In. 20:22. Rome. 16:12. 2) 1Pet. 4:7. Chapter 25. What does strong peace of heart and true improvement consist of? My son, I said: “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives, I give to you. Everyone desires peace, but not everyone cares about what belongs to true peace. My peace be with the humble and meek in heart. Peace be with you in many ways. When you listen to Me and follow My voice, you can taste the great peace.” How should I act, Lord, in every matter? Watch yourself, what you do and what you say, and direct all your intentions towards being pleasing to Me alone, and not wanting anything and not looking for anything other than Me. But don’t judge other people’s words or deeds boldly, don’t get yourself involved in matters not entrusted to you, and you can get to the point where you are little or rarely embarrassed. And never to feel any embarrassment, and not to endure any burden of heart or body, is impossible in the present age, but it will be so in a state of eternal peace. Do not think that you have found true peace when you do not feel any burden, that it is completely good for you when you do not tolerate hostility from anyone, that you have achieved perfection when everything happens to you according to your desire. And do not dream that there is anything great in you or that you are especially in the love of God when you feel in great reverence or in great sweetness; for this is not where a true lover of virtue is recognized, and this is not where perfection and perfection for a person lie. The fact that you sacrifice yourself with all your heart to the will of God and do not ask what is yours - neither in small nor in great, neither in time nor in eternity, so that you always, in prosperity and in misfortune, remain in grateful praise, without changing your face and measuring everything by the same measure. If even at that hour when inner consolation is taken away from you, you will be so firm and long-suffering in the hope that you will begin to prepare your heart for new patience, even harder than before: if you begin to justify yourself. that you suffer unworthily, and you will justify Me and praise Me in all My destinies about you: then you will enter the true and right path of the world, and you will undoubtedly have hope that you will again see My face in joy. And when you reach complete contempt for yourself, know that you are tasting all the abundance of peace that is possible in your earthly life. Chapter 26. About the superiority of the free spirit, which can be achieved rather by humble prayer than by reading 1 Lord, this is the work of a perfect man, to never weaken in spirit in striving for heavenly things, and to pass through the midst of many worries as if having no worries, not for the sake of laziness, but primarily of a free spirit, not clinging to a single creation with disordered love. 2. I pray to You, All-Good Lord my God, keep me from the worries of this world, so that they do not entangle me too much, from the multitude of bodily needs, so that the passion for pleasure does not take possession of me, - from all spiritual misfortunes, so that troubles do not break me to the point of despair. I do not pray to get rid of that to which all the desires of human vanity are directed, but from the disastrous needs of mortal nature, struck by a general curse; they lie like a punishment and a heavy burden on the soul of Your servant and hold the soul and, no matter how much it desires, do not allow it to enter the freedom of the spirit. Oh, my God, inexpressible sweetness, turn all carnal consolation into bitterness for me, when it takes me away from love for the eternal and flatteringly attracts me to itself with the sweet appearance of real good. May my God not overcome me, may flesh and blood not overcome me, may the world and its short glory not deceive me, may the devil and his wickedness not overcome me. Grant me to resist with strength, to endure with patience, and to maintain constancy. Grant instead of all worldly consolations the sweetest anointing of Your spirit, and instead of carnal love, pour love for Your name into me. And food and drink and clothing, and everything else that serves the needs of maintaining bodily strength - everything is burdensome to the flaming spirit. Grant me to use these earthly blessings in moderation, so that I am not entangled by excess of desires. It is impossible to reject everything, because nature must be maintained; but holy law prohibits demanding unnecessary things and that which serves more for pleasure; for otherwise the flesh would strengthen itself against the spirit. In the midst of all this, I pray that Thy hand will guide me and guide me, so that I will not end up in excess in anything. Chapter 27. About the fact that one’s own love most distances one from the supreme good My son, you need to give all of yourself for everything, and not leave anything of your own for yourself. Know that self-love harms you more than anything else in this world. According to the amount of love and desire that you contain within yourself, every thing is more or less attached to you. If your love were pure and simple and decent, you would not be captivated by worldly things. Do not desire what you should not have: do not have what can complicate you and deprive you of inner freedom. It’s amazing that you, from the depths of your heart, will not betray yourself to me with everything you could want or have. Why are you tormenting yourself with needless sadness? Why do you tire yourself with unnecessary worries? Rely on My will, and you will not suffer any harm. If you are looking for this or that, and want to be in this or that place, for your own benefit, so that your most important desire is fulfilled, you will never be at peace, you will never be free from worries, because in every thing there will be something insufficient and in every place someone will turn out to be an opponent. So, it is not what a person has received or what has increased in him in external things that serves him for his benefit, but rather what he has despised and cut off from his heart by the roots. And understand this not only about the inclination for money and wealth, but also about the desire for honors and the desire for vain glory: all this passes away with the world. The place will not be a reliable fence when there is no ardor in the spirit, and for a short time there will be peace acquired from without, if the heart does not stand on a true foundation, that is, if you do not become in Me. You can change, but you cannot make yourself better: for when an opportunity arises and you succumb to it, you will again find what you were running away from, and even more. Prayer for purification of the heart and for heavenly wisdom Strengthen me, O God, with the grace of the Holy Spirit. Grant me the strength to strengthen myself in the inner man, and to empty my heart of all useless care and sorrow; and not to be carried away by desire in different directions for every low and precious thing, to understand in all things that everything passes and I myself will pass along with them: for there is nothing that remains under the sun, and everything is vanity and the will of the spirit. Oh, what wisdom there is in that, someone understands! Grant me, Lord, heavenly wisdom, so that I may learn to seek and find You above all else, to desire and love above all else, and to understand everything else as it is, in the order of Your wisdom. Grant us the gift of prudently rejecting the flatterer and patiently enduring the adversary, for there is great wisdom in this - not to be swayed by every wind of verbal speech, and not to incline your ear to a flattering verb. So, continuing the path you started, you will pass it safely. Chapter 28. Against the language of slanderers 1. My son, do not be upset if someone thinks badly of you and speaks badly of you, which you do not like to hear. You should think even worse about yourself and not consider anyone below you. If you ascend within yourself and walk like this, you will not consider external, transitory speech as great. There is considerable prudence in one who remains silent in evil times and turns to Me inwardly and is not embarrassed by human judgment. 2. Let not your peace be in the mouth of men; No matter how people judge whether it’s bad or good, you won’t become a different person. Where is true peace and true glory? Is it not in Me? And whoever does not seek to please people and is not afraid of being displeasing to them will enjoy the great world. From disorderly love and from vain fear will be born all kinds of anxiety in the heart and confusion in the feelings. Chapter 29. How to call on God during temptation 1. May Thy name be blessed forever, O Lord, that Thou hast destined this present temptation and misfortune to come upon me. I cannot avoid it, but I need to resort to You, may you help me and turn me for good. Lord, I have come to attack me, and there is no joy for my heart, but real passion torments me deeply. And now what is the river, Beloved Father? I am in distress from everywhere - save me from this hour - but for this sake I have come to this hour, so that You will be glorified when I humble myself to the end and will be freed by You. May Your will be done, O Lord, for my deliverance: what can I, a poor man, and where will I go without You? Grant me, Lord, patience this time too. Help me, my God, and I will not be afraid, no matter how hard it may be for me. 2. And now, in my distress, what river? Lord, Thy will be done. I am truly worthy of my misfortune and hardship, and for this I must endure everything, as long as I am patient! - until the storm passes and the best time comes. But Your almighty hand can take away this present temptation from me and subdue its desire, so that I will not be overthrown. You have often done this with me before. My God, my mercy. And the more difficult it is for me, the easier it is for You to betray the right hand of the Most High. 1) In. 12:27, 28. 2) Matt. 26: 42. Ps. 58:18. Ps. 76:11. Chapter 30. About asking for God's help and about faith in the return of His grace My son. I am God who is good to those who endure Him in the day of trouble. Come to Me in your time of sorrow. This is why heavenly consolation is so slow that you turn to prayer too late: and before you begin to earnestly ask Me, meanwhile you are looking for many consolations, and you are strengthening yourself from the outside. This is why it happens that everything helps you little, until you understand that I deliver those who trust in Me, and besides Me there is no strong help and good advice and reliable means. “Now, having risen in spirit after the storm, renew your strength in the light of My mercy, for I am near,” says the Lord, “that I may restore everything, and restore it to what it was before, and make it abundant and abundant.” Is there something difficult for Me, or am I like one who speaks and does not do? Where is your faith? Stand firm and motionless; be patient with courage: consolation will come to you in its time. Wait for Me, wait: I will come and heal you. What torments you is temptation, and what terrifies you is vain fear. Why worry about the future, what might happen to you - is it just to add sadness to sadness? His anger will prevail throughout the day. It is vain and useless to be embarrassed or rejoice about what is still in the future, when it may not happen at all. But it is human business to deceive oneself with such a dream, and one is clearly still cowardly who is so easily carried away by the enemy’s suggestions. The enemy doesn’t care how he seduces and deceives, with truth or lies, or with what he depresses - whether through desire for the present or fear for the future. Let not your heart be troubled, nor be afraid. Believe in Me and rely on My mercy. When you think that you are far away from Me, often at that very time I am closer to you. When you think that you are completely lost, it is often then that the time comes to acquire great wealth. All is not lost because something bad happened to you. You should not judge by the suggestion of a real feeling, and no matter where the burden comes to you, you should not dwell on it and succumb to it as if all hope of deliverance had disappeared. Do not think that you are completely abandoned, although I allowed you to be in sorrow for a while or took away the desired consolation from you: for this is how the path to the kingdom of heaven is completed. It undoubtedly serves you and My other servants better to be tested than to have everything according to your desire. I know secret thoughts - I know how it is necessary for your salvation to leave you for a while in the dryness of your soul, so that you do not become proud of your good success, and do not want to please yourself in what is not in you. What I have given, I can take away and return according to My will. What I have given remains Mine; When I took something back, I took it away from you that was not yours, for every gift is good and every gift is Mine, and every gift is perfect. If I send you some kind of burden or opposition, do not complain and do not let your heart become sad: I can suddenly lighten it and change all your burdens into joy. And in all that I do with you, I am truly righteous and great praise is due to Me. If you reason correctly and think according to the truth, you should never grieve to the point of such despair about your misfortunes, but rather rejoice and give praise - and also count it as your only joy that, having begun, I never cease to hurt you. “For the Father loves Me, and I will love you,” I said to My beloved disciples. And I did not send them for temporary joys, but for great warfare; not for honor, but for humiliation; not for celebration, but for labor: not for rest, but let them produce much fruit in patience. Remember these words, my son. 1) Nahum. 1:7, 2 ) M f. 4:34, 5) James. 1: 17. 6) Job. 6:10, John 15:9. Chapter 31. About disdain for every creature in order to find the Creator Lord, I need deep grace when I have to reach there, where no one and no creature can detain me. As long as anything is still holding me back, I cannot soar freely towards You. The one who said: “Whoever gives me a krill like a dove and I will fly and rest in peace” wanted to soar freely. The calmest thing in the world is the simple eye, and the freest is the one who desires nothing on earth. So, you must rise above every creature, completely leave yourself and become with your whole mind outside yourself, and see that You, the Creator of all things, have nothing like creatures. No one can freely strive in spirit towards the heavenly if he does not renounce all created things; and that is why there are not many contemplative people, for few know how to completely remove themselves from corruptible creatures. Great grace is needed to lift up the soul and delight it above itself. And if a person does not ascend in spirit, and, having freed himself from all creatures, does not completely unite with God, everything will be of little importance, no matter what he knows and no matter what he has. To whom anything else seems great, except for the one, immense eternal good, he will remain in poverty for a long time and defeated. Everything that is not God is nothing, and must be imputed to nothing. Truly there is a great difference between the wisdom of an enlightened and reverent man, and between the knowledge of a learned and skilled man in the Scriptures. The teaching that flows from above from Divine inspiration is much superior to that which is acquired by the labor of the human mind. Many people desire contemplation, but do not try to practice what is necessary for contemplation. And there is a great obstacle to this, that people stop at rituals and sensual things and care little about the complete mortification. I don’t know what is in us, and in what spirit we walk and what we want to achieve, bearing the name of spiritual people: but we use so much labor and great effort on the insignificant and perishable, and rarely do we think about our inner self with complete attention. And we barely have time to gather our thoughts before we immediately rush again to the external, and do not examine our deeds with a strict test. We don’t think about where our desires lie, we don’t cry about how unclean everything is in us. And when all flesh had spread its bonds upon the earth, then the great flood came. And when our inner impulses are greatly corrupted, then the impulse will certainly be followed by a depraved act, and it will be revealed that we have no inner strength. From a pure heart comes the fruit of a good life. They want to know who did what; but they do not analyze with such attention the force from which the matter occurs. They investigate whether someone is strong, whether someone is rich, whether someone is handsome, whether he is skilled, whether someone writes well, whether he sings well, whether he is diligent in his work: but whether a person is poor in spirit, whether he is patient and meek, whether he is reverent, whether he is spiritual - many are silent about this. Nature looks at the external in man; grace turns to the inner. Nature is often deceived, but grace trusts in God so that there is no deception. 1) Ps. 54:7. 4) Gen. 6:22. Chapter 32. About renunciation of oneself and about the abandonment of all lust My son, you cannot completely enter freedom unless you completely renounce yourself. All owners and self-lovers are bound by bonds: whimsical, inquisitive, idle, who always seek what is curious and pleasant, and not what is about Christ Jesus. Everything that they invent and compose for themselves will not stand, for what did not come from God will completely perish. Hold fast to this short and perfect word: “leave everything and you will gain everything; give up lust and find peace.” Reflect on this word in your mind, and when you begin to fulfill it, then you will understand everything. Lord, this is not a day’s work and not a child’s game: in this short word lies the entire perfection of spiritual people. My son, when you hear about the path of the perfect, you should not turn away from it or immediately become despondent: on the contrary, having heard it, you should strive even more strongly to the highest, or at least turn your heartfelt sighs there. Oh, if only this would happen to you, and you would reach the point where you would not love yourself, and become in everything not My will and the will of the mentor whom I have placed over you. Then you would be very pleasing to Me, and your whole life would pass in joy and peace. There is still much that you need to leave behind, and if you do not renounce all this for Me, you will not receive what you ask for. I command you to buy from Me gold kindled by fire, so that you may become rich—that is, to buy heavenly wisdom, which tramples on everything below. Put aside all earthly wisdom, both human and your own pleasure. My word to you: “Take what is low and give for it what is considered precious and high in human affairs. For true heavenly wisdom is considered insignificant and poor, and is almost completely forgotten among people; - She does not think highly of herself, does not seek to be proud on earth, and many only preach it with their lips, but in life they deviate far from it. And she is a valuable bead, hidden from many.” Chapter 33. About the impermanence of the heart and the fact that one must place one’s final intention in God My son, do not believe your heart’s disposition: it is one today, but will soon change to another. As long as you live, you will be subject to change, even against your will: you will be now in joy, now in sadness, now in peace, now in confusion, now in reverence, now in indifference, now in diligence, now in laziness, now in strict thought, now in frivolity. But above all change stands the wise and experienced in spirit; He does not care about how he feels within himself or in which direction the variable wind is blowing, but about striving with all his soul and all his thought towards the due and desired end. If only he could, in the midst of all sorts of events, remain the same person, motionless, continuously directing his mental eye to Me in simplicity. And the cleaner the mental eye is, the more reliable you will be through various storms. But the eye of pure intention is often darkened, for it gazes at everything delightful that it encounters. It is rare to find a person who would not seek his own and would be completely free from this vice. So once upon a time the Jews went to Bethany to Martha and Mary, not only for Jesus’ sake, but also to see Lazarus.” So, it is necessary to cleanse the eye of intention, so that it will be simple and direct and, bypassing everything that exists in the environment, may it turn to Me. Chapter 34. He who loves God delights in God above all else and in everything. Behold my God and all that is mine is in Him! What do I want more and what other bliss do I want? Oh, desired and sweet word - but for those who love the Word, and not the world, nor I, are the essence of the world. My God and my everything is in Him. To him who understands this word is sufficient; and whoever loves will hear it in sweetness again and again. When You are present, everything is sweet; when You are not there, everything is hateful. You give the heart tranquility and great peace and celebratory joy, You grant to rejoice in everything and praise You in everything, and without You nothing can be pleasant for a long time. But if anything needs to be joyful and sweet, there must be Thy grace and there must be a dissolution of Thy wisdom. To whom are You a sweet, that which will not be sweet? And who does not understand Your sweetness, what can truly be pleasant? But the wise ones faint in Thy wisdom, who of this age and of the flesh eat for their own sweetness: for in their wisdom is much vanity, and death in their eating. And whoever follows You in contempt of worldly things and in mortification of the flesh, those are truly wise, for from vanity they ascend to truth and from flesh to spirit. They taste God in sweetness: and whatever good they find in creatures, they all attribute to the praise of their Creator. But there is a great difference - to enjoy the Creator or creation, eternity or time, the uncreated Light or the heavenly body. Oh, Infinite Light, above all the luminaries of the whole creation! Flash lightning from above and let it penetrate into the entire depth of my heart. Cleanse, rejoice, illuminate and revive my spirit and all its powers, and may it dwell with you in joyful delight. Oh, when will that blessed and longed-for hour come when You will saturate me with Your presence and be all in all to me? Until I accept this gift, I will not have complete joy. Still woe to me - the old man lives in me, he is not all crucified, he is not completely dead, he still lusts against the spirit with a strong desire, he still raises internal battles, and the kingdom of my soul does not leave me alone. 4. But You, the Lord of the sea. and the indignation of his waves, arise. come to my help. kindle the tongues that move to fight, wipe them out with Your power. Reveal Your greatness and may Your right hand be glorified; for I have no other hope and no other refuge except You, O Lord my God. 1) 1Jn. 2:15. 4) Ps. 88:10. 42:26. 47:32. Chapter 35. About the fact that there is no safety from temptations in this life My son, you will never be safe in this life, but while you are alive, you always need spiritual weapons. You live among enemies, and they fight you from right and left. When your shield of patience is not ready from everywhere, you will not be safe from the ulcer for long. And moreover, when you do not establish your heart in Me, truly desiring to endure everything for My sake, you cannot endure the wrath of battle and will not receive the crown of bliss. And for this you must go through everything with courage, and with a powerful hand strive against everything that is opposed. For to the one who overcomes, manna will be given to eat, but the faint-hearted will be left in great poverty. When you seek peace in this life, how will you achieve eternal peace? Prepare yourself not for much peace, but for much patience. Seek true peace not on earth, but in heaven, not in people and not in all other creation, but in the One God. For the sake of love for God, you must endure everything joyfully - labors and sorrows, temptations and embarrassments, cramped conditions and need, illnesses, insults, slander, reproaches, humiliation, shame, reproof and contempt. All this contributes to virtue, all tests the disciple of Christ, all creates a heavenly crown. I will give eternal reward for short labor and endless glory for temporary humiliation. Don't you think? that spiritual consolations will remain with you for a long time at your will? And My saints did not possess them like that: they had many disasters, all kinds of temptations and great sorrows. But they remained patient in everything and trusted more in God. than they relied on themselves, knowing that they were unworthy of the passions of the present time for the glory that wants to appear in us. And you want to immediately acquire what many have barely achieved after many tears and after great labors! Wait for the Lord, act courageously and be strong courageously: do not put aside your hope, do not give up, but constantly lay down your body and soul for the glory of God. I will repay you abundantly. I will be with you in every tribulation. 1) Apoc. 2:17. 3) Rome. 8:18. Chapter 36. Against the vain judgments of men My son, establish your heart in the Lord and do not be afraid of human judgment when your conscience testifies that you are pious and innocent. Whoever suffers from this, such patience is good and blessed, and it will not be hard for a humble heart when it trusts in God and does not rely on itself. Many people like to talk a lot, and therefore there is no need to give them much faith: and it is impossible to please everyone. Paul tried to be pleasing to everyone in the Lord and became everything to everyone; however, he cared little about the fact that he would be judged at the human court. He worked quite hard for the edification and salvation of people - as much as he could and as much strength as he had in him; but he could not forbid that people sometimes judge him or despise him. And for this purpose he placed everything on God the Omniscient, and with patience and humility defended himself against those who speak iniquity, against those who think vain and worldly things, and frivolously repeat all sorts of speeches. Sometimes, however, he answered, so that the weak would not be tempted by his silence. Who are you that you are afraid of mortal man? Today he is alive, but tomorrow you will not see him. Fear God - then you will not be afraid of fear from people. What can anyone do to you? He will harm himself more with words or insults than you. And he cannot escape God’s judgment, no matter who he is. Have God before your eyes, and do not object with words of argument. And if now it seems. that you are completely falling and suffering humiliation through no fault of your own, do not become irritated by this, and do not diminish the value of your crown with impatience, but rather raise your eyes to Me in heaven: I am able to deliver you from all humiliation and insult, and to reward each according to his deeds. 2) Ps. 51:12. Rome. 2:6. Chapter 37. About pure and perfect renunciation of oneself to achieve heart freedom My son, leave yourself and find Me. Don’t choose for yourself, don’t have your own - and you will always be rich. And greater grace will be added to you as soon as you deny yourself and do not turn back. Lord, how many times should I deny myself, and what should I leave myself with? Always and at every hour: both in small and in great. I won’t take anything away, but I want you to appear completely naked in everything. How can you be Mine and I be yours, when you do not remove from yourself, both internally and externally, all your own will? The sooner you fulfill it, the better it will be for you, the more perfect and sincere you are, the more you will please Me and the richer you will become. Others renounce themselves, but as if with an exception: their trust in God is not complete, and that is why they still worry about how to arrange their affairs. Others at first give themselves completely, but later, when temptation comes, they return to themselves, and therefore do not succeed in virtue. Such people will not achieve true freedom of a pure heart and will not enter into the grace of joyful fellowship with Me. They must first completely deny themselves and daily sacrifice themselves to Me: without this, the union with Me will not be conceived and become living and effective. Now I say my much-spoken word to you again: leave yourself, renounce yourself, and you will enjoy great inner peace. Give everything for everything; do not look for anything, do not return anything back to yourself; stand in Me with a pure and motionless thought, and I will be yours. You will be free in your heart and darkness will not embrace you. Direct your intention, your prayer, all your desire towards this, so that you can divest yourself of all property and, naked from everything, follow the naked Jesus, die to yourself and live forever for Me. Then all empty dreams, all unholy confusion of thought, all unnecessary care will disappear. Then excessive fear will recede, and disordered love will die in you. Chapter 38. About good behavior in external affairs and about taking refuge in God in dangers My son, you must diligently strive to ensure that in every place, no matter what business or external occupation you have, you are internally free and in your own power: so that you have everything - and not you are in subjection to everything; so that you may be the master and ruler of your affairs, and not a slave or hireling. Be truly the redeemed Israel, going forth into the inheritance and freedom of the sons of God - those who stand above the present and think about the eternal, with their left eye looking at the transitory, and with their right at the heavenly; They are not carried away to the point of attachment to temporary goods, but they themselves attract every thing to the good service for which God has ordained and established it. The Supreme Creator did not leave anything unsettled in His creation. If in every matter you do not stop at appearances and do not look at the visible or audible with just your physical eyes, but with every action you first of all enter, like Moses, into the sanctuary of the canopy to ask the Lord: then from time to time you will hear the divine answer, and then you will come out with much instruction both about the present and about the future. Moses always resorted to the sanctuary when it was necessary to resolve perplexities and questions, and sought in prayer help and relief from dangers and from human wickedness. So you must flee to the secret church of your heart and there pray intensely for Divine help. That is why, as the Scripture reads, Joshua and the sons of Israel were deceived by the Gibeonites because they were not in a hurry to first of all question the Lord, but gullibly listened to flattering speeches and allowed themselves to be deceived by false compassion. Chapter 39. A person should not be impatient in his affairs My son, always submit your work to My will: I will arrange good things in My time. Wait for My determination, and you will see that your patience will be for your good. Lord, I joyfully submit every matter to Your will, for my thoughts will serve me little good. Oh, if only I could stop worrying so much about future events! Whenever I would be ready to surrender myself in everything to Your good pleasure! My son, it often happens that a person worries a lot about what he wants; but when he achieves what he wanted, he begins to change in his feelings: for our feelings are fickle, but more often they carry us away to one thing or another. So, it’s no small matter to deny yourself even in the most unimportant things. True improvement for a person is renunciation of himself, and a renounced person is completely free and safe. But the ancient enemy raises a war against all good people, and does not cease to tempt a person: day and night he builds a disastrous ambush, waiting, as if by deception, to catch the unwary in his net. “Watch and pray,” says the Lord, “so that you do not fall into misfortune.” Chapter 40. Man in himself has nothing good and should not boast of anything. Lord, what is man, that you remember him, or the son of man, that you visit him? What has man done to deserve that You should grant him Your grace? Lord, how can I grumble when You leave me? And what can I really complain about when you don’t do what I ask? The word will be true in my heart and in my mouth when I say: Lord, I am nothing, I can do nothing and there is nothing good in me, but in everything I am powerless and always strive for insignificance. And when there is no help or inner guidance from You, I completely cool down and become relaxed. But You, Lord, are always the same and remain forever, ever Good and Righteous and Holy, You create all that is good and righteous and holy and arrange it in wisdom. But I am more inclined to decrease than to increase, and therefore I do not always remain in one state, but seven times will change over me. However, I immediately change for the better when You deign and extend Your merciful hand to me. For You alone, without human help, can restore and strengthen me so much that my face no longer changes here and there; but in You alone my heart would turn and rest. If only I knew how to reject all human consolation, if only for this reason. to gain reverence, or for the sake of my need, that I have no consolation from a single person and I need to look for You! - then in truth I could strengthen my hope in Your grace, and rejoice with all my soul in the gift of new consolation. And in whatever good success I have, thanks to You for everything; everything comes from Him. But I am vanity and nothing before You, I am a fickle and powerless person: what can I be famous for, or what will I want to honor for myself? Is it that I am nothing, but to boast about this is vanity more than any vanity! Vain glory is truly an evil plague, vanity of vanities, for it distracts from true glory and deprives one of heavenly grace. When a person pleases himself, he does not please You; when he thirsts for human praise, he is deprived of heavenly virtue. But in This is true glory and holy exaltation, to boast not about oneself, but about You, to rejoice in Your name, and not about one’s own virtue, and not to delight in any creature, unless for Your sake. Let your name, and not mine, be glorified; Let your work, and not mine, be magnified; may your holy name be blessed. Let nothing touch me from human praise. You are my glory, You are the joy of my heart. I will praise and rejoice in You all day long, but in myself I will boast in nothing except about my weaknesses. 5. Let the Jews seek glory, accepting glory from each other: but I will seek that glory that is from the one God. And all human glory, all temporal honor, all worldly heights - all, when compared with Your eternal glory, is vanity and madness. Oh, my Truth and my Mercy, my God, the all-blessed Trinity. To You alone be praise and strength and honor and glory forever and ever. 1) Ps. 8: 5. 2) Dan. 4: 13. 5 ) 2 Cor. 12:5. Chapter 41. About the contempt of all temporary honor 1. My son, do not apply your heart when you see that others are magnified and exalted, while you are in oblivion and humiliation. Raise your heart to Me in heaven, and the contempt of man on earth will not sadden you. 2. Lord, we walk in blindness and are quickly deceived by vanity. When I look at myself in truth, I see that I have never had an unjust offense from any of Your creations, and I have no one to truly grumble against before You. But I have often and gravely sinned against You, and for this reason every creature righteously rises up against me. All reproach and contempt are worthy and righteous for me. To you is due praise and honor and power and glory. And when I am not ready for my own will to be despised and forgotten by every creature, and to be considered nothing by everyone, it will be impossible for me to reconcile and establish myself within myself, and be enlightened in spirit and completely unite with You. Chapter 42. About the fact that one should not place one’s peace in people 1. My son, when you place your peace in this, so that you can feel at one with this or that person according to your desire or live together, you will be in inconstancy and in confusion. But when your refuge is in the ever-living and abiding Truth, your friend will not sadden you either in separation or in death. Friendly love must be established in Me, and for My sake you must love the one who seemed kind to you and became dearer to you than others in this life. Without Me, no friendship is strong and cannot stand, and that love is not true and pure, which I do not bind. In your feelings for your beloved people, you must die to yourself, so that in everything that belongs to you, you want to be without human society. The more a person approaches God, the further he retreats from all earthly consolation. And the higher he ascends to God, the deeper he descends into himself, and the more he humbles himself before himself. 2. And whoever appropriates something good to himself closes the entrance to God’s grace, for the grace of the Holy Spirit always seeks a humble heart. If you were able to completely destroy yourself and abolish yourself from all created love, then it would be fitting for Me to pour out into you with great grace; as soon as you begin to look at created creatures, the image of the Creator recedes from your gaze. Learn to conquer yourself in everything for the sake of the Creator: then you will be strong to achieve divine knowledge. Even if there is love in moderation, when it loves and looks disorderly, it distances one from the supreme good and brings harm to the soul. Chapter 43. Against the vain knowledge of this age My son, do not be captivated by the beauty and subtlety of human words. For the kingdom of God is not in words, but in power. Listen to My words: My word ignites hearts and enlightens minds, brings tenderness and brings much consolation. Never read a word so that people think you are a scientist or a wise person; but learn to mortify the vices in yourself: this will serve you better than studying many difficult questions. No matter how much you read, no matter how much you study, you must return to a single beginning. I teach man knowledge, and I give to infants a bright understanding, which human science cannot give. To whom I speak, he will soon become wise and prosper greatly in spirit. Woe to those who seek curious knowledge from men and care little about the path of My service. The time will come when teachers, the Teacher Christ and the Lord of Angels, will appear to listen to lessons from everyone and test everyone’s conscience. Then he will search out Jerusalem with a lamp, and what is hidden in darkness will be revealed, and the quarreling of tongues will be silenced. It is in My power to elevate a humble thought in an instant, and it will comprehend the eternal truth in the mind, as it is impossible to comprehend in a human school and in ten years of science. I teach without noise of words, without confusion of opinions, without pomp of praise, without competition of bickering! I teach you to despise earthly things, to turn away from the present, to seek the eternal, to think about the eternal with sweetness, to avoid honors, to endure temptations, to place all your trust in Me, to desire nothing but Me, and above all else to ardently love Me. Someone, having loved Me to the depths, learned the Divine and spoke wondrous verbs: he left everything and gained more from it than from all the subtleties of science. But to some I proclaim what is accessible to everyone, to others I especially say: to some I appear sweetly in signs and images, and to others I reveal many mysteries in the light. One book speech is for everyone, but does not teach everyone in the same way: for within everyone I am the Teacher of truth, the Tester of the heart; I understand thoughts, I elevate them into actions, I distribute gifts to everyone by My judgment, according to the dignity of each. 1) 1 Cor. 4:20. 2) Soph. 1:12. Chapter 44. About what should not attract oneself My son, you need to be ignorant of many things and consider yourself as if dead on earth, as if the whole world had been crucified for you. And you still need to let a lot of things pass by, muffling your ears, and think more about what pertains to your world. It’s better to turn your eyes away from what you don’t like, leave everyone to feel their own way: it will be more useful than toiling in arguments. If you stand firmly with God and look to His judgment, you will more easily endure defeat. Oh, Lord, what have we come to? We mourn temporary misfortune, we chase and work for a small profit, but we forgot to think about spiritual death, unless we remember at a later time. What is of little or no use, we take care of, and what is most needed, we neglect. The whole person has become blurred in the outside world and will willingly be completely immersed in it if he does not hurry to come to his senses. Chapter 45. About what everyone shouldn’t believe, and how easy it is for a person to fall in words Give me help, Lord, from sorrow, for human salvation is vain. How many times have I failed to find faith where I was completely sure! How many times have I found her there, where I least thought of finding her! It is evident that trust in men is vain, but the salvation of the righteous is in You, Lord. Blessed are you, Lord God, in everything that happens to us. We are weak and fickle, and soon we fall and change. Where is the person who could so prudently and prudently protect himself in everything, so as not to sometimes fall into seduction or embarrassment? But whoever trusts in You, Lord, and seeks You with a simple heart, does not fall so easily. And if he falls into temptation, no matter how entangled in it, he will soon be freed by You or will receive consolation from You: for You will not abandon those who trust in You to the end. Rarely does anyone have a true friend who would remain faithful to his friend in all kinds of adversity. You, Lord, You alone are faithful to the end in all things, and there is no other friend except You. Oh, what wisdom the holy soul was filled with when she said: “My thought was established and became in Christ.” If the same had happened to me, I would not have been so quickly overcome by human fear, and the arrows of human words would not have outraged me. Who is able to foresee everything, who can foresee every future misfortune? I expected trouble, and it’s hard when trouble comes; and if the misfortune is unexpected, how can it not be serious? But why didn’t I, unfortunate one, know how to take measures in advance? Why did you trust people so easily? What to do: - we are people, nothing more than mortal people, although many consider us to be angels, they call us angels. Who will I trust, Lord? Who will I trust, is it You? You are the Truth, there is no flattery in it, and there cannot be. And on the contrary, every person is a lie, everyone is weak and fickle and falls, and most of all falls in words; The word seems to have been spoken straight to the face: and one should hardly believe it right away. How wise is Thy instruction, that one must guard oneself from men, and that a man’s enemies are within his own household, and that one should not believe when someone says: here or in another place. Trouble taught me, and if only I could look ahead to myself more and not be unreasonable! “Look,” the man told me, “beware, keep to yourself what I tell you.” And while I remain silent and believe in his secret, he himself is unable to remain silent about what he asked for silence, but he immediately betrays me and himself and leaves. Deliver me from such foolish and frivolous people, O Lord, so that I may not fall into their hands, and in such matters may I not be like them. But put a true and sure word in my mouth, and remove the evil tongue from me. What I don’t want to tolerate, I must avoid in every possible way. Oh, what a good and peaceful thing it is to remain silent about others, not to immediately believe everything, and not to further divulge what you yourself have heard: to reveal yourself to a few, and to seek You in everything, the Knower of the Heart; not to be carried about by every wind of human words, but in everything, both internal and external, to desire that it be done according to the good will of Your will. It is safest to avoid external human glory, in order to preserve heavenly grace, and not to pursue what can arouse surprise in people; but with all zeal to strive for that from which comes the correction of life and spiritual zeal. How many people have been harmed by their virtue by showing up and soon accepting praise for themselves! How grace has served many for the good of success, who have preserved it in silence in this mortal life, which is reputed to be temptation and struggle. 1) Ps. 54:13. 2) Ps. 10:1. 3) Rome. 3:4. Matt. 10:17.36; 24:23. Chapter 46. About the need to have trust in God when the arrows of human words rise My son, stand firm and trust in Me. What is glory - if not just words? They fly through the air, but do not harm the stone. If you are guilty, think that you yourself would like to wish to correct yourself; If you don’t know anything about yourself, consider that you willingly want to endure for the sake of God. Sometimes it’s not enough for you to endure a word, when at other times the punishment seems unbearable to you. And isn’t it because you take such a small thing to heart because you yourself are still entirely in the flesh, and you look at people more than necessary? That’s why you’re afraid of neglect, that’s why you don’t want your wrongdoings noticed, and you’re looking for ghosts of apology. But look at yourself more carefully, and you will find out that the world is still alive in you and the vain desire to please people is alive. And if you run from humiliation and from exposure of shortcomings, it is obvious that you do not have true humility, and you did not truly die to the world and the world did not fall apart for you. But listen to My words, and you will not listen lower to tens of thousands of human words. When everything was said against you that only the strongest malice could invent, what harm would it do to you if you let everything pass you by and take it for nothing? Will this make even one hair fall off? But whoever does not keep his heart inside and does not have God before his eyes is easily and quickly indignant at the word of blasphemy. But whoever trusts in Me and is not inclined to rely on his own judgment will not be under human fear. I am the Judge and Knower of all that is hidden, I know how every event happened, I know who offended and who suffered the offense. From Me comes the word that was spoken, it happened by My will, so that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed. I will judge between the guilty and the innocent; but first I wanted to test both of them with My hidden Judgment. Human testimony often changes: My judgment is true: it will stand and not be ruined. He is most often hidden and appears to few in full; but he is never mistaken, and cannot be mistaken, even if he appears to be wrong in the eyes of men. And for this reason, one should resort to Me in every judgment, and not rely on one’s own reasoning: the righteous will not be embarrassed, no matter what happens to him from God. Even if people condemned him unjustly, he will not worry much; but he will not be exalted in vain when others justify him with reason. He knows that I test hearts and bellies, I do not judge with partiality and not according to human appearances: and often in My eyes it appears criminal, which in human judgment seems praiseworthy. Lord God, Righteous and Mighty and Long-suffering Judge, You know the frailty and malice of man: be in You my strength and all my hope, for my conscience is not enough for me. You know everything that I don't know. and for this I must humble myself in all reproofs and endure everything with meekness. Forgive me mercifully when I did wrong. and grant me again the grace of perfect patience. It is better for me to seek forgiveness for myself in Your abundant mercy than to defend my innermost conscience with my imaginary righteousness. Even if I have nothing to say about myself, I will not be justified about it, and if You take away Your mercy, no one living will be justified before You. 4) Luke. 2:35. 4) Ps. 12:7. Ps. 7:10. 5) Ps. 7:12, 1 Cor. 4:4. Ps. 142:2. Chapter 47. About the fact that all kinds of troubles must be endured for the sake of eternal life My son, do not be distressed by My labors for the sake of those you have received, and do not allow yourself to become despondent from disasters; but in everything that happens to you, may My promise be your strength and comfort. I am able to repay you above all measure and all limit. You won’t work here for long, and you won’t always be burdened with sorrows. Wait a little, and you will soon see the end of your troubles. In one hour all labor will cease, and all confusion. Briefly and unimportantly everything that passes over time. Do your work, work faithfully in My vineyard, and your reward will be great. Write, read, sing, sigh; remain silent, pray, endure all troubles courageously. Eternal life is worth all this, and even more struggle is worth it. Peace will come in one day, as the Lord knows. And it will not be the present day or the present night, but there will be unceasing light, endless lightness, strong peace and sure hope. And then you will not say: “Who will deliver me from the body of this death?”, and you will not cry: “Woe is me, for my coming will continue.” Thus, death will be overthrown, and there will be unchangeable salvation, the putting aside of all worries, blessed joy, sweet and glorious communication. Oh, when you saw in the sky the eternal crowns with which the saints are crowned, you would see with what glory now shine those whom in this world they held in contempt and considered nothing, as if they were unworthy of life itself, you would truly humble yourself to the ground, and would rather want to be inferior to everyone than to be superior to at least one; You would not wish for joyful days in this life, but would begin to rejoice in suffering for the sake of God, and it would seem to you that the greatest gain would be for people to regard you as nothing. Oh, if all this made sense to you and would sink deep into your soul, how would you dare to complain even once? For eternal life, how can one not endure every burden? It is no small matter to lose or gain the kingdom of God. Lift your eyes to heaven. “Behold, I and all My saints are with Me: those who have had great struggle in this age, now they have just rejoiced, now they are comforted, now they will be in safety and peace, and will abide with Me without end in the kingdom of My Father.” 2) Life. 15:1. Rome. 7:24. Ps. 119:5. Chapter 48. About the day of eternity and the disasters of this life O blessed dwelling of the highest city! O bright day of eternity, the night of which does not darken, and the supreme Truth illuminates unceasingly. The day is always joyful, always serene, never changing! Oh, if only that day would shine and everything temporary would come to an end! And it shines with an unceasingly radiant light among the saints, but is only visible to wanderers on earth from afar, as if in a mirror. The citizens of heaven know how joyful the day is there; the exiles, the sons of Eve, groan that the day here is bitter and unbearable. The days of the present age are small and evil, filled with sorrows and disasters: here a person is defiled by many sins, entangled in many passions, constrained by all kinds of fear, distracted by many worries, distracted by all kinds of inquisitiveness. entangled in many vanities: surrounded by many delusions, overwhelmed by many works; weighed down by temptations, weakened by pleasures, tormented by poverty. Oh, when will there be an end to so many troubles! When will I be freed from the miserable slavery of vice? When will I remember You alone, Lord? When will I fully rejoice in You? When will I be in true freedom without any hindrance, without any burden in spirit and in body? When will there be a perfect world, a serene and safe world, peace within and without, peace strong everywhere? Good Jesus, when will I rise and see You? When will I behold the glory of Your kingdom? When will you be everything to me? Oh, when will I be with You in Your Kingdom, which You have prepared for Your beloved from all eternity? I was left, a beggar and an exile, in the enemy’s land, where there is war every day and great misfortune. Comfort me in exile, tame my sorrow: all my desire sighs for You. For everything is a burden to me, everything that this world offers as consolation. From the depths I want to enjoy You, but I cannot achieve it. I long to cleave to the heavenly, but temporary things and unmortified passions press me down. In spirit I want to rise above everything, but the flesh, against my will, forces me to submit to it. So I, an unfortunate man, struggle with myself, and I have become intolerable to myself: the spirit calls me to the top, but the flesh drags me down. Oh, how I suffer internally when I think in spirit about heavenly things, and suddenly during prayer I am met with a swarm of carnal thoughts. My God, do not depart from me, and do not depart in anger from Your servant. Flash the lightning and make me marry; Your arrows will fly and all the dreams of the enemy will be crushed. Gather all my feelings for You, make me forget everything worldly; let me soon reject and despise the vicious dream. Help me, Eternal Truth, let not a single vanity move me. Come, heavenly sweetness, and let all uncleanness flee from Your presence. And also forgive me and let me go mercifully. when I keep You in my thoughts during prayer: - I truly confess that I am used to leaving myself in great absent-mindedness and where I stand or sit with my body, I am often not there at all, but there I am more present where my thoughts take me. There I am, where my thought is. There my thoughts are often, where my love is. and what most often comes to my mind is what pleases me by nature or what pleases me out of habit. Your word, the Eternal Truth, clearly speaks about this: where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. If I love heaven, I willingly think about heavenly things. If I love the world, my joy is about the sweets of the world and my sorrow is about the misfortunes of the world. If I have love for the flesh, most often I imagine carnal things; if I have love for the spirit, then I think about spiritual things in sweetness. What I love, I willingly talk about and listen to, and I take the image of that into my home with me. For blessed is the man who, for Your sake, Lord, has set free all created things from himself, who masters nature and crucifies carnal lusts with spiritual jealousy, may he offer You a pure prayer in a clear conscience, and may he be worthy to become in the face of the angels, having abolished everything earthly both inside and outside himself. 5) Ps. 70:12. Ps. 143:6. Chapter 49. About the desire for eternal life, and what rewards for the feat are promised My son, when you feel that the desire for eternal bliss is pouring into you from above, and you want to come out of the shadow of your body in order to contemplate My Lordship without any use of shadow: expand your heart and accept holy inspiration with all the desire of your soul. Give perfect praise to the Highest goodness, which acts in you with such favor, visits you in mercy, arouses you to jealousy, and strengthens you with strength, so that you do not fall to the ground from your own heaviness. You accept not from your own thoughts and not from your own will, but from the sole favor of the Highest grace and Divine charity, may you succeed in virtues and increase in humility, may you be prepared for the upcoming battle and may you be jealous to cleave to Me with all your heartfelt desire and serve Me with all your will. My son, fire often burns, but the flame does not rise without smoke. Thus, some have burning desires for heavenly things, and they are not free from temptation in bodily desires. This is why they do not act entirely purely for the glory of God, because they thus depart from God with their desires. This is often the case with your desire, which you imagined to be so persistent: and it cannot be pure and perfect, in which there is an admixture of your own benefit. Seek not what pleases you and what is convenient for you, but what pleases Me and what is to My glory. When you judge in truth, you must prefer My definition to your desire and everything that can be desired: and you must follow My will. I know your desire and I have heard your frequent sighs. You would like to already enter into the freedom of glory, children of God; you are already attracted to the eternal home and the heavenly home filled with joy. But the hour has not yet come; another time still lasts, a time of war, a time of labor and testing. You long for the fulfillment of the highest blessings, but you still cannot achieve it. I am; wait for me, says the Lord. until the kingdom of God comes. You still need to be tested on earth and tested in many ways. You will sometimes be given consolation, but you will not receive abundant satiation. Be strong and be strong in action, be strong in patience when you must endure what is contrary to nature. You need to put on a new man, and transform from your former self into a new man. You must often do what you don’t want; and leave what you want. Others will be successful. in your desires, you will not have any. What others say will be listened to; and whatever you say, they won’t pay any attention to it. Others will ask and receive, but you will ask and achieve nothing. Others will be great in the mouths of men, but no one will remember you. Others will be entrusted with this or that, but you will be considered good for nothing. Sometimes your nature becomes sad because of this, but it is a great thing when you endure it in silence. This and the like is a test for the faithful servant of the Lord in many ways, to see whether he can truly deny himself and overcome himself in everything. To see and endure what is contrary to your will: - in this, more than in everything else, you need to die to yourself; especially when something is ordered to happen that does not suit you, and that does not seem at all useful to you. Being under power, you do not dare to resist the command from above: and because of this, it seems difficult for you to act at the behest of other people, and in everything to abandon all thought about your own. Do not look, My son, at the fruit of such labors; look at the near end, at the immeasurably great reward - and you will feel not a burden, but strong consolation in your patience. Look: for the small share of your will that you voluntarily leave here, you will forever receive free will in heaven. And truly there you will find everything you want, everything. whatever you could wish for. There with you there will be strength for every good, and there will be no fear of loss. There your will will always be one with Me: you will not desire anything outside of yourself, or for yourself especially. There no one will oppose you, no one will complain at you, no one will interfere with you. no one will stand in your way; but everything desired will appear inseparably in the present. and all your desires will be renewed and fulfilled to the highest limit. There I will repay the dishonor suffered with glory, for sorrow with the robe of joy, for the last place with the throne of the kingdom forever. There the fruit of obedience will appear, repentant labor will rejoice, and humble submission will be gloriously crowned. And for this purpose now bow humbly under the hand of everyone; and let you not care about who said what, or from whom what was ordered: but most of all, take care to accept everything as good for you, no matter what is demanded of you, no matter what your superior, lesser, or equal assigns to you, and so that you try to fulfill everything with sincere will. Let them search - one for one thing, the other for another. Let them be famous for whatever they want, let them boast a thousand thousand times. You do not boast in either one thing or another, but rather boast in contempt of yourself and in My one good will and in My honor. Whether in life or in death, may God always be glorified in you - that’s what you should desire. 2) Rome. 8:21. OK. 22:18. Chapter 50. How a person in sorrow needs to surrender himself to the will of God Lord God, Holy Father, blessed be now and forever, for Thou hast willed this, this has been accomplished, and all the good things Thou hast done! Let Your servant rejoice in You, not in himself or in someone else. For You are the only true joy, You are my hope and my crown, You are my joy and my praise, Lord! What does Your servant have that he would not accept from You, and would not accept according to his own merit? Whatever You have given and whatever You have created, all is Your essence. I have been poor in labor since my youth, and my soul is often crushed to the point of tears, and it happens that my spirit is indignant within itself, from the attack of passions. I wish for the joy of the world, I sigh for the peace of Your sons, You Yourself shepherd them in the light of consolation. When You give peace, when You pour in holy joy, the whole soul of Your servant will be filled with harmonious harmony, and will be dedicated to Your praise. But how often does it happen that You move away, and then Your servant has no strength to walk along the path of Your commandments: - then his knees bend, and smiting his breasts, he falls. He didn’t feel the way he felt yesterday or the day before. when Your lamp shone above my head, and under the canopy of Your wings I hid from the pressure of temptations. Father, Righteous and All-Praised, the hour will come that Your servant may enter into temptation. Beloved Father, it is worthy at this hour for Your servant to endure for Your sake. Father, ever worshiped, the hour has come, which You have predestined for Your servant for a short time, so that he may be exhausted for a short time in the external, but may he live incessantly in You in the interior: the hour has come for him to remain a little in contempt, and in humiliation and in decline before men, to wear out in passions and in relaxation, so that he may rise with You at the dawn of a new light and may he be glorified in the villages of heaven, Holy Father, Your command! - You have been so pleased: and what happened to me, You have ordained. And this is Thy grace to Thy friend, so that for the sake of Thy love he may suffer and be grieved in the world, no matter how many times, and no matter how and from whomever You allow sorrow and suffering. Without Your advice and without Your providence and without a reason, nothing happens on earth. Good for me. God. for you have humbled me, so that I may learn Your justifications, and may I renounce all the loftiness of my heart and all self-conceit. It is to my advantage that my face was covered with confusion, so that I would seek You, and not men, for my consolation. And from this I came to know the fear of Your unsearchable judgment - that You strike the righteous and the wicked together - but in truth to both and in equality. I give you praise for not sparing the evil in me. but he exhausted me with bitter wounds, striking me with illnesses and sending me sorrows from without and from within. There is no one to console me in all of heaven, unless You, Lord my God, are the heavenly physician of souls: You have killed and created life, brought down to hell and raised up. Your punishment is upon me, and Your rod will guide me. Thus, Beloved Father, in Thy hand I bow, under the rod of Thy correction. Smite my spine and my neck; let every crook of mine be bent into Your will. Create in me a pious and humble disciple, in what good ways You know, so that I may walk according to Your every command. I entrust myself and everything I own to You for correction: it is better to be punished here than in the future world. You know everything and everything one by one, and nothing in human conscience can hide from You. Thou art all knowledgeable before their existence; and You do not need anyone to inform You or inform You about what is happening on earth. You know what is needed for my benefit, and how suffering is needed to cleanse the rust of vices. Do with me according to Your desired will, and do not despise my sinful life: no one in the whole world sees it and knows it in full, except You alone. Grant it to me. Lord, to know what one should know, to love what one should love, to praise what is pleasing to You, to respect what is precious in Your sight, to condemn what is unclean before You. Do not allow me to judge by the appearance of external sight, and to formulate opinions by hearing from ignorant people: but grant me to understand the visible and spiritual by true judgment, and above all else to seek in everything what is Your good will. Human feelings are often deceived in their judgment; The lovers of this age are also deceived when they become attached to only the visible. And will a person become any better if another person honors him more than himself? The deceitful of the deceitful, the vain of the vain, the blind of the blind, the sick deceive the sick, when they extol each other: and whoever praises someone in vain, praises him even more in truth; brings shame. No more is every man than he is in Thy sight 3 . 1) 1 Cor. 4:7. Ps. 87:16. 2) Job. 29:3. 4) Ps. 63:71. 5) Second. 32:39. To in. 13:2. 6) Dan. 13:42. Chapter 51 My son, it is impossible for you to maintain at every hour the same ardor in the desire for virtues and to always hold on to the highest degree of contemplation: but for the sake of the original illness, you sometimes need to descend to the lower limits, and bear the burden of corruptible life, even involuntarily and with regret. As long as you carry a mortal body, you will feel melancholy and heartbreak. And when you are in the flesh, you will often need to groan under the burden of the flesh, because you are unable to persistently remain in spiritual activity and in Divine contemplation. Then it is useful for you to resort to low work and external exercises, and to renew your strength in good deeds, with firm hope to await My coming and the highest visitation, to patiently endure your exile and dryness of heart until I visit you again, and then you will be freed from all anxiety. I will command you, and you will forget all your labors and enjoy inner peace. I will spread the meadows of the holy scriptures before you, and your heart will expand, and you will walk along the path of My commandments, and you will say: the passions of this time are unworthy of the glory that desires to appear in us. Chapter 52. That a person should not consider himself worthy of consolation, but more worthy of punishment Lord, I am unworthy of Your consolation, and of no spiritual visitation; and for this reason you deal righteously with me when you leave me poor and inconsolable. And even if I could shed a sea of ​​tears, I still would not be worthy of Your consolation. I am not worthy of anything except wounds and punishment, for I have gravely and often offended You and have committed many great sins. When I think about everything in truth, I am not worthy of even the slightest consolation. But You, the Generous and Merciful God, do not want the destruction of Your creation, and You show the wealth of Your goodness on the vessels of mercy - You deign to console Your servant without any merit, beyond human measure. And Your consolations are true, not like the flattering words of men. What are my deeds, Lord, why do you deprive me of heavenly consolation? I don’t know that I have done anything good, I only know that I have always been prone to vice and lazy to correct myself. It’s true, and it’s impossible for me to deny. If I say otherwise about myself, you will stand against me and there will be no one to justify me. What have I deserved for my sins—is it hell and eternal fire? I confess the truth. that I am worthy of all ridicule and contempt, and there is no place for me among Your faithful. And although it’s bitter for me to hear myself, I will expose my sins against myself in truth, so that Your mercy will bow to my prayer. What will I say? guilty, full of all confusion? There are no words in my mouth, except one word: I have sinned, Lord, I have sinned - have mercy on me, forgive me. Leave me for a little while, before I even go into the dark and gloomy land, into the land of eternal darkness. What You demand most from a criminal, from an unfortunate sinner, is that he may be contrite in heart and humble himself about his sins. In contrition and humility of the heart, the hope of forgiveness is born, the troubled conscience is reconciled, lost grace is returned, a person is protected from future wrath, and God and the repentant soul are met in a mutual holy kiss. The humble contrition of sinners is a sacrifice acceptable to You. God; - fragrant before Your face, more than incense - and like the fragrant ointment that You left your wife to pour on Your feet. A contrite and humble heart is not despised ecu. Here is a place of refuge from the evil of the enemy; here everything that has been twisted and defiled will be corrected and washed. 3) Job. 10:20. 4) Ps. 50:19. Chapter 53. About grace, which earthly wise people cannot know My son. My grace is precious and does not tolerate confusion with external things and with earthly consolation: and for this you must reject everything that hinders grace if you want grace to be poured out on you. Look for a hidden place for yourself, don’t get bored living with yourself in solitude, don’t demand anyone’s curious conversation; but above all, pour out reverent prayer to God, so that the collected thought remains within you. and my conscience remained pure. Consider the whole world as nothing: above everything external, set yourself the abolition of the soul in God; for it is impossible to abolish your soul in Me, and at the same time find pleasure in transitory things. It is necessary to move away from loved ones and loved ones, and to keep the spirit alienated from any temporary consolation. This is how Blessed Peter the Apostle exhorts that the faithful of Christ should consider themselves strangers and strangers in this world. Oh, when death comes, with what confidence will he die, whom no attachment holds in the world! But the sick spirit does not yet know how to understand that one can so renounce one’s heart from everything, and animal man does not know what freedom is in the inner man. However, if you want to truly become a spiritual person, you must renounce both those far and near, and fear no one more than yourself. If you completely conquer yourself, the rest will be easy to conquer: to triumph over yourself is a complete victory. He who keeps himself in subjection, so that his sensuality obeys his reason, and his reason obeys Me in everything, is the true conqueror over himself and the ruler of the world. If you have a burning desire to rise to such a height, you need to courageously make a beginning and take the ax to the very root: - you need to tear out and destroy the hidden and disorderly inclination towards yourself and towards any of your special and sensual good. From this vice, that a person loves himself randomly, comes everything that needs to be exterminated to the very root. When you defeat and overcome this evil, there will be great peace and unceasing tranquility. But few try to die to themselves completely, few completely strive to move away from themselves; That is why people remain entangled in themselves and cannot rise above themselves in spirit. And whoever wants to walk with Me in freedom must put to death all his evil and disorderly inclinations and not cling to any creature to the point of passion with disordered love. Chapter 54. Of the Various Motions of Nature and Grace My son. diligently note the movements of nature and grace: for they are very opposite, and the difference between them is so subtle that it can only be understood by a spiritual and internally illuminated person. Everyone seeks good, and everyone imagines something good in their deeds or words: that is why, under the guise of good, many are deceived. Nature is evil: it betrays many, entangles and deceives many, and always has itself in mind: grace walks in simplicity and turns away from all evil. does not think anything flattering; whatever he does, he does it solely for the sake of God, and in God he finally finds his peace. Nature is disgusted by mortification; she does not want to be in constraint and under power, neither in submission nor in voluntary submission: but grace tries to mortify itself, resists sensuality, seeks subordination, wants to submit, and does not want to use its own freedom: it loves to be under power and does not want to rule over anyone, but always wants to live, stand and abide under the will of God: and for the sake of God it is ready to humbly bow before every creature in man. Nature works for its own benefit and calculates what benefit will come from what: but grace does not look at what is useful and beneficial for itself, but cares most about what can be beneficial for everyone. Nature willingly accepts honor and respect for herself: and grace faithfully ascribes all honor and glory to God. Nature fears shame and contempt: grace rejoices in the name of Jesus in accepting dishonor. Nature loves rest and bodily peace; grace cannot exist in idleness, but accepts work with joy. Nature seeks the curious and beautiful, and turns away from the base and rude; but grace is pleased with the simple and humble, does not despise the rude, and is not ashamed to walk in old clothes. Nature cares about temporary things, rejoices over earthly gains, is sad about losses, and is irritated by a slight word of insult. But grace thinks about the eternal, does not cling to the temporal, is not embarrassed by material loss and is not upset by the harshest speeches, for it places its treasure and joy in heaven, where nothing perishes. Nature is greedy and more willing to receive than to give, loves what is its own and what is special. And grace is beneficent and sociable, avoiding the special; is content with little and considers giving more blessed than receiving. Nature inclines towards creatures, towards her flesh, towards vanity, towards distraction; grace attracts to God and to virtues. renounces creatures, flees from the world, hates carnal desires, does not indulge in free fermentation, is ashamed to appear among the people. Nature loves all external consolation, in which there is pleasure to the senses: grace, in the one God, seeks consolation for itself and wants to enjoy the supreme good above all visible things. Nature acts in everything for profit and for its own benefit; it cannot do anything for nothing, but for every good deed it hopes to receive either equal or better, or praise, or favor, and wants to attach as much value as possible to every deed and gift and every word. Grace does not seek anything temporary, and does not require any other reward in retribution except God alone; and for his temporary needs he desires only that which can serve to acquire eternal blessings. Nature rejoices over the multitude of friends and neighbors, is famous for the nobility of place and birth, pleases the strong, pleases the rich, and praises her own kind. And grace loves enemies, but does not exalt itself in the multitude of friends, does not consider place or birth great, unless there is an increase in virtue; He favors the poor more than the rich, has more sympathy with the innocent than with the strong, rejoices with the truthful and not with the flattering, and always preaches to the good to be zealous for the most perfect gifts and to be like the Son of God in virtues. Nature immediately begins to grumble in need and constraint: grace endures poverty in constant patience. Nature reflects everything on itself, argues for itself, justifies itself. Grace raises everything to God; everything comes from the Unworthy in the beginning; does not ascribe anything good to himself, does not have arrogant thoughts about himself; does not argue, and does not prefer his own opinion to the opinions of others, but in every feeling and understanding he submits himself to Eternal Wisdom and Divine testing. Nature longs to know secrets and hear news, wants to appear in the world and experience many things with her senses; wants to be known and do things to everyone's praise and surprise. But grace is not curious and does not care about news: for all such things come from old corruption, and there is nothing new and lasting on earth. •She teaches to tame feelings, to avoid vain servility and vanity, to humbly hide what is worthy of praise and surprise, and to seek fruit in every thing and in every knowledge for the benefit and praise and glory of God. He doesn’t want to preach to himself or anything of his own. but this is what He desires, that God may be blessed in all His gifts, and may He generously and give everything according to His sole goodness. And that grace is light above nature, and a special gift of God - the true seal of the elect and the guarantee of eternal salvation. It elevates a person from love for earthly things to love for heavenly things, and from the carnal makes him spiritual. Therefore, the more nature is oppressed and bound, the more abundantly grace is poured out; and the inner man is transformed every day by new visits into the image of God. Chapter 55. About the damage to nature and the action of Divine grace Lord my God, Who created me in Your image and likeness, You Yourself showed me the greatness of Your grace, and I learned from You. how, she is needed for salvation. Grant me some of this grace so that I can overcome my bad nature, which draws me to sin and destruction. I see another law in my life, opposing the law of my mind and captivating me with the sinful law, into obedience to sensuality in everything. I cannot resist her passions unless Your most holy grace comes to my aid, spilling into my heart like a hot stream. Thy grace is needed, and much grace. to defeat nature, which from my youth has always been inclined toward evil; for it fell in the first man Adam and was damaged by sin, and the penalty of that damage entered into all men; so that the first nature, created good and right by You, has already accepted all the vice and all the weakness of the damaged nature, and all its movements, when it is left to its own will, attract it to evil and plunge it down. And the little strength that remained in her. lies like a spark hidden in the ashes. This is the nature of our mind, enveloped in great darkness, and there is still in it the distinction of good from evil and lies from truth; although he does not have the strength to fulfill everything that he approves, and he does not possess the full light of truth and the integrity of common sense. Hence it happens, my God, that I delight in Your law according to the inner man, knowing that Your commandment is good and righteous and holy, and that it is necessary to flee all evil and all sin, I work in the flesh the law of sin, obeying as much reason as sensuality. That’s why I strive to do good, but I don’t get it. That’s why I often have a lot of good intentions, but there is no grace to help my weakness, and because of a slight obstacle I fall behind and become powerless. This is why it happens that I have learned the path of perfection and see quite clearly what I should do; but, having fallen under the burden of my damage, I do not rise to perfection. Oh, how necessary I am. Lord, Thy grace, for beginning in goodness, for success and for perfection! Without You I can do nothing: but I can do everything in You, when Your grace strengthens me. Truly heavenly grace - without it, one’s own merits and all natural gifts are counted as nothing. Neither knowledge, nor wealth, nor beauty, nor physical strength, nor intelligence, nor eloquence are worth anything to You. Lord, without Your grace; for natural gifts are available to the evil as well as to the good; and the special gift of the elect is grace or good haste, and those sealed with it are made worthy of eternal life. And this grace is so excellent that neither the gift of prophecy, nor the working of miracles, nor the highest speculation can be counted as anything without it. Neither faith, nor hope, nor other virtues are pleasing to You without love and grace. Oh, most blessed grace, making the poor in spirit rich in virtues, and making the rich with many blessings humble in heart! Come, descend upon me, fill me with your consolation in good times, so that my soul does not droop from fatigue and dryness of feeling. I pray to You, Lord, that I may find grace in Your sight; for grace suffices me, even if I have received nothing else that nature requires. Even if I am much weary and much tempted in sorrows, I will not be afraid of evil, so long as Thy grace remains with me. She is my strength; She gives me advice and help. She is stronger than all enemies, and more wise than all the wise. She teaches the truth and instructs in the rule of life; she is the light of the heart, the joy of consolation; drives away sadness, takes away fear, nourishes reverence, and brings forth tears. What am I without her - is the tree dry and the stump barren, ready to be cut? But may Your grace, Lord, always precede me and follow me, and may He constantly support me in caring for good deeds, through Jesus Christ Your Son. Amen. 1) Rome. 7:23. 2) Gen. 8:21. 3) Rom. 2:22, 12, 25,18. Chapter 56. That we must deny ourselves and imitate Christ in the cross My son, the further you leave yourself, the more you will turn to Me. He who does not desire anything external finds inner peace; and he who renounces himself internally unites with God. I want you to learn to completely surrender yourself to My will, without grumbling or arguing. Follow Me: I am the way and the truth and the life. Without a path there is no walking, without truth there is no knowledge, without life there is no being. I am the path you must follow, the truth you must believe in, the life you must hope for. I am the unchanging path, the immutable truth, the endless life. I am the only right path, the supreme truth, true life, blessed life, uncreated life. If you continue in My way, you will come to know the truth, and the truth will set you free, and you will inherit eternal life. If you want to take it into your belly, keep the commandments. If you want to know the truth, believe Me. If you want to be perfect, sell everything. If you want to be My disciple. deny yourself. If you want to inherit the blessed life, despise the present life. If you want to be great in heaven, humble yourself in the world. If you want to reign with Me, bear the cross with Me; for some ministers of the cross find life in blessedness and in the true light. Lord Jesus. just as Your life was cramped and in contempt of the world, so grant me, imitating You, to be with You in contempt by the world. For there is no servant greater than his master, nor a disciple greater than his teacher. Let Your servant be tempted in Your life, for in it is my salvation and true holiness. Apart from her, no matter what I read or what I hear, nothing delights me and gives me complete joy. My son, you have read all this, you have learned all this. If you do this, blessed will you be if I do. He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me: and I will love him, and will appear to him Myself, and will cause him to sit with Me in the kingdom of My Father. Be with me, O Lord, according to Thy word and according to Thy promise, worthy to receive from Thee. I accepted, accepted the cross from Your hand; I will bear it until death, just as You laid it on me. And in truth, the life of a good monk is a cross, but with that cross we will enter heaven. The beginning has been made, we cannot go back and we must not lag behind. Listen, brothers, let us go forward together, Jesus will be with us. For Jesus' sake we took up the cross; For Jesus' sake let us stand firm in the cross. Whoever is our leader and predecessor will be our helper. Behold, our King comes before us and will fight for us. Let us follow Him courageously, let no one fear fear; Let us be ready to die in battle; We will not allow our glory to be dishonored, we will not run away from the cross. 1) In. 14:6; 8:32. 2) Matt. 19:17. 3) Matt. 10: 24. 4) In. 8:17; 14:21. Chapter 57 My son, patience and humility in troubles are more pleasing to Me than great joy in happiness. Or is your sadness because they said a small word against you? Even if that were more important, you shouldn’t be embarrassed. Leave it, let it pass: it’s not the first time this has happened to you, it’s not news, and it won’t be the last time if you live. You have enough courage as long as there is nothing nasty. And you reason sensibly, and you know how to strengthen others with your words, but when a sudden misfortune comes to your door, your reason and strength will disappear. Look to what extent your powerlessness reaches: how often and in the smallest troubles you have experienced this yourself. But all this happens to you for the sake of your salvation. 1. Son of humility and reverence, your When something like this happens, strengthen yourself as best you can with all your heart; and if misfortune has already befallen you, do not be disheartened by it, and do not remain long in confusion of thought. At least bear it patiently, if you cannot bear it joyfully. And if it is bitter for you to hear, and a murmur rises in your soul, restrain yourself, do not allow an dishonest word to come out of your mouth, so that no one will be offended by the little ones. Soon the excited feeling will calm down, grace will return and the inner pain will be quenched. I am still alive, says the Lord, ready to help you, ready to fill you with consolation even more abundantly than before, if you place your trust in Me and call upon Me in reverence. Be more complacent and prepare for even greater trials. Not everything has yet perished because you often see yourself in troubles or in grave temptations. You are the man. not God; flesh, not an angel. How could it be possible for you to always remain in the same state of virtue, when this was not given to either the angel in heaven or the first man in heaven? And they didn’t hold out for long. I who are lost strive for salvation, and whoever recognizes his weakness, I will bring him closer to My Divinity. Lord, blessed be Your word and sweeter than honey and honeycomb in my mouth. What would I do in all my troubles and needs if You did not strengthen me with Your holy word? If only I could reach the haven of salvation - what do I need, how much and in what way will I suffer! Send me a good death, send me a blessed exodus from this world. Remember me, my God, and guide me on the right path into Your kingdom. Amen. 2) Is. 49:18. 3) Job. 5:11. 4) Ps. 18:11. Chapter 58. About the fact that we should not seek higher ourselves and experience the hidden judgments of God My son, beware of judging about sublime objects and the hidden destinies of God: why one is so abandoned, and the other is exalted to such grace: why one lives in such grief, and the other is exalted so gloriously before everyone. This matter is beyond any human power. and no reason and no reasoning will stand to test the judgment of God. So, when the enemy begins to inspire you with such thoughts or an inquisitive person begins to question you, answer with a prophetic word: righteous ecu, Lord, and righteous are your judgments. and one more thing: the destinies of the Lord are true, justified together. One should fear My destinies, and not over-judge them: for they are incomprehensible to the human mind. Do not yet judge or enter into controversy about the dignity of the saints, who is holier than whom or who is greater in the kingdom of heaven. From here useless disputes and competitions often arise, feeding only pride and vanity in people; This is where discord arises, when one tries, out of pride, to place one saint higher, and another another. The desire to know all this and explore it does not bear any fruit, and the saints are not pleased at all. For I am not the God of disorder, but the God of peace: and this peace consists of humility, and not exaltation. Others, diligently honoring this or that saint, feel a special commitment to him: but in this feeling, more than human, the saints received holiness from Me: I bestowed grace. I glorified with glory: I know the dignity of everyone, I preceded everyone with a blessed blessing; I foreknew My beloved ones before the ages. I have chosen them out of the world; They did not choose Me. I called with grace, attracted with mercy. I led them through all sorts of temptations. I filled them with great consolation, I gave them constancy, I crowned their patience. I know both the first and the last, and I embrace everyone with innumerable love. Praise is due to Me in all My saints: Blessing above all is due to Me, and My glory is in each and all whom I have so gloriously magnified and presented, without any prior merit. And for the one who despises one of My little ones, he will not bring honor to the greatest of Me, for I have created both small and great. Whoever disparages one from the saints disparages Me and all others in the kingdom of heaven. All are one in the union of love; everyone has the same feeling and will, and everyone has the same love for each other. And what is even more perfect is that they love Me more than themselves and their merits. They are delighted above themselves, delighted beyond their own love, they are completely directed into My love, and rest in it with co-delight. Nothing can turn them away or tire them; for, filled with eternal truth, they burn with the fire of unquenchable love. So, let carnal and spiritual people stop speculating about the state of the saints - those who do not know how to love any other joy than their own special one. According to their inclination they add and take away, and not for the sake of the eternal Truth. There is a lot of ignorance, especially among unenlightened people, that they rarely know how to love anyone with perfect spiritual love. They are also strongly attracted to one or the other by natural inclination or human friendship, and as they feel in earthly things, so they imagine heavenly things. But there is no comparison between what imperfect people think and what enlightened people see in high revelation. Beware, My son, of inquisitively reasoning about what is beyond your knowledge; But most of all, put your work into this and confirm your thoughts in this, so that you may appear to be even the least in the kingdom of God. And if a person knew who is holier than whom and who is greater than whom in the kingdom of heaven, what benefit does this knowledge have for him - if it does not help him to humble himself before Me and then rise up to glorify My name. Thinking about the multitude of your sins and the poverty of your virtues and how far you are from the perfection of the saints is much more pleasing to God than arguing about which of them is more and who is less holy. It is better to call upon the saints with fervent prayers and tears, and with a humble thought to incline them to honest intercession, rather than strive to penetrate their secrets with vain inquisitiveness. The saints are all content and blessed - if only people knew how to be content and pacify their vain reasoning. They are not famous for their merits and do not even attribute anything good to themselves, but assign everything to Me. for I have given them everything from My infinite love. They are so filled with divine love and abundant joy that there is nothing more to add to their glory, nor to add to their bliss. They are all holy, and the higher they are in glory, the more humble they are in themselves, the more they are close to Me and beloved by Me. And the Scripture speaks about this: lay down your crowns before God and fall on your face before the Lamb and worship Him who lives forever. Many people ask who is greater in the kingdom of God, and they do not know about themselves whether they will be worthy to be counted with the lesser in the kingdom. And this is great - to be less in heaven, where everyone is great, for all will be called sons of God and will be. The little one will be a thousand years old, but if a sinner dies a hundred years old, he will be damned. And when the disciples asked who would be greatest in the kingdom of heaven, they heard the following answer: unless you turn and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever humbles himself like a child is the one who is sick in the kingdom of heaven. Woe to those who are considered unworthy to humble themselves along with little children, woe to them, for the door of the kingdom of heaven is low, and it will be impossible for them to enter it. Woe to the rich, who have their consolation here: the poor will enter the kingdom of God, and they will stand outside the door and weep. Rejoice, you humble and poor, be lifted up in spirit, for the kingdom of God is yours if you also walk in the truth. 1) Ps. 68:137; 18:10. 2) 1 Cor. 14:33. 3) Ps. 20:3. In. 15:16, 19. 4) Pres. 6:8 8) Rev. 6:10, 9) Isa. 60:22; 65:20. Matt. 18:3, 4. 10). OK. 6:20, 24 . Chapter 59. About the fact that we must affirm all hope and confidence in the One God Lord, what is my confidence that I have in this life? Of all the things in heaven, what is my first consolation? Is it not in You, O Lord my God? His mercy is endless, isn't it? Where have I ever been happy without You? Or when something bad could happen to You? I would rather be poor for Your sake than rich without You. It is better for me to wander on earth with You than to have power in heaven without You. Where You are, there is heaven: death and hell are everywhere where You are not. You are in my desire, and for this I need to groan and cry out and beg with prayer for You. And in the end, in my needs, I cannot completely place my trust in timely help, except in You, my only God. You are my hope and my confidence, You are my Comforter, faithful in everyone. Everyone is looking for their own: You think about my only salvation and my perfection and turn everything for my good. If you expose me to various troubles and temptations, and you arrange all this for my benefit, for You want to test Your beloved in every way. And in those trials, the same love and the same praise are due to You, as in heavenly consolations, if You filled me with them. So, in You, Lord my God, I place all my hope and refuge, in You I affirm every grief and every need: for in everything that I see besides You, I find only powerlessness and inconstancy. Many friends are not helpful, strong allies are unable to give help, and wise advisers will not give useful instruction. and learned books will not console, and nothing valuable in the world will redeem, and no secluded and pleasant place will provide a safe fence - if you Yourself do not intercede, deliver, strengthen, console, instruct, observe. And everything that successfully seems to lead to the acquisition of peace and prosperity is nothing without You, and truly does not bring prosperity at all. In You is the end of all blessings, and the pinnacle of life, and the depth of the verbal verb, and there is no other strong consolation for all Your servants - unless they place their trust in You above all else. I lift up my eyes to You, I trust in You faithfully. My God, Father of all mercies. Bless and sanctify my soul with a divine blessing, may Your dwelling be holy and may there be a throne of Your eternal glory, and may nothing obstinate in the sight of Your Majesty appear in the church of Your honor. But to the multitude of Thy mercies and according to the majesty of Thy goodness, look upon me and hear the prayer of Thy poor servant, wandering far from Thee in the land of the shadow of death. Cover and preserve the soul of Your servant in the many troubles of perishable life. and by Thy grace guide the path of peace to the native land of unceasing light. Amen. 1) Ps. 144:13. 4) Ps.50:2. Is. 9:2. Publications by this scientist: 1. Prolegomena zu einer neuen Ausgabe der Imitation nach dem Autograph. I-r B. Berl. 1873. 522 pp. 2. Thomae Kempensis de Imitatione Christi. Ed. Hirsche. Berl. 1874–3. Imitation de Jesus Christ. Reproduction en facsimile du manuscrit autographe. Leipzig. 1879. In the original: “says the humble St. Francis". You might be interested in: